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I've never seen Carl so angry with Rick. He wouldn't speak to him, wouldn't even look at him. He walked ahead of both of us. "Carl, slow down." Rick finally said. "Carl, stop!"

Carl stopped, not turning around. "We need to stay together. We gotta find a place with food, supplies. Hey." He set a hand on Carl's shoulder. He looked at Rick with pure hatred. "We're gonna be..." Rick stopped short, seeing the look in his eyes.

Carl started walking again and I walked with Rick. "Come on." I grabbed Rick's arm, slinging it over my shoulder, holding it there, while my other hand was under the wrap Faith was sleeping peacefully in.

"Thank you." Rick rasped.

"You don't need to thank me. We're family."

We came across a small building that read Joe & Joe Jr's BBQ Shack. "Wait outside, okay?" Rick looked to both myself and Carl. "Keep watch."

"You keep watch. You can barely stand. I'm not gonna let you go in there alone."

"Excuse me?" Rick asked.

"We've done this before. I'm gonna help you clear it. You should just let me do it myself." Carl raised his gun, waiting for Rick to open the door.

Realizing Carl was right, Rick opened the door and they went inside. I waited a minute before entering, making sure I didn't hear any snarling. I had to change Faith. I sure as hell wasn't gonna change her on the pavement. "Stay by the bar." Rick ordered. I nodded, setting my gun on the counter next the the bag and laid out a blanket, pulling Faith out of the wrap and laying her on it.

She gurgled happily, staring up at me with those bright blue eyes. Then I heard a different kind of gurgling. I picked her up, holding tightly. I heard crashing, then crunching, then a gunshot and a body falling to the floor. Then Rick and Carl started yelling at each other. I chose to ignore it. Faith started crying and I quieted her down, laying her back on the table.

I changed her quickly, something I'd gotten used to doing since nowhere is safe now, and set her back in the wrap. She tugged at my chest and I pulled my shirt out of the way, making sure she latched on. I picked up my gun and holstered it, grabbing the bag and sliding it into the crook of my elbow.

~*~

We were back to walking, Carl ahead, Rick and I staying together. "Do you think the others are alive?" I asked.

Rick sighed. "I don't know. We got out, maybe they did, too."

"Hey, hey." Rick tried to get Carl to stop, seeing as we were nearing a house. "Hey." Carl stopped in front of the house. "That one's as good as any." I stood outside as they cleared it.

Suddenly I heard Carl yelling. "Hey, asshole! Hey, shitface!"

"Watch your mouth!"

"Are you kidding me? If there's one of them down there, they would have come out."

I walked inside, closing the door. I walked upstairs and found a bed, laying a sleeping Faith on it and surrounding her with pillows, leaving the door cracked open. I went back downstairs and dug through my bag, smiling triumphantly when I found a suture kit.

I walked into the kitchen, where Rick was. "Let me stitch up your face. You look like hell."

~*~

The next morning I woke up to Faith crying. She had kept me up for three hours last night. I sighed and sat up, rubbing my eyes. I changed her diaper and put clean clothes on her. I pulled my shirt to the side and picked her up, chuckling as she latched on, eating as fast as possible. I patted her butt, swaying side to side. I wondered how long I could feed her like this. Without enough food...

I looked around, noticing that Carl was gone and Rick was still asleep. I nudged his foot, but he didn't move. I shook his shoulder. Nothing. I placed two fingers on his neck, sighing in relief when I felt a pulse. "He won't wake up." I turned around to see Carl taking off his flannel. "I already tried."

"Where were you?" I asked.

"I killed two walkers. They were at the door." He turned to Rick. "They were gonna get in, but I lured them away. I killed them. I saved you. I saved you. I didn't forget while you had us playing farmer. I still know how to survive. Lucky for us."

He was quiet for a moment, just staring at Rick. "I don't need you anymore." I looked at him in shock. "I don't need you to protect me anymore. I can take care of myself. You probably can't even protect me anyways. You couldn't protect Judith. You couldn't protect...."

He sighed, realizing he needed to keep his voice down. "Hershel or Glenn or Maggie. Michonne, Daryl...or mom."

I sighed. "Carl, that wasn't-" He glared at me and I closed my mouth, not wanting to make him more mad than he already was.

He looked back to his father. "You just wanted to plant vegetables. You just wanted to hide. He knew where we were and you didn't care! You just hid behind those fences and waited for... They're all gone now. Because of you! They counted on you! You were their leader!" Carl shook his head, sitting on the floor by Rick's feet. "But now...you're nothing."

Carl sat for a moment, then wiped his tears away and stood up, emptying the bag of food. "I'd be fine if you died." He left the house and I could do nothing but sit there in shock.

~*~

Carl was gone most of the day. I couldn't go looking for him. I couldn't leave Faith in the same house as Rick. He could....turn. So I stayed, playing with her and checking on Rick every so often, making sure he was still alive. It was dark when Carl came back. I had put Faith down for bed so I held a finger to my lips. He nodded, setting down a now full bag of food.

He sat down by Rick and dropped his head onto the couch. I heard Faith start crying. I sighed and walked upstairs. She didn't have a dirty diaper, so I started pacing in the bedroom, patting her back and bouncing her. When she finally stopped crying and fell asleep, I laid her back down and went downstairs, freezing at the sight before me.

Rick was on the ground, reaching weakly for Carl, who was aiming the Colt at him, but he didn't pull the trigger. Rick dropped his hand on Carl's foot and he dropped the gun, exposing his neck. I was frozen. I couldn't find it in me to attack Rick. He's the reason I'm alive. "I can't." Carl cried. "I was wrong. Just do it."

Rick lifted his head. "Carl..." I sighed in relief, holding a hand over my pounding heart. "Don't go outside. Stay safe."

Rick rolled onto his back, wheezing. Carl set Rick's head on his lap. "I'm scared." Carl whispered. I walked over slowly, crouching beside Carl. I set one hand on Rick's shoulder and the other on Carl's.

He pressed his forehead to Rick's, crying softly. I felt tears in my eyes. I rest my head on Carl's shoulder, feeling his arm wrap around me. "So am I, Carl. So am I."

~*~

"You shouldn't have risked it," Rick spoke. "going out there like that. It's dangerous."

"I was careful."

Rick nodded. "It was good that you found more food."

"I found even more." Carl said. "But I ate it."

"What was it?" Rick asked.

A small smiled made it's way onto Carl's face. "112 ounces of pudding." All three of us chuckled.

"I know...we'll never get things back to the way they used to be."

Faith started crying so I picked her up and walked into the kitchen, letting the two of them talk. I bounced her in my arms, smiling when she giggled, grabbing at my cheeks. "Lottie. Come here." Carl called from the other room.

I walked into the room, gasping when I saw Michonne standing there with a soft smile on her face.

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