{Hold} Basic high school Frerard plus a shit ton of Petekey

Thinking

~~Usually I put thoughts in italics but because this chapter is all in the different characters' heads as they ponder life and italics are annoying if over used imma just make it normal~~
- Lilly of le trash valley

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Pete

This is frustrating. I am frustrated. I CAN'T EVEN PROPERLY THINK ABOUT FRUIT-SNACKS! Mikey Way, you are taking my mind off of true heaven. Unless of course I consider the fact that his round doe brown eyes are the only heaven that will bless my soul. OOOOH! Nice one Pete. Self-five. The boy I want to be my boyfriend??? How is that a proper answer to who he is most sexually attracted to? I mean I know it's me. I'm not an idiot. Plus I'm super hot so who wouldn't want me? I'm hot right? Yeah, I totally am. Yeah. I am. ANNNYWAY, How do I get him to admit he likes me? He blushes like a rug burn covered in hot sauce around me. Hot sauce... HOT SAUCE FRUIT SNAC- wait no, Mikey. Focus Petester. Is him liking me something I invented because he's the most beautiful person I've ever seen? UGH, FUCKING GIVE ME A SIGN OR SOME SHIT. He's a bottom so maybe I should just ask him out? I mean I know he likes the D, and men without the D who are still completely valid because transphobia is far too rampant in the gay community. Along with extreme ageism....

Oh yeah, Mikey. Eh I'll just ask him to fuck me til he says yes... That'll work right? Fuck it I'm asking Gerard.

Gerard

The way he hugs me doesn't seem like the way a violent person hugs. He's so gentle and treats me with so much love and kindness... yet, Brian's busted lip, that was my boyfriend. He did it for me. That's what I tell myself but that makes it even worse somehow. What if.. What if he is like them? What if he turns on me? What if he was lying? What if my scars will disgust him? How could he be attracted to someone covered in horrendous scars? I need to talk to him eventually, I need to explain my thoughts. I need to explain my past, my body. I talk everyday, I talk all the time so why does this have to be so hard? I don't want to break our happiness... I love him. I'm far too young to understand love I suppose, and I haven't know him "long enough" but how else would I describe this? This school, the slurs, the bullying, my hatred of the world, my horrible life, the way I'm treated, the way I treated everyone. All of it, he makes it seem to leave. My bitterness couldn't defend itself against my beautiful boyfriend I suppose. That's what love is, right? How am I even supposed to know? Who can even help answer all these damn questions? I would ask mom but love is difficult for her to talk about, considering dad. I could ask Mikey? Who am I kidding he can't even admit to Pete that he has a mild crush.. Frank? No, I can't tell Frank I'm doubting us. Ray? Yeah. Ray can help, he's kind and generous and smart and collected. I'll ask Ray...

Mikey

I like Pete. He likes me? I think? I can't tell when he's joking... If I just say yes when he asked to have sex, what would happen? That's way too embarrassing. All of this romance shit is too... Much. Ray.. Well Ray was simple. He was caring and kind and smart, yet he still had a playful side. Even before Gerard had met him I knew him well. Been in band with him for two years. Started developing feeling for him about four months before Canada. I don't do falling quickly. I don't do falling for people like Pete. I don't do.. Lust. NOPE, PUT THAT THOUGHT FAR FAR AWAY. Why does this have to be so... New?

Frank

Gerard is so beautiful? What does he mean damaged? Self harm? Something to do with his hate of violence? Am I reading this wrong? Is it something emotional? Should I even be asking these questions? They aren't mine to know the answer to. It's not really any of my business and I would never make Gee uncomfortable on purpose. Of course I'm going to respect his boundaries. That's the only right thing to do but... I'm so curious. There are just so many questions... So many.

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~~ sorry this is short. I just wanted to see how something in this style panned out I suppose~~