Through His Eyes

Chapter Sixteen

A/N Happy 2016 everyone! I also I'm sorry for the confusion on why Cam moved, it was my fault. I fixed the problem. Thanks for reading :)
I sigh for the millionth time as Cameron's face flashes in my mind, full of surprise, confusion, and an unrecognizable emotion.
"Hey," I look over at Xavier to see him smiling softly at me.
"Is everything alright? Are you not having fun?" Xavier asks. I smile at him the best to my ability.
"I'm having a lot of fun. I'm sorry, I've just got a lot on my mind." I say. I look around the arcade and smile at all the people, they look like they are having fun. Once Xavier picked me up he took me to this huge arcade that was one town over. It has so many games, truthfully this would be amazing if I wasn't so heartbroken. I shake my head and try to focus on having fun with Xavier. He is a really nice person and I want to get to know him more. Xavier lightly grabs my arm and drags me towards a booth in the food section of the arcade. I look up at him, surprised. He smiles softly at me, I look down at his tattoo on his arm, not wanting to meet his eyes.
"It's no big deal, really." I say, not wanting to bother him with my problems. 
"Come on Hailee."  He says.  I sigh.  I begin to tell him every horrible thing that has happened from beginning to its bitter end.
"I can't believe he did that to you."  Xavier says, shaking his head.
"I've never dated anyone before and I honestly let myself believe that what we had was real.  We weren't together for that long but as crazy as it sounds, I fell for him deeper and deeper every day. I thought he was different, I thought that he liked me."  I say, shakingly, a lone tear falls down my cheek and I quickly wipe it off. 
"I'm sorry, I'm so stupid for letting him affect me this much."  I say.  Xavier lays his hand on top of my arm soothingly.
"It's perfectly normal to get upset over him.  He broke your heart, you trusted him, and he hurt you, for something as greedy as money.  I haven't known you for that long but I can tell you are a king person who cares a lot for other people.  You definitely did not deserve for that to happen to you."  He says.  More tears form in my eyes.  I laugh bitterly.
"I told myself I wasn't going to cry.  I'm sorry."  I say.  I close my eyes and try to wipe away my tears.  Xavier lightly places his hand on the back of my neck and puts my head in between his neck and shoulder.  My eyes widen in shock.  W-What is he doing?  My mind flashes to all the different times Cam has comforted me and held me in his arms.  What I wouldn't give for this all to be a bad dream and be in those arms around.  I sob harder into Xavier's shoulder, completely forgetting it's not Cam's arms around me but Xavier's.  Cam's smile is burned inside my mind, it's hard to believe that his smile was always fake. 
"What the hell?!  What did you do to her?!"  I hear someone exclaim loudly.  I pull away from Xavier and look up to see Cam holding a little boy with bright green eyes.  He looks shocked and angry.
"What is going on?!"  Cam exclaims, fury expressed on his face.  The little boy struggles in Cam's arms.  Cam looks down at the adorable little boy.
"Bubba, down."  The little boys says.  My eyes widen when I realize this adorable little boy is Cam's brother Colby.  Cam puts him on the ground and Colby walks over to me, I smile at him and lean down to be his eye level.  His little hand reaches out and wipes away my tears.
"Why you crying?"  Colby asks me.  I smile at him, he is so adorable.
"Yes, why are you crying?"  The older Blake asks.  I look up at him and immediately regret it.  The pure look of anger and hurt in his eyes, makes my heart hurt.  Cam moves his eyes off me and to Xavier behind me.  Xavier lays his hand on my shoulder as Cam glares at him.
"Hailee, is this him?"  He asks.  I nod. 
"Get your hand off of her."  Cam says angrily.  My eyes trail down to little Colby Blake who is currently looking frightened.  I move down onto the floor.
"Hi, my name is Hailee.  I'm guessing you are Colby, it's nice to meet you."  I say.  He smiles up at me and reaches out his hand.  I shake his little hand.
"You my bubba's wady?"  Colby asks.  I smile sadly at him.
"No, I'm not."  I say.  I stand up and Colby reaches his arms up.  I pick him up and balance him on my hip.  Cam reaches out and touches my arm.  I shake him off.
"Who is he?  What did he do?"  Cam asks.  I look up at him.
"Xavier didn't do anything to me, you did."  I say.  I turn to Xavier.
"I'm sorry, I didn't know he was going to be here."  I say.  Xavier smiles.
"It's okay."  He says.  Cam glares at him and he walks over and smiles at Colby.
"Hey buddy, want to play some games while we let your brother talk to the nice lady?"  He asks.  I let Colby down and he walks off with Xavier.  I look up to see Cam looking after them.
"Don't worry, Xavier is a nice guy, plus I have his keys."  I say, waving them in the air. 
