Never Be The Same {H.S}

chapter 41

This chapter is going to go with the song "Fragile" by Gnash. 

I jumped, hearing the front door open. My chest started rapidly moving up and down and I curled into myself, trying to calm down. Footsteps made their way to the bedroom and I backed up into the corner of the bathroom, my nails digging into my calves. I heard my name and my breathing became shallow when the person got closer to the bathroom. 

"Sam?" I heard and then Harry poked his head into the bathroom, his face falling at the sight of me. 

"Please don't." I choked out as he bent down in front of me. 

Harry sighed and plopped down next to me, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. I couldn't stop myself from flinching and he tugged me closer, putting his other arm under my knees. He lifted me up and into his lap, holding me against his chest as I shook. I could barely breathe but he just rubbed up and down my back, trying to calm me down. I couldn't even cry, I just felt numb and scared. 

I'm sorry you saw me shaking
Stay with me for a day
I've got no one to hold me
Cause I, I turn them all away

I don't wanna be alone
But I'm better on my own

Cause I'm fragile
God, I'm fragile  

~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hello?" I answered my phone, not paying attention to who was calling me. 

"Hey, babe." I heard Harry say and I couldn't help but smile a little to myself. "I'm about to head to the grocery. Got any requests?" He asked. 

"I don't care." I said quietly. 

"I was thinking we could do stir fry tonight. I found a new recipe for egg rolls if you wanted to try them out." He kind of rambled. 

"Yeah, that sounds good." I cut him off and he let out a deep breath. 

"Okay, I guess I'll see you at home." 

"I might be a little late but I'll let you know." 

Harry and I said our goodbyes and I hung up, looking at the painting that I was working on. I poured some paint out and mixed it with white, making sure I would have enough for the spot. I started painting the nose of the woman, smiling in content when it turned out to be good. This is going to be a long day. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"How was your day?" Harry asked as I mixed the vegetables in a bowl with some sauce to put in the egg roll. 

"It was alright. How was yours?" I asked and he smiled a little, adding an egg to the stir fry pan. 

"Good. I brought home a couple red velvet cupcakes." He said and I smiled a little, nodding. 

I put the vegetables in the wonton wrapper and brushed water on the edges to seal it before placing some in the pan to cook. Harry continued with the stir fry and we cooked in a comfortable silence, me trying not to burn the egg rolls. I put them on a plate with paper towels and grabbed two plates for us and some forks and soy sauce. Harry poured us both a glass of wine and we sat at the counter once all the food was ready. 

"Anything you wanna do tonight?" Harry asked and I shrugged, pushing my food around the plate and taking a small bite. 

"I think I'm just gonna take a shower and go to bed. I had a long day." I said and Harry frowned a bit, nodding. 

We finished dinner in a slightly uncomfortable silence and I momentarily closed my eyes, knowing it was my fault. I felt bad because I know how hard he is trying, but I can't just be fixed automatically. I got up to throw my food away and I washed my dishes off, feeling Harry come up next to me to do the same.