My Past (Alphonse X reader)

Seriously

Why they looked at me with pity was beyond me. I didn't deserve the pity for my selfish character. I looked to Roy and we locked eye contact. I saw him sigh and stand up, obviously tired from everything, look at every set of eyes and sigh again.

'You know staring is rude,' Roy's voice was quiet but it had a certain firmness to it. 'People say stuff they had no intention of being mean or cruel, it's a fact of life. I've done it myself a few times, holding a grudge only makes you die sad.'

I could see in his eyes the pain be felt. He was reminiscing a moment he had with Hughes. Maybe he said something about not wanting to hear him talk about his kid, I'm sure that's something he would do, even when I was around he wouldn't stop swooning about his wife. At the time I hadn't even met his kid.

'I'm just a bit mad at myself is all.' Ed had his signature smile on. 'It's my job to get Al back to normal, your help means a lot though.'

'You were a kid Ed. Stop blaming yourself.' I yet again stared at the ceiling, this time stopping them from seeing my eyes as they filled with tears. 'I did the same for my family. I would have done it again in a heartbeat, just for the chance it would work.'

'(Y/n).' Al stood, I could only see him as human now, the armour disappeared. 'Don't do it again. Don't even say you would.'

'I only say it because as I child I would have. Death didn't even phase me, if I died saving the family I loved.' Tears clouded my eyes. 'I couldn't do it now. I couldn't be taken from the family I have now. I want to stay with all of you.'

'Well your debt to me will be repaid by helping Ed and Al.' Ling spoke confidently. 'Though that won't be complete compensation, I have all I want, but I would love to meet your family.'

'Ling.' I looked to him, a smirk was plastered onto his face. 'I couldn't, they wouldn't-'

'I want to meet them so I can show them the woman you've grown into.' Ling noticed the tears, he also saw the smile upon my face after he said those words. 'I could steal some books after I knock them out too. I'll take it as their debt.'

'Thank you Ling.' my smile forced out more tears, this time happy tears. 'I'll surely join you, maybe I can get a few swings in there too.'

Yet again I looked back at Al, his armour still gone. He walked over and hugged me, shock filled my body.

'We'll do this together, I won't let anything happen to you.' My heart skipped a beat, I felt Al's warmth and love, a feeling I missed. 'We'll kick their butts!'

We spoke a while longer, I didn't know what to think of, my mind running on it's own. A single thought popped into my head out of the blue.

'Roy, you said you had a problem in central.' I didn't expect a real answer. 'What is it?'

'Uh. Well I thought I got away with that one.' Roy rubbed his head with his hand. 'There's just a situation, we can talk about it some place else.'

'Fine.' I smirked at him. 'Don't forget.'

'I won't.' I could see him smile, a happiness I hadn't seen in a while. 'Take my word for it.'

'Al.' I stared at him for a second. 'I'm sorry if I ever say anything to offend you. Same with you Ed.'

'You're only human, don't worry about it!' Ed patted me on the shoulder, a bright smile on his face.

'Thanks.' I lost it again. My mind filled that in, I wanted to say more but yet again I stood in the bright darkness.

I wasn't afraid of it anymore, not now that I saw Al, but I couldn't see him that time. A white figure sat and talked to me instead.

'Hello there (y/n)!' It had a smile plastered on its face, not a nose or an eye could be found. 'You're wondering where your precious Alphonse is, aren't you? Worry not, he's still here, but he's not coming to see you and help you this time. Keep believing in this world, I dare you, but why wouldn't it be just your imagination reaching for that little humanity you see in Al? Why wouldn't you see your brother, or their Mother. That would seem more logical, since Al is outside of here. What will you believe? (Y/n).'

I snapped back, everyone talking again, they didn't notice the shock on my face or the tears filling my eyes.

'I'm just going to head for the bathroom, I'll be back in a sec!' I walked out quickly, hearing their conversation carry on.

I didn't want them to see me then, I couldn't keep crying in front of them. I looked into the bathroom mirror, my eyes had dark circles around them, my face was pale. I quickly fixed my hair best I could, I wanted to look normal enough, just so a fake smile would work. I wanted to lie to them for a bit, pretend nothing was happening so that they wouldn't worry, I hate seeing them worry the way they do. I grabbed tissue, wiping away the tears, then rinsing off my face lightly. With a brave face I walked out again, they were still talking, not a single sad face to be seen. May Chang was swooning over Al, jealousy building up inside me, Ed was talking with Ling and Lan Fan, Fu and Roy were talking and I was just alone in the doorway. I stared at May Chang for a short while, part of me wanted to tell Al that I liked him, but I still wasn't sure. He seemed to care for her, he probably knows her better too. I couldn't help but feel that he was being taken from me.

'Al,' I walked over to him, May Chang getting angry...

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End of Chapter 23
(Well, this story has more than 500 reads! When I saw that I may have fallen off my bed... sorry for the lack of posting I've been working on a new Fairy Tail story and Started a new Free! Fan-Fic too. I'll try harder to post more often! Thanks for all the support, comments, votes and reads, I can't thank you guys enough!)