Insane Doesn't Even Begin to Cover It...

Insane Doesn't Even Begin to Cover It... Chapter 21

Over the next few days, I can’t help but anticipate my first meeting with that woman… I don’t know who she is, I don’t know her background and for once she’s actually pretty. I hate being lectured by some ugly ass woman who thinks she knows freaking everything.

Caden seems to hate me now… I can’t really blame him. Getting denied a kiss? That must suck. I wouldn’t know. But he deserved it and he can be a baby all he wants. He needs to understand that things don’t work like that for me. Maybe when I’m dead, just not now.

…Necrophilia… ew…

At the moment, I’m just sitting outside of our room, in a sun spot from one of the small windows up at the top of the wall. It’s really cold inside for whatever reason, and this sun makes me feel a lot better.

I would be in the sun room area, but no one’s allowed in there because some guy tried to bash his brains in on one of the windows… he almost succeeded too. It was pretty gross. I saw the aftermath…

There was a huge puddle of blood from what was dripping down the glass and bloody handprints mixed in. It was gruesome… almost made me puke. I might seem like I’m so ‘strong’ or ‘dangerous’ but with some things, I’m a freaking scaredy cat. I can’t handle huge amounts of blood, for instance.

Apparently the guy that did it was sent to the hospital and is going to be there for a long time… I think that basically means that they were going to kill him. For some reason, whenever someone messes up here like that, like if they do something to try to hurt themselves or someone around them in a very bad way, they get sent off and most of them (if the offense is really serious) get killed.

At least that’s what I’ve assumed. I’ve been here since I was little and I’ve seen people come and go. Which is why I’ve never bothered to exactly get close to anyone. You never know who could go crazy one day and try to rip your brains out through your nostrils, like the Egyptians used to do.

Sure, I had a few friends when I was little. That was back when this place was better, not as strict. Everyone was nice to the kids, even the older patients. We all shared one room with all of these bunk beds and toys and went to group therapy sessions, things like that.

But now, no kids are sent here, and the rules are strict. It’s really retarded. We had our weekly meeting or whatever, the other day. It was basically the same thing. Going over the rules, and so on. Nothing interesting at all.

I hear someone coming towards me and I look up. Soon enough they come into view and I see that it’s Caden, along with Griffin. I raise an eyebrow, questioningly, but neither of them spare me so much as a glance.

Curious, I sit up and follow them into mine and Caden’s room. Surprisingly, Caden is gathering up whatever things he might’ve had in there, whatever books he might’ve had.

“I’m sure you’re going to like your new room Caden, it’s much more cozy. You will have it all to yourself, isn’t that nice?” Griffin says, extra loud. I’m sure he wanted me to hear that and I frown.

Caden’s changing rooms? Since fucking when? I wasn’t alerted to this… What the fuck is going on.

“Yes sir… that should be great.” Caden says in a monotone and my eyes widen a little bit. Sir? What the fuck is up with that?

I look at Caden and he just looks back blankly and then I see it. That glazed over, drugged look. He took his meds. What happened to him being independent and not taking any of their shit?

Letting them both walk out of the room, I slam the door behind them, showing just a little bit of anger. Falling down onto my bed, I stare up at the ceiling, almost wanting to cry for whatever reason.

I barely even knew Caden. Why am I getting upset over this? It makes no sense. I don’t get attached to people. It just doesn’t happen. I don’t give a fuck about anyone other than myself here.

But I guess… Caden…

Was working his way into my heart. As a friend. And now… he’s just like everyone else. Every last little fucking dazed sheep in this building.

Well… it was going to happen sometime…

I just didn’t think it was going to be this hard…

Sighing, I curl up and turn on my side. Staring blankly at the wall, I stay like that until the buzzer sounds and ‘lights out’ is heard over the speakers. I stay awake after that, for who knows how long, just thinking, wondering about everything that has happened here.

And how I’m going to fuck it all up.