Chapter 26 - I Can Explain : Part 1

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"What are you trying to ask me?" Siya finally asked. Annoyed with Divya's vague questions. Siya was in such a good mood this morning, she was practically beaming only to be greeted by Divya and bombarded with all these weird questions. Way to burst her happy bubble.

"I'm asking you about Abhi." Divya asked for the nth time.

"I already told you, Divy. I realized I loved him yesterday, we...we made some progress in the physical aspect of our relationship and I think he loves me." Siya said, giving a summary of all the in depth answers she had given Divya for the past one hour.

"But what made you think he loves you?" Divya asked again.

"Oh my god! Divya!!! I told you. It's the way he looked at me. I just know, okay?" Siya replied, exasperated with Divya's repetitive questions. She didn't understand what exactly Divya was looking for. She seemed to find all of Siya's answers inadequate.

"But he hasn't said anything about it?"

"Divya...I told you what happened yesterday. I told you he...he had a you-know-what. He might not have said anything but his actions spoke volumes."

"But he didn't say the words?"

"No he didn't! So what, neither did I! You know I would never have done those things if I wasn't in love with him. I felt it Divy, after what happened between us last night."

"So you guys went second base with each other..." Divya said impatiently.

"Divya!" Siya was started to regret filling Divya in on the details of what passed between her and Abhi. But she needed to tell someone, it was her first time being in a relationship, and it had progressed so far. She had felt like she needed some girl advice or assurance. She had a few questions about these things. And Divy was the only person she could ask.

"It's not that big a deal you know? Siya, it's different for men and women."

A deep dread started forming in the pit of Siya's stomach.
"What are you trying to say Divya? Are you intentionally trying to hurt me?"

Did Divya mean that what she felt, what she thought she saw in Abhi's eyes, was just a figment of her imagination. That he was just physically attracted to her and nothing else?

"No Siya. I'm sorry for being so cynical. I don't want to kill your buzz. All I am saying is, don't get ahead of yourself.  Don't assume things. Just ask him about his feelings before going any further okay?"

"Weren't you the one who told me that Abhi 'obviously' had feelings for me?" Siya couldn't understand. Just a few weeks back Divya had pointed out to her that Abhi might have feels for Siya. And now she was the one to make Siya doubt her conviction. What had brought on such a change in Divya's perspective?

"Siya, I know I said that. It's just that we won't know what he is thinking unless you ask him and he clearly tells you."

Divya said, walking into the house. Leaving Siya alone on the balcony save for her thoughts.

What was going on with Divya? Did she know something Siya didn't?

What if Abhi didn't reciprocate her feelings? What if last night was purely physical for him, while it completely reached through her soul? And all this time he hadn't changed his original belief of never falling in love? That all the romance was born out of pure physically necessity rather than true love?

No! Siya knew this couldn't be it. She knew what passed between them was way beyond simple lust. She had felt it!

*

"Siya, I can't find my black jacket. Do you happen to know if..." The words died on Abhi's lips as he saw her.

She was leaning towards the mirror on her dresser, and applying what seemed to be finishing touches of wine red lipstick.

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