Lauren's POV
It's been a week since my fight with Josh at the beach. I've been staying with Jen, but in a few days she's going to leave to go start filming for Mockingjay. She asked me if I wanted to go. I had asked her where she was filming at she said Georgia, where sam is from, and I told her there's no way I could go and I spent the next 2 days crying in her room. I haven't left her room all week. She stays in here with me at night. She didn't understand why I cried when she told me was filming in Georgia and I can't bring myself to tell her. She asked Jena to check on me while she's gone. I'm not as close to Jena as I am Jen but she agreed. I think of Josh most of the time. I haven't heard from him, spoken to him, or seen him. Sometimes I can hear Jen talking to him on the phone. She argues with him sometimes other times she talks to him quietly. I never pay attention long enough to hear what she says. I don't want to think about any of it. I just don't understand what I did wrong. Why did he get mad? Why did he leave me? He did. He just left me. Thinking about it I start to cry.
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Josh's POV
Jen told me that Lauren has been staying with her. She says she never leaves her room, so I know if I go over there I won't see Lauren. I don't want to. I keep telling myself that but I know it's not true. Jen is leaving in a few days for filming. They don't need me yet so I'll be staying here.
Instead of just walking in when I got to Jen's I hesitate on the doorstep and knock. She answers. She looks tired and stressed. She looks mad when she sees me but let's me in anyway.
"Why are you here?" She asks and sits on the couch. I set beside her.
"Sorry, I didn't know we weren't bestfriends anymore. I hope you and Lauren have a great friendship." I say.
"I'm sorry Josh. But if you had to see what I see then you wouldn't be too happy with yourself either." She says. I'm confused.
"What do you mean?" I ask.
"Do you love her at all Josh?"
"You know I do." I say getting mad.
"If you did you would know what I mean." She says.
"I do love her! It's her that doesn't love me! If she did she wouldn't act like I don't love her! Every time I tell her I love her she looks at me like she don't believe me! It pisses me off!" I yell.
"She's insecure Josh! She's been through hell with other relationships! She's never been in love before she don't know what to do! And she's never had someone love her back!"
I'm shocked speechless. I never even thought about any of that. How could I be so stupid?
"And you think she don't love you? Then come with me." She grabs my hand and we walk towards her room.
She opens the door and I see her. She's setting on the bed. Her hands holding her chest and she's crying. She looks miserable. Why? And I realize the answer. Me. I've hurt the girl I love. I walk toward her. I try to hold her but she comes too.
"Go away!" She screams pushing me away. She cries more.
"Baby I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." I say.
"You left me! Have I not lost enough people?! I trusted you! And you left me! Go away!" She starts sobbing. I start to walk toward her but Jen catches my arm.
"Josh. Don't." She says. It takes all the will in my body to turn away.
I get outside and fall to my knees. I scream and bury my face in my hands. And I cry. I never let anyone see me cry. I never cry at all. But here I am. Crying. And of course just my luck it starts to rain.
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Lauren's POV
After I yell at Josh Jen comes back in.
"Lauren. Go talk to him. He's crying in the yard." She says.
I think about it. This is the last shot. I can stay here and he'll leave. I'll never see him again. Never feel his arms around me. Never kiss him again. Never sing about him. Or I can go out there. We can talk it out. We can move on from this fight. Together. He's the first and only boy to love me this way. I remember what his mom told me. When he tells me why he loves me I do not question it. And I broke her rule. I questioned it. I can't give this up. I won't.
I run. Run to him. I don't stop when I see it's raining. I fall beside him and hold him in my arms.
"Look at me Josh." He looks up. Tears on his face. "I love you." I tell him"
"How could you. Look what I did to you." He says.
"it's my fault. Josh I'm sorry. I love you." I say. He starts to object but I kiss him to shut him up.
I push him back to where I'm on top of him. I don't pay attention to the rain. All I care about is him. I need him. I take his face in my hands and I kiss him. And after a few seconds he kisses me back. Wraps his arms around me pushing me up against him. We kiss until we're both gasping for air.
"I love you too." He says.
