The Online Experience

April 11, 1996 (Part 3)

"Hi Sydney!" My old friends voice as bright and as full of life as ever in her quipped response. "What do you mean you expected my call yesterday? I think I'm missing something." The slightest laugh caused a sharp wavering in her usually beautiful voice. Breaking my gaze from his captivating eyes I moved over to the couch, taking a seat on the far right side and propping my feet up on the pale coffee table.

"I got a rather alarming call yesterday, a call from your friend." The silence pouring through the receiver from the other side of the line was deafening. I couldn't hear a sound on her end, no breathing sounds, no shifting, no background noise of any kind. I tried to picture her sitting in her monochromatic living room looking surprised, taken aback even at my comments, but I just couldn't manage it. What did she think would happen once she gave that woman my phone number? Meg was a lot of things, but stupid was never one of those things. "Apparently you're alright giving my contact info out to people I don't know." Finally a small huff of breath was heard through the line.

"Well I just thought you should know her." My skeptical eyebrow raised sharply at the phone and her haughty tone.

"And just why should I know her Meg?" As my words finished I heard his bare feet padding through the room behind the couch, into the kitchen.

"I thought that might put things into perspective for you Sydney. Get to know her, learn what you're really doing, how you're effecting people with your actions." It surprised me that there didn't appear to be a hint of judgement in her words, as though she truly felt she was somehow helping me. I could tell from her words she expected me to be a changed person, or at least the person she always thought I was. She thought I would see the error of my ways and be repentant for what I've done. It almost broke my heart to realize she didn't know me at all.

"I appreciate you trying to help Meg, but I don't need it and I would ask that you never give my information out to anyone again." My voice was calm and steady as I watched his still shirtless body come around the couch, carrying two steaming mugs,  and sitting one down on the coffee table for me before taking a seat next to me on the couch that had seen better days.

"So you've ended it?" The hope in her voice hurt more than I thought it might, but I didn't pause for even a minute to consider my respond.

"I'm happy Meg and that's what matters. I'm not destroying some true love," my eyes shifted, watching him out of the corner of my gaze  as his eyes fell to me at the change in my tone of voice, "we are happy as we are right now and there are no innocent people being hurt." placing an emphasis on the word innocent that even brought a little one-sided grin to his lips.

"Sydney, I don't want to break your heart, but when was the last time you saw him? Back in December when you visited? Because lots of things have changed since then. I don't want to see you get hurt." My lips parted, prepared to answer her concerns, when right on cue my thoughts and words were cut short.

"You want an omelet mama?" That resonating, sensual voice shaking me to my very core as I watched him stand and move back to the small, generic kitchen, me nodding in the affirmative.

"Sydney? Who was that?" There it was. The sharp, accusatory tone I had expected to hear when the call started. I wanted to grin at the bite in her words, shake off her tone, but there was something that made me unable to do just that.  Something about knowing for sure my old friend was going to judge me harshly for what was happening in my life.

"That's none of you're business Meg." my words came out before I gave any thought to what I wanted to say and my tone was casual.

"Oh my god Sydney," her voice loud, loud enough to have caught the attention of the small statured man now giving me a quizzical look from the kitchen, "is he with you now?" finishing her sentence in a hushed whisper. Drawing a deep breath I settled my squared off shoulders deeper into the welcoming comfort of the couch.

"Yes Meg, if you have to know he is and what is, or isn't, happening between him and I is none of your concern, none of your business. And I would appreciate if you wouldn't talk to other people about my life and. . . "

"You know I lost my boyfriend over this Sydney!" yelling her words in what was suddenly near hysterical anger. "You decide it's ok to fuck around with a married man and I get dumped! What the fuck is that about?! What you're doing effects more than just yourself!" Peeking over my shoulder I saw him standing at the counter, mixing eggs in a bowl, the broad expanse of his caramel colored chest peppered with dark hair still on full display.  Just the sight of him standing in my kitchen, in my home, in my little humble world made me want to smile and wrap my arms around him, never letting him out of my grasp. As though he felt my eyes on him, his head turned slightly, plush lips throwing a gentle, delicate smile in my direction that I was helpless against.

"Meg," holding his eyes as I waited to see any sign of displeasure with my words that I intended to land squarely back in Minneapolis, "I didn't cause the end of your relationship, your mouth did." a squeak of protest came from her but not quick enough to stop me. "What I as a consenting adult have chosen to do with another consenting adult in no way effects you or your life.  What ruined things for you was that you didn't think twice about who you were talking to or what you were talking about.  When I visited, you told me how particular your boyfriends boss was," his eyebrow cocked and his lips twisted in amusement, "how much he valued his privacy. You also mentioned how loyal your boyfriend was to him." his eyes leaving mine with an accepting shrug and a fully blown smile. "So with all of that in mind I don't see how you thought giving out my contact information would earn you any bonus points. You inserted yourself into a situation that has nothing to do with you."

"Sydney when my friend comes to me hurt. . ."

"I was your friend too Meg." the smell of omelets filled the apartment as I waited on the silent line for any reaction from her, instead the only sound I heard was the muffled clank of plates and utensils coming from the kitchen. A soft hand landed on my shoulder, he was standing perfectly still behind the couch, I leaned my head back and caught the slightly worried look in his hazel eyes.

"Breakfast is ready." his voice soft as he gave my shoulder a quick squeeze as he placed a chaste kiss on my forehead before walking over to the kitchen table.

"I'm going Meg. Keep my name out of your mouth." And with that I ended the call without allowing her even a moment to respond.  A loud rush of air passed over my lips as I made my way over to the table, taking the seat across from him and dug into my omelet. "You know that's probably all going to get back to Mayte." my voice soft as I focused on the slightly under seasoned egg dish in front of me. His hand reached across the table, talented fingers entwined with mine, calloused fingertips caressing my knuckles.

"And I don't give a shit if it does." the defiance in his voice brought my eyes up to his and that look only reinforced what I was coming to accept; he was somehow really in love with me.