see me again | michael clifford

11

izzy's pov

I cried myself to sleep last night.

in the morning, I didn't want to eat anything. so I didn't go down for breakfast. I just laid in my bed hugging the pillow.

there was a knock on the door. "izzy? it's Luke." the door was open so i waited for him to figure it out.

the door opened and Luke came in and kneeled down beside me.

"are you okay?" he asked. I shook my head.

"I mean, I can't say you don't deserve it." Luke said. his statement was true. I did deserve it. what i did with Ashton was wrong.

but the worst thing is, I'm scared of Ashton. I can't stop him. I couldn't tell him no. I don't know why.

"I'm the worst person." I sigh, tears falling.

"nah, izz. your one of the best mates I've had." Luke smiles. this just makes me cry harder. he's the sweetest person and I don't deserve friends like him.

kacey walks in and immediately hugs me. "I'm so sorry." she says.

"I deserve it." I tell her.

"no, you don't. I know my izzy, and she wouldn't do something like this for fun. I say that Ashton is forcing you into it." kacey says.

I don't want to tell them that I'm scared of Ashton. that will just make the matter worse.

"is that true?" Luke asked.

"no...I was just sad about Michael kissing girls on the cheek." I say. "Ashton comforted me."

"by kissing you?" kacey asked. I sighed. "look, I'm still gonna be your bestfriend even if you done something like this. and so is Luke and Calum." she says. Luke nods.

"we think it's best you stay away for Ashton." Luke says. I agree.

but what they don't realise is that he will come for me.

"come have some breakfast." kacey says. she's goes to my closet and pulls out a pair of high waisted black jeans and a grey cropped jumper.

"throw them on and meet us downstairs." and with that they walk out. i get up and throw on the clothes that kacey has laid out for me and head downstairs. I didn't know if I could face Michaels face without breaking into tears.

I entered the breakfast room and the 5 of them on the table stared at me as I walked over. I lowered my head and sat in my seat.

"are you nervous about tonight?" kacey asks the boys.

"nah." Luke smiles. "it's more excitement then nerves."

"what's been your favourite show of the tour so far?"

"London." Michael says suddenly. "I've had the best experiences there. with like, fans etc..." I knew what he was implying. he was trying to rub it in my face.

I glance over at him because I felt him looking at me. he quickly turns to his bowl. I try not to cry, and turn back round. I can feel everyone staring at me.

"we boys better go practise. are you two girls coming backstage tonight?" Calum asked. Before I could say no kacey stepped in. "Yes, yes we are."

I looked at her. She looked at me and smiled. I looked back down at my lap, trying not to make eye contact with any of the boys, especially Ashton. I could feel him staring at me.

I glanced up at him. He smiled when I looked at him. But it wasn't a sweet smile. It was a weird smile, a smile that I didn't smile back at.

We went to the venue at around 11am. The boys went out to practice. me and kacey stayed backstage in a little room and she had a long rant about Ashton and how she still thinks that he's threatening me. she was right, but I couldn't tell her.

the boys came in and jumped on the seats around us. "break time!" cal screamed. I walked out and said I was getting some water.

it was really just an excuse to not be there.

I went out to the vending machine outside and pressed my head against it, holding back tears.

I have not been hungry recently, and I didn't want to drink anything either.

"hey, izz..." a familiar voice said. almost too familiar. I turned round and Michael was standing quite far behind me. I cleared my throat. "oh, um hey." I managed. he walked a little closer to me.

"are you ok?"

his words were sweet but they hurt so much because I'm not fine. at all. (sneaky reference heheheh :) )

"yeah." I squeaked. Michael sighed.

"I'm sorr-"

"you have nothing to apologise about." I interrupted. "what I did is unforgivable and I hate myself for it. don't feel bad for me, Michael. move on..." a tear fell down my cheek. "find someone better than me." and with that I ran back to the rest of them, tears falling down my cheeks.

hey guys, sorry for late update. I'm back at school and have homework so I'll try and write a new part every 1-2 days :) thanks for reading ily all :)