Learning to live

Being the mockingjay.

"Prim! No come back!"

"It's okay katniss! Ill get her" I reach for finnick but it's too late he follows her.

"I'm going to get finnick" Cinna chases finnick.

And then every single person I've loved follow in a line into each of their deaths.

Peeta grabs my shoulder and places a kiss onto my lips, following the rest of them.

"Peeta no please you can't leave me again, please come back, please peeta I love you, peeta" and he's gone and I sink to my knees trying to follow them but something keeps blocking me.

"Katniss, katniss, hey it's okay, it's okay it was just a nightmare, I'm here, it's okay" peeta wraps his arms around me, like he does whenever I have a nightmare, pressing his lips to my head.

"I'm sorry" is all I can get out while I sob into his shirt.

"It's okay come on" he stroked my hair like he always does after I have a nightmare.

"Come on Kat, it's your 21st birthday today, what do you want to do?"

I couldn't help but laugh he still has a way with words.

"Spend the day with you" I sniffed up as I spoke.

"Well I have a surprise for you" he had his mischievous face on, I knew he was up to something.

"Come on" he said pulling me out of the bed we shared.

Peeta never officially moved into my house it just happened, in the months that followed the end of the war we grew closer together. It started with dinner here and there, then he would come for lunch and then he would bring me breakfast. One day we went into the meadow  together his fingers skimmed mine, this would have been around 12 months after the end of the war. Being with him was easy natural I always knew it would be him. I knew after how easily i cared for him in our first games. A boy i barely knew. Then as soon as our second games came around i knew i would have gave my life for this boy. But that day in the meadow was when it all changed. First the thunder rumbled through trees and the skies flooded.

"we best get home , come on" Peeta laughed pulling me by the hand. 

We tried our best to beat the rain but with Peeta's leg it proved difficult, i didnt mind i was enjoying the playfulness of it all something we hadnt had the luxury of before. We made it home soaking wet. Peeta showered at my house and luckily he had spare clothes here he had been spending the night recently. Very innocently may i add just a cuddle here and there when my nightmares came.

We spent the afternoon watching the rain from the door way. I looked over to peeta his white blonde hair still as bright as ever even though it was octotber and we hadnt had much sun. I studied every inch of his face, his hands, the way his leg was bent and balancing on his prosthetic

"Peeta?" 

"hmm" he replied still looking into the flooding puddles. 

i took a deep breath, and asked him a question he had once asked me. 

"You love me. Real? or not real?"

he chuckled and stared at me for a while, i thought he might have been about to have a flash back and braced myself for what might come next. 

"Real" 

A smile escaped my lips as he made his way over to me.

.

Peeta led my down the stairs, making me promise to keep my eyes shut.

"Keep them closed!"

"I am! I am" I laughed.

"Okay, nearly there, right stay there keep them shut!" I could hear him rush into the kitchen and fumble around in the early morning light.

After a few minutes I could hear his heavy footsteps plod back, I heard him place something on the floor in front of me.

"Okay Kat open your eyes"

I removed my hands away from my face and stood in shock. Peeta was bent down on one knee, with a cake beside him;

"Katniss everdeen, will you marry me?"

I looked back down to peeta, kneeling shirtless looking as beautiful as ever.

"Yes, of course" a huge smile broke out on peeta's face, sort of relieved.

He pushed himself up trying to steady his prosthetic leg. He placed the ring on my finger before embracing me for a kiss.

"I knew you would say yes" he laughed

"How was you so sure" I asked him sarcastically.

"I made you cake, and cheese buns for breakfast" he laughed shoving a cheese bun in my mouth.

"Hmm good answer" I picked up a piece of cake and shoved it in peeta's face covering it.

He wiped the cake from his eyes, just as I was about to run away. He pulled me back over his lap shoving cake back in my face getting some in my hair. I rolled off him.

"Peeta you better run" but he was too strong for me anyway. He rolled me over and sat on top of me.

"I don't think you're going anywhere any time soon anyway" he laughed shoving more cake in my mouth.

"It looks so nice, doesn't it?" He asked sarcastically, and i was not expecting what he did next. He licked the cake from my lips.

"Eww peeta" I laughed

"What? I couldn't find your lips" he inched closer and I could feel every part of my body tingle, as it always did when he looked at me like that.

He crashed his lips into mine causing the hunger I felt in the quarter quell and so many more times after that. Soon enough I was pulling his boxers off. I could feel him smiling behind the kiss. He pulled his old t-shirt I slept in off me. And we did what we always did.

"Best birthday present ever" I said to peeta panting and laughing at the same time.

"I think I have to agree, even though it isn't my birthday for another 3month, I think I should get a present like this" he laughed turning to me.

"I love you peeta"

"I love you" he replied kissing me.

"Kat?"

"Mm"

"What would you say if i asked you for a baby?".

My stomach just dropped.