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24. Forced to be his

120 8 0

od sweet_poison99

od sweet_poison99

Author- lovesshivika

See the difference. In the second, I have done nothing but use commas and full stop. Nothing else but it makes a huge difference.

I don't really have much to say about it. It was plainly boring. No thrill. It was unreadable. I don't think I would have even considering reading it if not for a review.

You want the reader to stick around. When you don't use punctuation, it annoys readers like me and they walk away. I hope you edit it because this story highly needs an edit.

When you change perspectives at least let the reader know who's perspective it is. When you changed the perspective from Anika to Shivaay in first chapter, I was suddenly wondering. Why the hell is Anika smoking suddenly?! And then I realized it was Shivaay's POV.

So don't confuse the readers. Mention who's perspective it is.

Tip–

«» Take care of capitalization.
«» Use at least full stop and commas.
«»Don't write chatting languages.
«»Take care of typos.

That's pretty much it.