My Past (Alphonse X reader)

Stop Staring!

'Don't look at me like that!' I stared back at all of them, embarrassment covering my face.

'No we're just shocked at how unfortunate your childhood was!' Ling spoke softly to me.

'The past hurts a bit doesn't it.' I glanced around the room, each person reflecting on something they wish they could change. 'I didn't even realise I knew that.'

With that tears fell into the floor, I hadn't even realised I was crying. My voice didn't crack, my body wasn't weak or shaking. My eyes just decided to cry, as if my brain started working on its own not telling me of its actions.

'How.' Yet again Mustang analysed the key moments.

'You know how I lost my memory.' Tears still dripping down my cheeks. 'I lost those memories too. I couldn't even remember my brother or sister, now I feel as if I've heard someone else's past, it feels like I was told a story.'

Silence returned to the room, eyes drilling into me, my body frozen.

'Stop staring!' My voice cut through the silence like a knife. 'It's not like it's hard for me to talk about.'

'Forgive us Lady/Lord (l/n).' Fu spoke with such kindness, a truly compassionate human.

'Please. To me you're more than equal, call me (y/n).' I felt a weird feeling as I spoke to Fu and Lan Fan, both of them displaying a small smile. 'I wish to be friends and aid each other if need be. Though I believe your Ling may need your protection more.'

'Now come on (y/n). Don't be getting smug with me.' He stuck his tongue out a me. 'Remember you owe me something, I could make you do anything.'

His last words were whispered in my ear, a red blush covered my face.

'Well played.' I crossed my arms as best I could, the automail hindering me slightly. 'Fine. I hope we can work together as comrades and become friends. Happy now.'

In seconds words such as Lady/lord and Prince had been thrown out the window. We spoke as if we were long term friends.

'Well. Now that you two are all buddy buddy.' Ed looked at us smugly. '(Y/n) do you have any clue how you're getting your memory back?'

'No. I'm sorry. It's almost like an extremely slow version of the truth, it's slowly sinking back in.' I looked at Al for a moment, sadness overwhelming me, I had no clue why. 'I'm sorry. I really am. If it's any consolation I wish I didn't have these memories.'

'Isn't it good you got them back?' Al spoke softly to me. 'I mean. Aren't you happy?'

'Happy is a different thing. The memories are something different. They're my trauma in reality.' I looked at him. So stupid that I couldn't even think of what I was saying. 'I wish I could give them back and never get them.'

'How could you say that.' Ed showed me what I was so blindly saying. 'All I've ever wanted is to get Al's body back and you're lucky enough to get the thing you lost back and you don't want it. I'd do anything for it. I'M STUCK PRAYING AND FIGHTING FOR IT! YOU GOT IT HANDED TO YOU AND YOU'RE COMPLAINING! COMPLAINING THAT THINGS JUST HAPPEN FOR YOU!'

'Ed I-' I was so stupid.

'YOU GOT SAVED BY US AND HAD TO DO NOTHING, YOU GOT SAVED BY ROY AND HAD TO DO NOTHING! HE GOT YOU ANYTHING YOU NEEDED AND STILL YOURE COMPLAINING.' Every word drilling into my brain but now it couldn't function. 'WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM EVERYONE? TELL ME! DO YOU WANT US TO REPLACE YOUR HAND, SHOULDER AND FOOT?! OH WAIT WE DID THAT FOR YOU!'

'Ed stop.' Ling stood in front of me, Ed batting him out of the way.

Lan Fan tried to stand up for Ling but he quietly calmed her down, Ed quickly moving towards me. Al stared in shock along with May Chang. Roy, I watched him fill with anger, an anger I had seen oh so well.

'YOU GOT A PLACE TO STAY, A LIFE, FRIENDS. WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT? LIFE SEEMS TO HAND YOU WHATEVER YOU WANT SO JUST TELL US AND IM SURE IT'LL HAPPEN.' He began to grab the collar of my clothes, pushing me to a wall like I'd done to Roy. 'YOU THINK EVERYTHING YOU DO DOESN'T AFFECT OTHERS? YOU'VE SHOUTED AT US WHEN ALL WE DO IS HELP AND COMFORT YOU WHEN YOU CRY! THINK ABOUT OTHERS for once.'

Ed's voice trailed off, he stared at me, eyes brimming with tears.

'Ed get off of her.' Roy stood up, prepared to do something.

'Don't. I deserve this.' I couldn't move, fear paralysing me. 'But do you really think that.'

'Come on Ed.' Ling placed his hand on Ed's guiding it away from my throat.

'Ed, you're trying to get my body back.' Al spoke softly. 'We're on a journey too though. We've made some amazing friends and memories so in a way I'm glad I lost my body.'

'Don't try to justify what I said.' I finally realised. 'I'm not saying that it isn't the case, but I am lucky. You've all been so nice to me and all I do is shout at you guys and cry. I'm really sorry. I'm in extreme debt to all of you, but not once haven't I believed that. I would give my life for any of you. The memories I may not want to have but I'm lucky to have them, I shouldn't complain. I'd give them any day to help any of you. I'd give everything to help one of you.'

'(Y/n). Your life is more important to us than any of that.' Al's hand made its way to my arm. 'If you gave your life I could never forgive myself. Just always be by our side.'

'I got to full of myself.' Ed stared awkwardly wiping tears off of his face. 'Sorry.'

'Don't apologise for things that you're right for saying.' I was angry no doubt about it, but the anger was for myself. 'I could never be angry about that.'

Once again they all stared...

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End of Chapter 22
(I did it! High five me. Sorry if it's a bit boring!)