"Nice guy?!  The guy has tattoos and looks a few years older, where did you even meet that guy?!"  Cam exclaims. Anger courses through me as I glare at him.
"Not that it's any of your business but I met him at the Zone." I say. I start to feel the all too familiar clench in my heart and he takes a step towards me, his hand reaching out. I back away.
"You don't get to touch me anymore. What are you doing here anyway?" I ask. Cam sighs and runs his hand through his hair, his biceps flexing in anger. I tear my eyes away from him.  I will not let his unbelievable attractiveness lure me in, because I know what's truly underneath. 
"Colby wanted to spend some time with me and I thought it would be fun to bring him to the arcade." He says. Oh that's right, they just opened the new six and under part of the arcade. I look around the arcade to see Colby and Xavier playing Pac-Man together, Colby hoisted up so he could see the game.
"Colby is adorable." I say. Looking over at him. It's so funny to see an edgy looking guy with an adorable little boy.
"He's always wanted to meet you but I was always busy with football, my part time job, and spending time with you, and visiting my grandma.  I need to spend more time with him, I've been worried about him, spending all that time with his daycare and his babysitter just quit."  He says, sighing.  I never knew he had so much going on, I never knew that he had a job, he always seemed as he had a handle on everything, he never told me that much about his life away from school, but yet again, I didn't know as much about him as I thought. I look between Cam and Colby. The smile on the little boys voice is enough for me to make up my mind.
"Cameron."  I say, turning his attention to me, his face sad.
"I'd be willing to babysit Colby." I say. Cam looks at me with shocked expressed clearly on his face.
"You would do that for me?" He asks. I shake my head.
"No, not for you. For him." I say, looking over at Colby. Setting Colby up with another stranger probably isn't easy on Cam and they both need someone they can depend on. Even though I would never say this aloud and I hate myself for thinking it but partly this is for Cam as well. 
"Thank you so much, this will help a lot."  He says, pulling me into his arms.  That sickly ache in my chest comes back as I push him away. I have missed his arms around me.  Even though it was never real, it always felt real to me. I cross my arms, protecting myself.
"Hailee-" He starts to say softly.
"Now you have two less things to worry about." I say, interrupting him. He recoils as if I had just hit him.
"You were never a bother." He says softly. I scoff.
"Of course not, you'd have to care about me even a little to let me bother you." I say angrily. I shake my head and walk towards where Xavier is waiting for us to finish. Without turning around I say,
"Do you still have my phone number?" I ask.
"Yes." He whispers, almost sounding heartbroken. I shake those thoughts out of my mind. He hurt me, I didn't hurt him.
"Text me the times you'll drop him off and pick him up from my house." I say, walking away. I grab Xavier and say goodbye to Colby.
"Can we leave, please?" I ask. Xavier nods and we walk out together.  Every step is painful as I walk away from the man that hurt me so deeply.  I will start babysitting his little brother soon which means I'll have to see him more often but at least that will help me with getting over him.  There will always be a small part of me that wishes things were different but even if they were, he wouldn't be the same.  He was only nice to me for the money.  That's all he saw when he was with me.
-----
After apologizing profusely for our day being ruined Xavier dropped me off at my house. I am now sitting in my dads car, days later, heading to school, thinking about what happened that night. I can't believe I barley knew anything about him. I don't know what his job is, it's not really my place to ask anymore, I'm no longer his girlfriend. Now that I think back on it he did look tired and pale yesterday.  He must be working himself too much, between his job and football.  No matter how much I try to stop thinking about him, tell myself it was never real, I still care about him.  I keep hoping, deep inside, that I'll wake up one day and it will all be a horrible nightmare.  My dad pulls up to the school and I grab my stuff.
"Thanks Dad, I'll see if Jake and Kylie can take me home.  Love you."  I say, opening the door.
"Hailee, do you want to talk about it?" Dad asks. I look over at him and see a concerned look on his face. I smile at him.
"I'm okay Dad." I say, partly lying. A broken heart is not easily fixed. I get out of the car and head into school, a place that I once was excited to go to and am now terrified.  I head towards my locker and quickly open it.  Something falls out.  I bend down and pick up a card.  Where did this come from?  A picture of me and Spencer is taped to the front.  It was a picture we took when we all went to play laser tag last year and Spencer and I won.  We are all dressed up in our gear and guns, smiling widely. I open the card and am met with Spencer's slightly horrible handwriting. An ache in my chest starts to form.
