Author Games: Panem Entangled

When In Panem | Scores, Notes & Sponsorships

Alright, before we dive in we'd like to give y'all a little background knowledge on how we got each of your scores. Each of us graded to the nearest .5 out of 12, then averaged our three scores to get your final score.

For notes, we decided to give feedback only to those of you who submitted an entry (even if you resubmitted you still count as one of these) before the original deadline. If you used any sort of extension, you weren't given notes.

Bonuses:

First Entry [+1] For turning in a few days early, we'd like to give Hansel Chae a little appreciation.

District 1 Male: Morgan Ruidhir

Score: 10.7

Feedback: EXTENSION

District 1 Female: Mizar Hayes

Score: 6.8

Feedback: The fact that you scored lower than you may like has less so to do with the writing, but more so the length of the entry. It was an extremely short read, and there didn't seem to be much going on, and it really felt like it was over in a flash. To expand on your thoughts, really try to describe the surroundings and Mizar's thoughts and emotions, instead of simply saying what she sees and does. Also, more substance. It felt like this entire entry was just Mizar and her short dialogue with Etton. We'd recommend showing a bit more training and expanding more on Mizar and the careers. And interaction between those two, either after, before or during her interaction with Etton, would've been an excellent addition. It was a nice read, however, and we're excited to see the rise of Mizar's alliance with Etton.

District 2 Male: Nereus Ramsay

Score: 10.5

Feedback: EXTENSION

District 2 Female: Diana Sawyer

Score: 9

Feedback: EXTENSION

District 3 Male: Winston "Buzz" Douglas

Score: 9.3

Feedback: The description in this entry was lovely, and the writing was strong with a nice balance. The entry flowed well, and it was a lovely read. However, when it came to character, there was a bit of disagreement among the hosts. Some felt it was fine, but others felt it as if they couldn't really connect to the character. We think that the reason for this might've been that there was generally a bit more telling in this entry, so it might help to find some sort of balance there to make sure every reader can really connect to Buzz as a character. Altogether, it was a nice read.

District 3 Female: Waverly Easton

Score: 8.5

Feedback: EXTENSION

District 4 Male: Fabian Los Flores

Score: 9.2

Feedback: We thought that the memory was a nice touch, and it set up the entry really well with a nice little introduction. It also provided us some insight on his character, and it's just a really good introduction to Fabian. However, we felt that the capsizing part was a bit overdone, and maybe, slightly unnecessary? We understand that it was used to expand on what Fabian doesn't want to see in the arena, and we appreciate that, but on the other hand, it felt slightly out of place. Additionally, the transition into the interview was a bit abrupt, and we just felt that it didn't connect as smoothly as we'd have liked. It felt like two different entries kind of smashed into one. The description was nice, and it was balanced well with the other elements. Overall, it was a pleasant read.