Chapter nineteen ~ complicated

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    When Taehyung reached home Yoonji opened the door as always. He mumbled a quick ‘hi’ and rushed to his room. When he climbed the stairs he stopped at his tracs. He sensed something wasn’t right, he knew he had left his door closed and the servants respected his privacy and never opened his door. He slowly walked and stopped once again, in front of his room. Jimin was nowhere to be seen. In fact, there were no traces of him, no proof that he has even been there. He felt a sense of emptiness in his heart all of a sudden. He gazed slowly, his eyes searching for something, anything left by Jimin. He saw a flash of white on his bed. He rushed to it, it was a note! He sunk down on his bed and beginned reading.

    Taehyungie, I know this seems sudden and abrupt. I’m sorry for leaving without saying goodbye. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to leave if I talked to you in person. I think we can both agree that we need some time alone, to think what we’re going to do next. Please understand that I’m not (I will never) break up with you. Let’s just take a night off to clear our minds. I hope you feel the same way about this. I love you.

    Taehyung reread the letter over and over till he memorised it. He was sad and disappointed that Jimin left, he needed him at that moment, that day hadn’t been his best. But he understood and appreciated what he did.

    He layed on his bed. He wondered how he managed to get there. A week ago if you told him that he was going to be looking at the ceiling like a dumb teenager, thinking about the cute boy who wouldn’t stay away from Jungkook, he would have told you that you were crazy. But he found himself thinking about Jimin a lot lately; his cute little nose, the way he laughed, his eye-smile, his crooked teeth that made him even more beautiful, the way he slightly raised his head when talking to him because of the difference… he could turn from cute to sexy in a matter of seconds. He had the look that could make Tae scream like a fangirl and make him want to wet his pants. It was a wonder how he managed to love him that much and still manage to f up in a week.

    He sighed loudly, his mind started to drift away. He thought about Jungkook and the kiss they shared. It felt so good, so free, so right at the time. Now he despised himself for doing it. He hated himself for feeling good. Why couldn’t it be easy?! Why couldn’t he love Jimin and not have any feelings for anyone else? Why did it have to be complicated? He had hoped that he wouldn’t feel anything before he kissed Jungkook. Yet now he found himself longing to kiss him again. He hit his head on the bed for thinking that.

    He knew deep down Jimin needed someone better. Even though what Jimin said today (about liking Jungkook) had confused him even more, he was sure that Jimin deserved someone who loved him with all his heart. His head was about to explode when he heard the notification sound. He got up and looked at his phone. His mom had sent him a message.

Jean: Are you free to talk now?

Jean:

    It was a picture of three young boys around 20s, they seemed like they were on a vacation and they seemed like they were having fun

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    It was a picture of three young boys around 20s, they seemed like they were on a vacation and they seemed like they were having fun. Tae thought for a second, why would his mom sent that? Then he figured that it was the three boys his mom had told him about. It seemed too weird at the time, how could three people date at the same time? He had completely ruled it out without thinking. He was sure he loved both Jimin and Jungkook equally in different ways. And now he knew that Jimin felt something for Jungkook too. He started to wonder. How would he feel if three of them dated? How did Jungkook feel about this? He noticed that he had never asked Jungkook’s opinion. He felt even worse about himself. He didn’t know how Jungkook felt about him and Jimin dating, how he felt about the kiss. He had never asked. He had been too selfish to ask. He promised himself he would talk to Jungkook the first thing tomorrow morning.

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