Hailee-
I'm sorry that I can't say this face-to-face but I was too afraid you would run away and not listen. I can't say I don't deserve it. You always have been such an amazing friend to me. You were always there for me when I needed you but when you needed me the most I betrayed you. I found out about Blake's plan by accident. I confronted him about it but he was so convincing that I had promised not to tell as long as he told you the truth. I was stupid to trust him. I should have told you immediately what was happening and maybe things would have turned out differently. I love you so much Hails, more than you know, and I can't lose you. I know I'm a huge jackass and a bad friend but is there even a slight chance that you can forgive me? I'll do anything for us just to be friend again. I'm so sorry.
-Love, Spence
I take a deep breath, contemplating what to do.  He seems sincere and I've known Spencer for a long time, I knew deep down he would never do anything to hurt me intentionally but that doesn't mean that it didn't hurt me. 
"Could you ever forgive me?"  I hear a strong voice ask.  I turn around to see Spencer looking at me with a sad look on his face. 
"You really hurt me."  I say, tears filling my eyes. Pain envelopes his face.
"I know and I feel horrible about it.  I never wanted you to get hurt and the fact that I hurt you tears me apart.  I can't live without you Hails.  Who will make me laugh even when I'm sad?  Hailee, it's always been you and me.  We are always a pair, I can't lose you.  I don't know how to live without you."  Spencer says desperately. I laugh slightly at his exaggeration. I wipe away my tears. Spencer walks towards me and pulls me into his arms, hugging me tightly. I hug him back, taking comfort in his familiar embrace. 
"I missed you."  I say.  He hugs me tighter.
"I missed you too, more than you know."  Spencer says.  We pull apart and smile at each other.  He never meant to betray me, he was only trying to make Cam do the right thing.  Even though it wasn't a wise choice on his part, he did it for me.  He has always done everything he can for me. He smiles widely at me and grabs my things.
"Come on, let's get to class. I heard there is going to be an assembly after lunch. Want to sit together?"  He asks.  I smile. 
"Sure."  I say.  We walk together towards my first period.
-----
I walk towards the cafeteria with Kylie. I already told her about what happened with Spencer and she was thrilled that we can all be together again. I walk into the cafeteria and head towards where Jake and Spencer are waiting for us. I go to sit down but I notice Cam heading our way. I walk towards the door, it's too painful to talk to him. It's so painful talking to him, looking at him, I spend all my time wishing that everything that has happened was a nightmare.  I can't stand the mixed feelings I get when I'm around him.  One part of me wants to cry and be angry and the other part wants to kiss him senseless and pretend that nothing ever happened. I know that running away from my problems isn't the best solution but if I don't, I might give in. I'm just about out the door when an hand grabs my arm lightly.
"Hailee wait. Please, can we talk?" Cam asks. I shake my head.
"No." I say, trying to pull away.
"Please, I know I don't deserve it but please let me explain." Cam pleads.  I shake my head and pull away but he won't let go of my hand.  His eyes pleading and desperate.  I tug my arm, wincing at the grip he has on it.  Spencer appears beside me, shoving Cam.
"You're hurting her."  Spencer says angrily. Cam lets go of my arm and I quickly hold it against my body. Cam states at my arm.
"I-I'm so sorry." He says, painfully. He rushes out the door. I watch after him, hurt applying pressure on my heart.
----------
I sit next to Kylie, smiling at her.  After lunch we all walked to the room where they have assemblies, it's also where we have concerts.  There are rows of seats and nice big stage.  Up on top of the stage is a banner displaying an ad for the talent show.
"Oh god. Don't tell me that they are going to force people to do the talent show again." Kylie groans. Last year there wasn't enough people that signed up for the talent show so the principal said that if twenty people didn't sign up we couldn't have a prom. Needless to say he isn't a good principal and people signed up.
"As long as I don't get forced into it I'm okay with it." Spencer says. I laugh.
"I'll do anything that gets me out of fifth period." I say, smiling. I notice someone stops beside me. I look up to see Cam staring down sadly at me. My breath catches in my throat as all my sadness returns. I close my eyes and take a deep breath.
"Cam please, I've had enough. Please." I beg him.
"I'll leave, I just came to talk to Kylie." Cam says. I look up at Cam then to Kylie. She looks just as surprised as me. She stands and walks away with Cam. I stare at there backs, confused.
"What does he want with Kylie?" Jake asks. I gasp.
"You don't think he's going after her now, do you?" I ask. The thought hurts me deeply but I wouldn't put it past him. Maybe I am being overdramatic but he hurt me and if he is the kind of person that would make someone fall for him for money then he is capable of a lot more. Kylie nods and walks back towards us. She takes her seat and looks at Jake.
"So are we going over to yours later?" She asks. I stare at her intensely. Wondering what she and Cam could have been talking about. I was about to ask when the lights dim and the lights on the stage turn on. The wholes rage lit with bright light and the rest of the auditorium dark.  The principal walks onto the stage and takes the microphone.
