When Shadows find Light (SOTAM FF) ✔️

Keep Me In Your Mind - Tam's POV

I watched them hug my sister from a distance.

Emotions are weird, and they have been, since the dawn of time. This was a fact I'd known ever since the beginning – ever since Choralmere, whenever I'd overhear the silent whispers of my parents, arguing about the "burden" of having twins – whenever my heart would drop to my toes as I was forced to live with the fact that my innocent sister and I would forever be haunted by the one singular thing we didn't have control over. Sure, we'd grow up to dye the tips of our hair silver, to give each other knowing looks of rebellion and wordlessly agree on having each others' backs no matter what we did, but there was something terrible about knowing that this was the one thing we couldn't change.

Ever since those very same whispers eventually turned into loud, tense arguments that befell our ears, things had already twisted into a thick tendrils of hate – a defense mechanism of sorts that allowed me to focus my energy on snapping back towards my parents in order not to dwell on the other, deeper emotions I wasn't ready to confront just yet. 

And although I'd done fine for the most part, Linh was a different case. She was a strong girl, of course– but she was more in tune with her emotions than I was, although I hated to admit it. She allowed herself to cry. To be vulnerable, even if it was only around me for the most part.

In other words, today was just another one of those days.

It wasn't often that I'd indulge in any sort of physical affection, but I knew there were things that just had to be done that I couldn't ignore just for the sake of my own pride or ego. I'd long since settled next to Linh, who was quietly sniffling as she sat, the corners of her eyes tinged pink and slightly swollen. I wordlessly looped my arm around her, sitting silently as I offered her my support. 

The moment lasted for a good while before I looked up, processing the crowd of our friends gathered around, looking towards Linh with varying expressions of their faces. I cleared my throat and looked up, giving a tense smile to them, as if signifying that it was okay to move, to talk– that my sister was strong enough to not shatter at the drop of a pin.

Sophie was the first to notice, and she ran into me, hugging me. I laughed, surprising everyone. Keefe smirked. "So, I guess lots has happened between Foster and Bangs Boy here, huh?" he asked, his voice holding slight approval.

Surprisingly, I was grateful for the topic change (though I'd never admit it), and Linh seemed to be as well, her shoulders relaxing ever so slightly as the spotlight was taken off of her and her vulnerability. 

Guess he got over it. Great. I looked him in the eyes, prepared to snap back a witty retort that was gathered on the tip of my tongue, but I bit it back after seeing the faraway glance rested in his eyes. "Yes. Much has happened indeed, Keefe." I said, using his name for once. He looked surprised, and so did everyone else.

Soon, Keefe smiled. Not smirked. He smiled at me. "See? Even Bangs Boy can't resist using my name." he teased. I scowled, but good-naturedly. Fitz was next to Linh, and her eyes were twinkling brightly. But her back was still slightly slumped and she still looked tired. But that was okay. After all, this wasn't like some silly story where you just had one happy moment and everything was fixed. No. Not at all.

There was something comforting about the way they'd all gathered around my sister. Something comforting about the fact that I didn't have to be the only one she had to lean on anymore. 

I smiled at her, but had to restrain from glaring daggers into Fitz, who was now currently smiling and chatting with her. He was holding her hand gently, muttering quietly to her and grinning a little as her lips twitched slightly into the upwards curve of a tiny smile. 

I sighed at the sight. As long as she's happy, I thought to myself, though my jaw clenched. 

I felt a hand tap my shoulder. I turned around, facing Sophie. She smiled shyly and waved. I relaxed. "Oh. Hi." I looked to the left and saw Keefe and Biana talking good-naturedly, the boy's icy blue eyes twinkling as he gave Biana a cheeky smirk. Dex was just sitting there, fiddling with an object and ignorant to everything happening, but still had the faraway look of thoughtfulness in his eyes.

Sophie sighed. "Did you ever notice- the, uh..."

"Linh?"

"Um... yeah."

I shook my head. "No. Although I deeply regret not even noticing how down she looked sometimes. I knew she had her down days sometimes, but I never realized that it was that bad. I never realized that she was hurting inside. But... she will get better. I know she will. Because we'll be there to help her," I began firmly. 

"You'll be there to help her. Sencen- er, Keefe will be there to help her. Biana will be there to help her. Uh, Fitz will be there to help her. Dex will be there to help her. And I'll be there to help her. And I'll make sure that she'll be happy, no matter what." I realized that I had raised my voice and that everyone was staring at me with appreciation. Linh was smiling brightly. I looked at the ground, trying to shrink into the ground. Monologues weren't my thing, and I wasn't really used to all the attention.

"Wow, T- er, Bangs Boy, you have some embarrassed emotions coming off you," a familiar voice retorted playfully.

"Shut up."

"Keefe, nobody cares." That was Biana's voice.

"They should. I'm Keefe."

Sophie snorted. Keefe turned to her with a smirk and a sparkle in his eye. "What?" he asked. Dex also snorted. "Um, you, that's what." he retorted. Fitz toyed with the hem of his shirt. "Guys, I have to tell you something." His tone of voice was one of warning, but almost comically so.

"What?" we all asked.

"Keefe should really get some vanity controlling classes." he joked.

"No I don't!" Keefe protested. I almost snorted, eliciting a snicker from Dex. "Maybe I do, then." he said grudgingly. We all shared a laugh. Even Linh, which made me happy. Sophie grabbed my hand. "Tam? she asked. "Yeah?"

"Did you hear what I said to Linh earlier?" she asked. 

"Yeah." I sighed, cracking the knuckles of my hand with quiet little pops. "Why?"

"Promise me," she began adamantly, "That you won't let yourself bottle up everything like you've been doing in the past. That you'll let us in when things aren't going well," she whispered quietly. Her expression was unreadable, but her beautiful brown eyes glimmered with the slightest hint of worry as they focused on me. "It's okay to feel down, you know?" she continued when I didn't respond. "It's okay to be vulnerable. That doesn't mean you're weak, or scared. If anything, you'd be very strong to admit those kinds of things."

Without warning, I grabbed her wrist and pulled her into a tight, appreciative hug, my chin resting atop her head. My cheeks felt faintly hot, but I forced myself not to comment on it even as it burned hotter when I saw the others' surprised glances trained on us.

"Thanks," I murmured quietly, tightening my embrace a little. "That means a lot."

Sophie was silent for a moment before she laughed, the sound warm and melodic as she giggled against my chest. "It's nothing," she said, her voice muffled by the cloth of my tunic. "You work fast, y'know."

I allowed myself to chuckle quietly, the tips of my ears flaming hot. I was glad my hair covered it for the most part. "Yeah," I muttered, "I tend to do so." 

I allowed myself to savor the moment before it was shattered by the familiar snickers of a certain blonde-haired boy, followed by loud, obnoxious kissy noises that echoed in the vast sky. 

I rolled my eyes.

helpp