'Cause I Like Him Too Much

Chapter Forty-Five

  The soft breeze flashed through the opened window and there in the room it grazed, hemming me in with its chilly embrace as I was almost finished putting my things safely inside the valise. It wasn’t such a big surprise that it would be a lot easier for me to bundle everything up because all I had throughout my stay were clothes and some presents I received, which were surely meant to be fitted in only one, big bag. I closed its opening and looked around a bit, thinking if all that was mine was already taken care of. Supposing that I did, I started to do a little clean-up in the bedroom which wasn’t going to be the one I would lie down on after this. I peeped under the bed to check if it was clean and tidy as well. The empty dresser stood peacefully on the side with the small bedside table I moved to its right region and a wide space was left on the floor with nothing but an old carpet, covering a half-quarter of its width. I think that’s all, at least the whole room was going to be sane now. I bent my knees close to the edge of the bed, picking up the bag and the guitar which was carefully tucked inside its case, the six-stringed instrument was far more prepared for the journey than I was. I gripped on its handle, the same I held on my baggage. I made a small stagger to the door but it opened sooner before I could open it myself.

  Aunt Anne lurched inside with a gaunt appearance. She looked at me and produced a strained smirk and had her eyes roamed around the room.

  “You didn’t have to do it by yourself.”, she said. She glanced at my way, staring at the two objects I was holding and eventually, she slowly fixed her sight at me.

  I bowed my head. “I think it’s alright. I have used this place for months so I must maintain its good condition.”

  I heard her giggle. Still it was unnatural as her smile. In a soft voice she uttered, “Are you ready now?”

  “I..I…”, there was a pause. I do not know but I intended not to show to her the uncertainty and fear that were collaborating to bring me down so I nodded and put out a sturdy expression. “Yes I am.”

  “I can see.”, she said. I saw her pulling out something from the pocket of her apron. “But we don’t want you to forget this right?”

  She reached out for my hand and I let go of my load, putting it down. I stretched my hand a little in which I felt she placed a small and delicate item lying on my palm. When she pulled up her hand away, I saw it was the silver piece of jewelry sanely lying in the middle of my palm. I let a minute pass before I got fully convinced that it was the necklace George gave and was somewhat forgotten. I always thought that I have kept it earlier, put it somewhere with my things only I wasn’t sure where, and I must say that I may never had put it in safety. Aunt Anne proved it for she found the delicate thing that I never knew was once lost.

 The small pendant seemed to glimmer like a small star in high, distant horizon that enticed its watcher to yearn and reach for it. Two fingers from my other hand clutched on its chain, bringing the necklace closer to my face.

 “Thank you.”, I said.

 “No worries, dear.”, Aunt Anne replied. “Found it on the floor near the couch when I was cleaning. Good thing it’s still good, I know you’d be looking for it much.”

 I sulked a tad in her brief explanation knowing how clumsy I was to lost it but I was gratified she got it back now. She offered to tie the necklace around my neck and I consented although it felt awkward to feel it touching my skin again. And it succeeded in making me think of George.

 I thanked her for the second time as I got to hold on my suitcase but Aunt Anne insisted on carrying it for me so I just smiled and nodded, having my grip on the guitar instead and walked out the room. We were in the small hall leading to the living room and into its door, I walked silently with my head down, trying to remain calm though I knew later on, I would be facing another round of challenge again; worrying about what might happen next and how would I face whatever hardship alone, just thinking of these two was making me quiver shudder. I was determined to go even if I was lacking of capacity to carry on. I was afraid, I admit. Very afraid. But I mustn’t show it, I must pretend otherwise because all I wanted at this moment was to start again as if nothing ever happened. And to go was the only way I could find.