Through It All, Your Ferret ~ A Dramione Fanfiction (Complete)

Chapter 37 Like an Infant

Every morning, fine every time I opened up my eyes since I don't know if it is morning or whenever, I wake up and struggle to get my body to move more and more. I work on focusing more on the shadows and lights, and talking. Anything. Everything. I am starting over, and part of me doesn't know where to start. I felt like an infant; I couldn't feed myself, I couldn't communicate - but even infants can cry when they need something.

I needed to see him. Feel him. Be there for him when he wakes up. I need to hold him and cry with him. He is going through an inordinate amount of pain, different from what I am going through, but we can survive together.

We were meant to. I fully believe it.

I open my eyes and move not just my fingers in a spastic twitching motion, but a controlled grasp. Now for my hands and wrists, which I can bend and turn slightly. That much is harder. My elbows flex a minutia, but it is huge for me.

My feet and legs I work the same way, but they are more responsive; I can bend my knees and roll my hips outward.

I work at scooting my backside up the bed so that I am in a more seated position, instead of flat on my back. It also will help me work my core to remain upright.

My eyes still see blurs, but they are not solely light and dark. There are some hues to it. It looks like I am trying to see through a 100 year old glass, opaque and deformed, where the light doesn't hit it just right where you can see what you are looking at, rather an obscure blur of a possible image which leaves you guessing at what it really is. Muggles call it matrixing, trying to make sense of shapes that aren't really. I'm just doing it in reverse - the shapes are real I am just trying to figure out what they are and only sometimes my best guess is close to being right.

I work on trying to make sounds, something beyond a guttural growl. I want to be able to say my kids' names, I want to say his name. But first I work on the first real word that every child abuses: 'no'. I practice it over and over until I have it where I can be understood, before moving on to 'yes' and any other single syllable word I can.

While I am working on these vocalizations, I work on grabbing small objects - fine motor skills. I want to be able to write. If I can't talk, I need to be able to write my feelings, wants, and needs. I know my fingers will get frustrated if I try to type on a muggle keyboard, but that is also an option that I need to work on. But with all the pure blooded or even half blooded wizards who haven't recently lived in the Muggle world, how am I going to explain a keyboard to them?

I hear and see the door opening and a figure walk in; red hair doesn't help much considering it is short so I know it isn't Ginny.

"Hey Sis," still not helping much, but I eliminate Arthur and Percy from the mix. It isn't Bill's voice and if Charlie, well what is he doing back already from his trip back to Romania to check on the dragons? "Now we need to talk about our ongoing ferret problem." Hi George. "He isn't getting much better. I know you're trying, and you've made some stellar progress recently, but I have an idea. Hear me out. You go to his room. Just for a few minutes a day. It will do you both a world of good. Then soon you'll be holding hands," my hand twitches excitedly at the idea. "Great you get the picture I see. Alright, are you ready to get out of this bed?"

"Esss" I slur. I sound like a snake. Ugh if I start speaking parseltongue after this, I will kill Lucius myself, and if he's already dead - since I have no clue what day it is - I will have him resurrected and then kill him again.

"Damn Hermione Granger is back!" he says excitedly. "Good. Now let's get you to that ferret."

I can see the door opening and shutting and hear cheers from the other side. It flies open and a sea of red fills my clouded vision. I blink forcibly a couple of times trying to focus but it still is useless.