'Cause I Like Him Too Much

Chapter Twenty-One

  "Please.", I shook George's arm. "Take me home now just like you said!" We were staying there in the port for hours, walking around I admit I enjoyed but I had to go home. I was told to go to the shop and buy my aunt some tools, and that was all.

 George looked at me with an insistent smile, "Don't you wanna stay here longer? We've lot to talk about."

 I rolled my eyes, "Oh Please. Aunt Anne  won't like me doing a thing like this without telling her." I pointed my  finger on the sky and said, "Look, it's already late in the afternoon and soon it'll be dark. And you know Aunt Anne, I gave my word that I won't do it again and now I'm starting to break that promise because you---"

 "Alright!", George barked. "Alright, I'll take you home this very instant. Now you're happy?"

 I just froze. I simply wasn't expecting that. This was the first time I pissed him off, or could be the first one I witnessed.

 George hoisted his bike and rode on it, using his foot, he made it stand. "Well?", he shrugged. "Don't you wanna go home now?"

 To react, to talk back  or not? I almost crumpled the paper bag I was holding as I sat behind George. George took the bag and put it inside the small basket attached to the head of the bike. I held on him tight and went on our way home, without talking to each other.

 When I saw Aunt Anne sitting with her old knitting tools, I knew I would be in trouble. Supposedly, she was waiting for me. I quietly gave her the bag and sat down with her, looking down as I began to imagine her, scolding me.

 "Where have you gone?", she gave me a glance. In that tone of hers, I knew she was disappointed. 

 I turned red and could not look directly at her. Should I tell her I was with George? "I--- I---"

 "I apologize, Ma'am.", George came inside without even bothering to knock. Surprised I was, I thought he already left. Aunt Anne told him to sit down, and so he did, facing Aunt Anne, he continued,  "I was the one who obliged Hannah to come with me for there is something I needed to tell her. I am sorry if she got back at this hour, Ms. Grant."

 Aunt Anne nodded and let out a smile. She turned to me and patted my arm and went back knitting, now, using the materials I brought her. 

 "Excuse me.", George stood up. Without even saying goodbye, to me, he left.

  I followed him. What he said, wasn't entirely the truth. He didn't tell that I was chased and got lost in the port, that was where he found me. Not telling the whole truth, well I guess he did right. Before he could jump and go without talking to me, I better talk to him. "What is it you want to tell me?", I asked.

 George didn't answer.

 "What is it George?!"

 He turned around and stared, with his eyes being meticulous, like he was asking if I really was interested to hear it.

 "Come on George!", I nagged. Now he was starting to be annoying. Or was he only paying back to me.

 George held my hand. He looked at me in a way trying to figure out how he was going to say it. I squeezed his hand and smiled. I noticed he wasn't excited compared before. "Whatever it is, you know I'd understand. Right George?"

 I didn't seem to lift his spirits up.

 "George?"

 George sighed. "We're not likely to stay here anymore. In two weeks, we'll be moving to London. Brian has prepared a penthouse for us there. It's nice I think."

 I bit my thumbnail, looking at him, I let him continue.

" I dunno, Hannah.", George held both of my arms. "Brian also said he'll arrange another trip to Hamburg and.."

 "And?"

 "And Edinburgh. In Scotland."

 "T-That's good." Is it? Anyway, that was all I could say. I had the funniest feeling I wasn't smiling anymore. I stepped backward and leaned against the door, for this time, I knew I heard it right.

 "Hannah..", George went to me closer, attempting to reach for my hand. I shook my head and squirmed a little, but I kept my stare.  "I thought you'll understand."

 "But I do..", I said to him, trying to put my smile back. Get a grip, Hannah! you know this day will come! I pulled George and gave him a tight embrace. I closed my eyes as I felt the soft texture of his sweater against my cheek. No. Don't cry! Don't!, I repeatedly told myself. 

 "Thank you, love.", George held my face and kissed me. 

 I kissed him back, but only a kiss. Just a single kiss, then I let go. I opened half of the door and waved at him. 

 "Hannah."

 "Yes?"

 "Please stay with me."

 "What?"

 "Please."

  "I--", I stirred. "I can't do that." Now I felt a tear or two running down from the side of my eye. To be honest, if I would be with him more that time, it would be harder to accept the fact that he was leaving. This inner voice of mine kept telling me to start letting go, should I listen to it now?

 "Hannah, we only got two weeks left.", George's eyes seemed moist-- with tears that wouldn't flow down. "And I,  I only got two weeks left  to spend with you."

 I had myself sitting down near the half-opened door, with my arms on my knees. "I'm sorry George.."

 "Tell me, Hannah.", George sounded stern, holding my shoulders while looking at me. "Do you love me?"

 "What?", finally the tears I kept were freed. 

 "Do you?"

 Breathing hard while crying, I nodded. "You know I do."

 George ran his hand from his face and to his scalp. "Then why are you doing this? Please don't make this any harder."

 I covered my face with my palms and sobbed. Didn't he think it was hard for me as well? Very hard? I replied no more, but sobbed again. I heard George sighed, and heard the clanking noise his bike was creating. I took a peek,  he was on his bike, he watched me for a second and he was gone riding. He left.

  I felt a heavy load of something, inside my chest. I came back inside. Not even thinking that Aunt Anne might wonder what happened, I just cried and cried. Pretending that nothing wouldn't do any good. I guess George didn't understand. I guess he was thinking his absence wouldn't affect me. Little he knew, how it hurt. He was my love. My life in this place kept revolving around him. When he was away, there was no single day that I wouldn't think of him. Being with him mattered a lot to me, in fact it's only what matters now. And now just imagining that he's going to be away, you know how painful it is. Just thinking of it. I just hope, he knew that. 

 I felt a hand on my back. It was Aunt Anne, pulling me in a soft hug. "It's hard, I know. Very hard for both of you, for a both young couple." She poured a piping hot tea into a cup and handed it to me.

 I held the cup and watched the smoke coming from it. I didn't answer, but just listened to what she was saying. The way Aunt Anne spoke, I knew she wanted to tell me something. A good advice perhaps?

 Aunt Anne never gave a sympathetic smile. Instead she said, "If you don't end it with George right away, things will be even harder than they seem. I don't want to see you like this, Hannah. Crying over this, crying over a man, both of you are very young to take things like this responsibly. Don't do this to yourself, dear. You'll get hurt."

  Was that a good advice? I had no idea, honestly.  I put away the tea, laid it on the table and went to my room. I sat on the bed, watching  the photograph of George and I, which was taken in the club by Ringo, framed, and was putted on my side table. I held the picture, looking at the wide dashing smile George got there, I whispered, "I love you George. Very much."