A Sky Full of Diamonds (BoyxBoy) [COMPLETED]

Chapter 11 ~ Perfect Illusion

Thursday, September 5th, 2011.

7:10 PM.

"I'm sorry", Leo says

"Sorry? For what?", I ask

"You like me don't you?", he asks

"Eh... What... Ummm... I.. Ah.. I..", I said flustered.

"Your feelings aren't so subtle Josh", he says

"Ooh... I'm sorry", I reply embarrassingly

"I can't make you happy...", he says

"You already do....", I whisper

"I'm bad luck... There's nothing to gain from me", he warns

"I don't need to be happy, as long as you are", i reply.

"That isn't fair to you is it?", he says

He then moved in front of me, his eyes and mines connect.

"I come with hefty baggage, I'm not a happy person, my life is surrounded by sadness and pain, it's not something I want to put you through. Do you understand?", he says

"I understand", I slowly reply

I felt a pain in my chest when he said that. All I wanted to do now was prove him wrong.

"I don't wanna hurt you, Josh, you're a good guy and I don't wanna poison you", he says while getting up.

"I .. Understand", I reply slowly

"I know that face all too well. The face of disappointment... I've seen it too many times", he says

"I'm... I just", I stop

He then hugs me, he was so warm.

"I don't wanna hurt you, Josh, please understand", he says.

"Yes. It's okay", I reply

"Shall we head back now?", he asked.

As we voyaged back home I couldn't help but think about what he said. I guess this perfect illusion of mine was just that, a perfect illusion. We walked home in silence. Didn't whisper a word to each other. I started second-guessing my feelings. Maybe infatuation was mistaken for love.. It wasn't love?

We then arrived at our apartment building.

"I'm really sorry Josh. I really am", he pleaded.

"Oh. It's fine. I guess I misread the situation.. Thanks again for today. It really was a nice evening", I reply weakly.

"Goodnight Josh", he says

"Goodnight Leo", I reply as he walks away.

I headed back to my room and sank into depression. I felt like these past few days didn't happen. Leo was an easy guy to fall in love with, I guess I fell in love with the simple things that we went through in this little time. I thought it was fate meeting him, I thought this was supposed to be easy?

I fell asleep at 4 am that night overthinking and worrying. Eventually, my sadness overcame me and I fell asleep.