It's been a few hours since Blake left. I'm getting ready to go for a much needed run. "What are you doing?" Jess asks as she enters the house. "I'm going for a run. I just have a lot on my mind." I tell her.
"Like what?"
"You already know."
"Mm. Have you guys talked about it?"
"Sort of... I guess? We tried talking about it and it just ended up with me telling him to leave."
"Why?"
"He just pisses me off sometimes."
"Well, shit. I mean relationships aren't always rainbows and butterflies. There's going to be days where you're not going to like each other. And you guys are going to have to be able to get through some tough times together, this being one of them. Stop taking the easy way out and just try I mean really try."
"True."
"Now if it's one thing I noticed is that it's always him making the first move saying he's sorry. Now it's your turn to be the bigger person. Go over there and talk to him. Let him know you're there for him."
"Alright." I pause for a moment get myself together.
"Get him." Jess urges.
"Okay." I laugh. I get up, grab my keys and head out the door. I text Blake in the car and let him know I'm coming over. He texts back telling me he's not there at the moment. He's at newly single, DJ's house. All I can do is hope that DJ isn't giving him ideas or putting stuff in his head. I text him back.
Me: Well do you want to talk later or?
BG: I had plans to chill with some of the guys tonight.
Me: Now you're telling me?
BG: I was trying to tell you this morning before you told me to leave soo.. Yeah. Don't really know what to say.
Me: Okay. What about tomorrow?
BG: Can't. I have plans with Ford then I have practice and a game.
Me: After the game?
BG: We're leaving to Dallas after the game.
Me: Let me know when you're free I guess.
Wow. I have to make a fucking appointment with my boyfriend. Correction, my fiancé. Is this how it's going to be when we're married? Sigh. I suppose I can go for that run now.
After my run I stop at the store and pick some stuff up for supper. Blake hasn't texted or called since. I just want to make things right and stop fighting.
I arrive home and find Jess in the kitchen getting prepped. I set the bags of groceries on the counter. "Tell me.. What happened? Did you guys talk?" She asks. "No. Here." I hand her my phone and let her read the text messages while I start supper. "Busy man. I feel like he can squeeze you in somewhere in there."
"No. I'm not going to beg."
"I don't know what to tell you. Both of you are being big headed."
"It is what it is."
Over the next few days I don't hear from him. No communication from either sides. Totally not healthy. I'm at work trying to focus. Jess and I join a couple of our co workers for lunch. "So, I heard their selecting a few of us to deploy out." My co worker, Sarah tells us. "What?" I say in disbelief. "Yeah, it's just what I heard." She says.
"But who though?" I ask.
"Well, I seen a list on Master Sarge's desk. I seen a few names and you both were on it." She tells us.
"Awesome. This'll be my first time out in a while." Jess says excitedly.
"Are you sure my name was on there? Was it really the list though? I don't think there'd just be a list laying out like that." I say worriedly. I don't want to be out of the states with everything that's going on and after what happened last time. I still get anxiety every now and then.
