The HU$TLE {FIN}

20

B.

Spring break came and went entirely too fast. I've been feeling down and out ever since I found out about-

"Ma!" Karim yelled.

"Son!"

He came and opened my door. "Is it okay if I head out?"

I nodded. "Where are you going?"

"To Amari's House. We might go to the court and get something to eat."

"Okay. Have fun. No girls."

"Of course not, mom. See you."

After he left, I decided to go back to sleep seeing that I was extra tired anyway.

I was awakened by my cell phone. I groaned and checked who was calling. Solo.

"Yes, sister Knowles?"

She giggled. "Let's hang out."

"I'm tired, thu." I whined.

"Yeah that's great. Unlock the door, I'm outside."

"Shit." I mumbled and she laughed before she hung up.

I found the energy to get up and let her in. "Girl... you look like boo boo."

"Yeah thanks. I'm tired and I don't feel too great."

"Clearly." She said touching my forehead. "You need to take some Robitussin, Theraflu, NyQuil, or some shit like that."

"I'll be fine. What you wanna do?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I just didn't want to be home by myself."

"Get a man."

"Funny you mentioned that..."

"Why?"

"Because I got a man. We've been on like 6 dates and he's incredible. He's so sweet and down to earth. He may just be the one!"

"I hope he is the one. You definitely deserve some love."

"So do you. Have you heard from Jay?"

"Nope and I don't want to. I told him to hit me up when he was doing legal shit. I don't have time to be getting arrested off some shit that he was doing."

"Mhm... you miss him. That's why you look like that."

"Girl, no. Well yeah I miss him a little bit, but I'm not stressing over no dude. I'm too fly for that." I joked.

"It's okay to tell me the truth."

"I did. I miss him of course. I haven't seen or heard from him in a while."

"How does that make you feel?"

"Sad, bitch."

"And hostile. I see. I'll change the subject." She laughed. "Where's Karim?"

"I don't know. Probably doing hoodrat stuff with his friends."

"Oh my God. You allow that?"

I chuckled. "I'm playing, solo. My son is not a hoodrat."

"His Mama is."

"Yo Mama is."

"I don't care." She shrugged. "Let's do something fun."

"I don't feel like it, Solange. We just came back from vacation. How about we stay in the house all day?"

She sucked her teeth. "You're boring."

"No. I'm tired. Why don't you go hang out with your new man?"

"I don't want to seem annoying or anything yet."

"You might as well let him know now... he is going to be pissed when he finds out how annoying you truly are." I said seriously.

"Oh shut up! I am not that annoying."

"The devil is a liar."

We laughed and joked for a little while before I was ready to put her out.

I love my sister, but I see her ass everyday. Then I just came back from a vacation with her. I needed a break and some time to myself.

After Solange left, I had time to myself to think about everything that was going on.

I'm a grown ass woman and no one ever warned me about these tough make it or break it decisions I have to make.

Maybe if I talked to someone about it it'd be easier, but I also feel like I need to do this on my own. It's ultimately up to me.

I plugged my phone up next to my bed before running down stairs to get some fruit. I decided on a few strawberries and a banana.

We always had fruit in this house because I liked for my son and I to eat healthily. Of course we eat junk sometimes, me more than him, but I try to promote healthy eating as much as I can. Especially as of recently.

I sat in my room for most of the day, reading Mary Higgins Clark's 'The Sleeping Beauty Killer' on my kindle. I love reading thriller/mystery books. Stuff that keeps me on the edge of my seat.

My phone started ringing causing me to groan and roll my eyes. Someone always had to bother me.

I looked at my phone and it was unknown number was calling me I usually don't answer, but something told me to. "Hello?"

"You have a collect call from..." my heart sank. Karim better not have gotten arrested. I'm going to whoop his ass.

"Shawn carter." I heard his voice say, causing me to laugh hysterically.

I accepted the charges and waited. "Hello? Bey?"

"Shawn, why are you calling me from jail?"

"I needed to talk to you."

"Talk, you ain't got much time."

"I tried to get out and stop... I swear I did. I don't know how I ended up in here. All of us got busted with the coke at my house."

"Wow..."

"Did you tell?" I busted out laughing again.

"Hell no and I'm offended that you'd even ask me that."

"I'm sorry. No one else knew. Why would my boys snitch and get themselves locked up?"

"I have bigger problems to worry about, but you just helped me come to my decision..."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm pregnant, Shawn." It went quiet.

"Deadass?"

"Yeah... But I'm not keeping it. I can't. Especially not with you in jail serving years. I'm not going to go through this alone."

"Bey, wait. Karim can help. Your sister. Your mom."

"You have one minute remaining." The voice said.

"None of them are my child's father. I raised a child alone before and the pain and turmoil is too much for me."

"...I'll be out in a few years."

"That's a long time."

"Baby, please."

"My mind is made up, Jay. I cannot keep this baby."