30.) Nightmare

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Dorian's POV

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Dorian's POV

After I left the house, I blacked out. 

The next morning, I woke up in the woods while a deer just looked at me. I furrowed my eyebrows wondering why I was outside when I looked down at myself. I was naked and covered in blood.

Inhaling the different scents in the air, I smelt humans. I quickly got up and looked all around to where they could be. Then I stopped when I saw three bodies lying on the ground by a tree. I had killed them in a fit of rage.

I cursed at myself for my stupidity then dragged the three bodies for a mile until a pack of wolves came running towards me. "Bury them and be discreet about it."

My hands dripped with the bright blood reminding me of my sins. I walked until I heard water from a lake. The slight splashing let me know that nobody was out here. I got in rubbing the blood off of my hands.

If Flora had seen and heard of what I've done, she'd make sure I stay away from her. My rage was something that made changing easier since the anger is my only focus. It makes the tearing of my skin easier to come off.

I hastily scrubbed as I smelled Roman approaching. He probably smelt the blood by now knowing that it wasn't mine that had been shed. I looked up, meeting his piercing stare. "Pleasant to make your acquaintance, now what do you want?"

"I have to tell the others what you've done."

My body went rigid. The muscles of my body strained and my hands were in fists. "No, you won't. I will not allow it."

"Make the right choice."

By the look on Romans, I knew he wasn't going to back down. On their own accord, my claws extended. Roman looked down doing the same shaking his head at me but I was already too far gone.

I snarled while spearing him to the ground. I lifted my hand pulling back as I was about to slash him. Once I swung at him, he caught my hand and growled.

"What would Flora think if she saw what you are about to do? She'd think you a monster. Do you want her to believe you are one? Do you want your kids to hate you for scaring her so much?"

I instantly let him go. I backed up staring at him breathing hard. He was right, I didn't want her to fear me. My kids needed to look up to me, not look down upon me in pity. Roman laid on the ground staring up at me, watching my every move.

Another week had passed and I still wasn't allowed to go near Flora and it nearly kills me every time. More than two people were always guarding her. They told me countless times that if there's ever danger then I'd be allowed near her.

So far I've kept my cool by secretly watching her from afar. It was the only way to appease my nagging conscience. She seemed happy with the many visitors she gets from different packs.

They all wanted to see the mother of the three lycan pups. How upsetting that they'll only be two. Flora scolded me already for not believing my unborn daughter will make it but I stand by what I said.

She's already getting her hopes up high, but when the moment comes where the baby doesn't breath, she'll be devastated. I can't believe and hope when there is none.

From what I've seen her mother comes by more often. Now that she knows everything, she wants to be by Flora's side.

Every day that passed reminded me of her due date nearing. She knew she'd have to give birth early. I was excited but nervous at the same time. There was a fifty-fifty chance that Flora could live or die. These babies were going to be spoiled and looked after, but they needed their mother.

She'd be the only one to teach them the morals of human ways while I teach them how to survive and fight. They'd be good at both once they get older. The thought made me smile. In the time away from Flora, I'd gone out into the human areas.

Women flocked to me but it wasn't their attention I craved. The night was filled with alcohol although nothing could fill the hole in my chest. I was dwelling in my own misery. When I got home I fell into bed, going into a deep sleep.

There were loud shrieks coming from outside. I looked all around trying to decipher which direction the noise was coming from. It was cold outside, the wind drowned out the direction the noise was coming from.

There were wailing sounds of a baby that made my heart beat faster. The screaming sounded again, this time I focused where it was coming from. It was straight ahead. The sight I was met with was something of a nightmare.

There was a trail of blood on the floor that looked to be dragged deeper into the woods. I ran again following the trail, the branches from the trees scratched my face, giving me cuts that I chose to ignore. I stopped when Flora came into view.

She was lying on the ground with a pool of blood surrounding her. Her white gown was drenched in crimson blood. I was on my knees holding her in my arms. There was a baby right by her side that she cradled in one hand weakly. The baby was lying motionlessly. Flora slowly fluttered her eyes open.

'They...took...babies. Dead.' she whispered then her once beautiful brown eyes faded out. She became even paler than before. I put my ear on her chest trying to hear her heart but heard nothing.

The tears were pouring out of my eyes profusely. My mind was going haywire. She couldn't be dead. She survived this long, she just couldn't be dead. I lightly tapped her cheeks trying to make the color appear on her skin but got nothing in return.

I bent down and kissed her lips, slowly, savoring the last of us. My hands shook when I sat up. I looked at the baby and picked it up. I released a shaky breath realizing it was my baby girl. She was wrapped in a torn part of Flora's nightgown.

I placed two of my fingers over her heart to hear nothing. She was too cold and pale. She was gone too. She survived the birth but froze to death out here.

I was too late.

It was all my fault.

If I had been there, they'd be alive. My two girls were gone...forever. My boys...were taken. They were probably dead too.

I had nothing.

I shot out of bed, scrambling out of the covers. My body was drenched in sweat. My breathing was erratic.

My only thought was my family. I had to see them. See her.

I quickly ran outside leaving the door wide open, running to the house. Once I was in view, I was stopped by Marcus.

"What are you doing here?"

"I need to see her," I said walking past him. He grabbed a hold of my arm. He took one look into my eyes and knew it was urgent. "I need to see her," I repeated.

I went into the house passing by all the guys. They didn't stop me when I went upstairs. I skipped some of the steps trying to get there faster. The only time I was quiet was when I opened the door to her room.

I could hear her soft breathing. My mind was only on her and the babies. She was breathing softly as she slept on her side. I brushed my finger over her trailing it up her cheek and by her ear. She moved slightly but didn't wake up.

My heart rate slowed down now that I knew she was fine. I placed my hand on her stomach hearing three strong heartbeats. Though one of theirs was a little slower. That one was my baby girl's, I knew it.

I kneeled on the floor. Holding onto her belly while resting my head against her, was like holding my entire future in my hands. She was always my future and will continue to be.

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