"Students it's that time of year again when we sign up for the talent show. This year we are only doing singing and dancing. We-" I trail off from listening to the principal to see Cam walking towards the stage. Cam walks up the stairs and towards the principal.
"What is he doing?!" I exclaim.  I watch in shock as Cam takes the microphone away from the principal forcefully.  Mr. Evans, our principal, states at Cam shocked and anger.
"What are you doing young man?!"  Me. Evans exclaims, trying to take the microphone back but Cam blocks his attempts to grab it.  I can just barley hear the principals voice through the distance and the whispers coming from the other students. 
"Sorry for the interruption but I have something very important to say."  Cam say, his voice echoing through out the auditorium.  What is he doing?  He just interrupted an school wide assembly.  He just stole the microphone from our principals hands.  He's going to get in a lot of trouble.
"Hailee Cast,"  Cam says though the microphone, looking around, trying to see where I'm sitting.  Oh no.  No way.  He is not calling out for me in front of the entire school.  Dread fills me at what he might say in front of everyone.  I have to get out of hear.  I quickly grab my things and go to leave but Kylie grabs my arm.  She smiles sadly at me.
"You can't keep running away from your problems.  You have to stay, no matter what he has to say you have to stay with your head held high, good or bad it shows everyone how strong you are."  Kylie says.  I stare at her, not believing that she is trying to stop me. I sigh and sit back down. Cam has now found where I am sitting and smiles at me. Mr. Evans makes another attempt to steal the microphone back from Cam but he easily blocks him.
"Please, just let me do this. I promise that you can do whatever you want to me after this, hell I'll even quit the football team and leave school for a month, just let me say this." Cam pleads to Mr. Evans. Mr. Evans scowls then reluctantly nods. I stare wide eyed at our principal. I can't believe he gave in that easily. Mr. Evans fold his arms across his chest angrily but doesn't make any attempt to take back the microphone. Cam looks back through the crowd until his eyes land on me. My heart aches at his gaze. Don't forget what he did to you.
"For the people that don't know me, I'm Cameron Blake, I'm a player on the football team and started here for the first time this year.  I had high hopes for a wonderful experience for my final year of high school.  On my first day of school I did a horrible, terrible thing that lead me to the kindest person that I have ever known that person was Hailee Cast. Hailee taught me so many things and showed me a different view on life. My life that was once filled with loneliness and despair had changed into pure happiness and the need to make her happy too. She showed me how to have fun even in the darkest of times. She showed up everyday, even if everything is going wrong, with a smile on her face just to make everyone's day better. She is a kind, unselfish, beautiful person and I was lucky enough to call her mine. I forced my way into her life, never expecting that she would change mine. Everyday, again and again, she showed me how truly great of a person she is, she tried so hard to help everyone, to be kind to everyone and at the end of the day I never felt worthy of her. Hell, I still don't feel worthy of her. When I got her to open up and trust me with her whole being I was so happy. I never meant to crush that trust but I did. I was stupid, I am a horrible human being. We started dating and I never told you the truth, it ate me up inside but I still never told you. Why didn't I tell you?  Hailee, I know that what I did was wrong, it was downright atrocious but everything I said, everything I did was the truth.  I stopped playing his stupid game the moment I found out he hurt you.  I know I don't deserve it.  I know that you deserve better than me.  But I will do everything I can to earn back your trust.  So up here, in front of the whole school, I will tell them all what I need.  Everyone deserves to know what kind of a person I am."  Cam declared in front of the entire school.  Tears are coming down my face at the end of his speech.  I can't believe he did this.  Fear courses through me as I realize he is about to tell everyone what he did.  He will be a social pariah, everyone will hate him.  Before I know what I'm doing, my feet begin to move and take me towards the stage.  I run up the stairs and towards Cam, quickly taking the microphone out of his hands.
"What do you think you're doing?! You can't tell everyone!" I exclaim, trying to wipe my tears away. Cam lays a hand on my cheeks, wiping my tears away with his thumb. I've missed his touch.
"I deserve this. I hurt you. I hurt you so deeply. I deserve everything I have coming to me." He says softly. He goes to grab the microphone but I move it away. I walk over and hand it back over to Mr. Evans. I turn around to see Cam looking at me, sadly. What should I do? My heart is so full of so many different emotions but just one out weighs the rest and that's how I decide. I walk towards him and throw my arms around him. He wraps his arms around me waist and pulls me against him tightly. I close my eyes and take in a deep breath. I smile at his familiar scent. I missed him. God how much I missed him. Cam pulls away and kisses me gently, a feeling of sparks hits me as my stomach fills with butterflies. I hear people start to clap and some holler. My guess is that's the football team. I've missed him so much, all of him. We pull away and Cam rests his head on top of mine. Through all the hollering and clapping I hear Cam say,
"I love you."