44~descision

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Ashley's pov
I paced back and forth in my bedroom. Waleed started to take a few baby steps. He held the boundary of the bed and walked towards me. "Mammma!mamma!" He giggled.
He started saying mama, I wished I could teach him to say baba, but why should I teach him something, that he doesn't have.
I sat on the the edge of the bed. Life had always brought me at tough points where I have to make important decisions. He smiled at Me, those eyes, filled with hope...
"Ya Allah...one thing for sure, no one can give him the love that ayan would give him, and maybe, just maybe, ayan would be able to give me the respect that no one else might..." I said to myself. I picked up the phone and dialled Ayan's number, but for some crazy reason, quickly cut the call. Why is this is not the right decision? I should pray istikhara ( a prayer that asks God to help make an important decision.) if the istikhara is positive, then I'll call ayan tomorrow. If not then I think I'm enough for my little angel.
"Right Waleed?" I asked.
"Aaaggghhuuuuuu...Aauuuhhh..." He giggled. Trying to take my phone from my hand, he easily makes calls to random ppl...
I laughed. He's so cute...bilkul apne Baap pa Gaya ha (just like his father.)

I prayed, put Waleed to bed, and decided to sleep...
Since waleed's death, I suffered from insomnia, and had to take a few prescribed tablets in order to sleep peacefully.
For the first time, I was scared to sleep. I have gave my decision to Allah and now it's all in his hands. I took a deep breath, took my medicines, and closed my eyes.

I kept running until I fell to the ground from the headache I was having. Someone picked me up, it was a young handsome man. For a moment I got really scared but then he backed away noticing my horrified face. " Can I help you?" The man picked me up and put me in his car, and drove on top speed...Now the car stopped and his hands were on my cheeks, wiping my tears. "Please don't cry, I can't see you that hopeless, asley!" Things were blacking out, the man was fading away... "I won't ever leave you, you are my responsibility and I won't stop loving you!"

I woke up, my head was hurting, it was hurting so much! Who was that person from my dream? Ahh--my head throbbed as I tried to remember...he sounded familiar, but I wasn't t able to see his face...I replayed the dream in my head...and with the memories of last night, came uncontrollable pain as well...I couldn't breath...for the First few weeks after waleed's death doctor gave me pain killers and blood pressure control tablets when I experienced nightmares... Those medicines were in the cupboard. I decided to get up but on my first step I fell on the ground and the lamp on the side table fell and the glass cut my ankle...the pain was uncontrollable...darkness was taking over me and I heard Waleed crying, shit!! I had to get up, for him...I crawled to the side of the bed. Due to the lack of air, my lungs started to dry out, and blood was seen as I coughed. At this point, Waleed was crying uncontrollably, and i was in so much pain...I couldn't do anything...I never felt so helpless before.

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Ayan's pov
My phone rang during the meeting. I just hate it, it gets on my nerves. I checked the callers ID. It was asley, well maybe I don't really hate it. Without even excusing myself, I got out of the meeting room and took the call.
As soon as I heard the other side, my heart clenched...all I could hear was Waleed crying. I Called out to asley but there was no response, just Waleed, and his loud cries...
Something was definitely not right!
"Watchman!!, tell the driver to start the car!" I ordered.
My heart was pounding...
Kis museebat ma hogi woh? Koi bhi nahi ha uske pass! (I wonder if she's in trouble? There is no one with her!)
The hospital I work in was quite far from Ashley's house...
"DRIVER!! GARI NAHI CHALANI ATI?!" I screamed.
"Sir, I'm trying my best sir, there is too much traffic sir." He replied.

God damn it... She needs me and I should be with her...

"GARI ROKO!!" (STOP THE CAR) I said
"Sir?" He asked.
"MAINE KAHA GAARI ROKO!" (I SAID STOP THE CAR) I yelled.
He stopped the car...
"Get out, take this money, and take a taxi back...I'll drive myself." I said handing the driver the money.
Without even wasting another minute, I rushed through the traffic, I never drove like this ever before...
I reached her house and dashed to the front door. It was locked! I could still hear the cries of Waleed. I took out a pocket knife and unlocked the main door without thinking twice...
I ran upstairs, and couldn't believe my eyes to what I saw.
"Ya Allah, what In the world happened?!?" I asked u self. I picked Waleed, his eyes were puffy from all the cryings...asley was on the ground, her ankle badly cut and blood spots on her lips. I quickly called the ambulance...
I'm about 8 minutes, the ambulance arrived!
Two men entered with a stretcher and placed asley on it...she looked almost lifeless.
I took Waleed with me to the hospital!
The whole time I kept wondering, what could have happened if I didn't receive a call? Just thinking about such a scenario made me shiver.
The doctors rushed asley into the emergency department. Waleed was crying from hunger, so a nurse provided me with a bottle of milk. He drank it and slept!
Wow, didn't know that I can handle little kids do good!

Soon a lady doctor arrived, and told me that asley is gaining consciousness. She directed me to her ward and I entered the room. Her hairs were covering part of her face but she managed to see me. She smiled as I entered, but I didn't smile back, I was angry, this girl needs to learn her lesson...
I placed Waleed into a small crib in the corner of the room.

"Thank you" she whispered.
"Thank you?" I asked, trying to control my anger.
"Tumhe kuch andaza ha k tumhare saath kya ho sakta tha?" (Do you have any idea about what could have happened to you?) I asked!
"Clearly you don't, cause if you did then you wouldn't be living alone asley, you are a women with a child, and believe me when I say that it's a hard life...it a hard life to live alone!" I said, my voice breaking in the middle because I just couldn't bear seeing her like this.
"Then make it easy for me....marry me?!" She whispered.

Assalam o alaikum!
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Until next time...stay blessed ❤️

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