25. No Tomorrow

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RACHEL

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RACHEL

That evening, Elliot and I stepped out of the cab and faced a beautiful, big, white house, which I grew up and spent my whole life in. My home. A home filled with tons of beautiful memories I would cherish forever, but they were shadowed by one single haunting memory. A memory that ruined me, awakened the demons I never thought existed in my mind, created an everlasting war and teared me apart. And in the end, all that was left was a broken, disgusting, fucked up and selfish monster. Nothing more, nothing less.

"Is it as pretty on the inside as it is on the outside?" Elliot's enchanted voice, pulled me out of my thoughts and I glanced at him and his fascinated expression.

Amused, I smiled. "Yep."

We walked towards the door and after every step I took, my pulse quickened, my heart beat louder and my palms felt sweaty. It was when we stood before a small staircase that lead up to the front door, I swallowed hard. My feet were frozen on the old grey carpet I had wiped my shoes on before stepping inside my whole life. Not anymore though.

"You okay?" Elliot asked, gently.

"Is it okay to say no?" I asked, pressing out a smile as tears dwelled up in my eyes and I glanced sideways to meet his gaze.

He moved his hand to take mine, his reply a balm to my soul. "Yeah."

"Then...no," I whispered. His grip tightened around my hand as our fingers interlaced with each other.

My other hand was shaking badly as I used my key to unlock the door. When I slowly opened the door and we entered, pitch darkness consumed us. All the lights were switched off, leading me to have small heart attack. I was scared. Scared of being in my own house.

When the lights suddenly switched on, I flinched, but Elliot rubbed a comforting hand on my back, calming me down. My eyes closed, my pulse and heartbeat was raging on, never planning to slow down.

"Rachel, it's okay," Elliot assured, soothingly.

Breathing heavily, I sucked air into my lungs through gritted teeth, forcing myself to calm down. Very carefully, I lifted my eyelids and when the white painted walls came to sight, the fear started to thaw. I liked the ceiling at school. It was white like the walls of my once upon a time called home. The white ceiling reminded me of home.

Slowly and gently, I walked into the living room and tears started to rush down my cheeks when I noticed that the whole house was empty. And so were the white walls. All the beautiful moments captured in photo frames were gone, leaving the white walls plain and empty. The whole house was plain and empty.

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