In My Deceiving Heels [2] OLD VERSION

Chapter Thirty (Part 2)

"Kylie, breathe, my girl, breathe." Arianna's voice was drowned out by the sounds of my brother and my boyfriend yelling at each other in the other room. I was on the stairs with my hands in my hair, my eyes burning from all the tears that were flowing from them.

Heavy, heavy sobs came from my chest and every time I heard yelling, my heart broke a little more. It was never supposed to happen like this. They were never supposed to fight...not like this. It was like my world was splitting into two.

"Here." My best friend offered me a glass of water. I looked up at her through clouded eyes, taking the glass and then taking a small sip. I wasn't thirsty but she looked at me like drinking the water would somehow make her feel better.

It took some time for me to compose myself. I had to wait for my breathing to go from rigid hiccups to a smooth inhale and exhale. It wasn't 100% smooth, there was still some wavering in every breath I took but I had calmed down.

I sat there on the stairs, playing with my hands so that I could focus on one thing that wasn't all of this. I hadn't even noticed that everything had died down to just normal voices from the other room until Arianna put her hand on my knee. I looked up at her.

"What happened?" she asked so softly...so carefully.

"Connor..." I started but couldn't quite get the words out. Sitting up straight and running a hand through my hair, I tried to speak again after clearing my throat. "Connor found me and Mason kissing and he lost it then Mason lost it and Connor punched Mason then Mason hit Connor and-" saying what happened out loud brought a fresh wave of tears.

Arianna pulled me into her arms and rubbed my back gently, whispering some soothing words. "It's okay, it's not your fault." She cooed.

"But it is." I sobbed. I pulled back from her arms and wiped my eyes. "It is because if I hadn't gotten jealous of Connor and Kenzie I wouldn't have been so careless with Mason."

"Why were you jealous?" Arianna asked.

"You don't notice them, Arianna, but I do. They hold hands and kiss and hug and do all these things out in the open and I was jealous because I couldn't even look at Mason." I admitted.

Arianna sat on the step right next to me. She put her arm around me.

"I get it." She said. "But still, it's not your fault. This is nobody's fault."

"I just hated hiding so much. It was getting tiring...I couldn't anymore and I love him, Arianna, I really love him but I love Connor too, I mean he's my brother, he's my family but I just-" instead of being upset now I had become overly frustrated.

Mckenzie walked past the stairs as she went to get two ice packs. When she walked past again she threw me an apologetic smile. I looked down at my shoes and frowned.

"I need a drink." I sighed. It wasn't usual for me to turn to alcohol in moments of distress but this felt like a special case.

"Wine?" Arianna offered. I nodded. As she got up I held her hand.

"I'll get it."

I gingerly rose to my feet and went to the kitchen. The cellar was too far and I was in no mood to go hunting for wine so I took a bottle of vodka and filled a glass. I inspected the clear liquor before taking a small sip. It left a trail of fire as it went down my throat. I took a big gulp and winced.

I returned to Arianna but instead of sitting down next to her on the stairs I walked right past her.

"Where are you going?" she called after me. I didn't reply. My legs were carrying me to the last place I wanted to go.