His Unthinkable

Plays N My Mind Like A Movie

Ugh Im so rude! I know you might be wondering how and why I'm here.

My name is Queen. Im 17 years of age. Ill be turning 18 years old in four months. Not like it truly matters. My birthday has not been celebrated since i came here. Well i get more birthday hits from my nurse. If that counts.

I was brought here 9years ago. At the tender age of 8 and a half I was charged with murder.

I've been living in hell since they dragged me to this shit hole. They give zero fucks about us here. I wouldn't wish my worse enemy to this life. My depression seeps out sometimes when I sit and think about what I've gone through. I think sometimes this will be where my death will be. Maybe the shock wave will set me off and I catch on fire. Burning me and everything around me. I would die with a beautiful smile on my face. As the rest in the room screams and cries for mercy. Im starting to think maybe I am a sick person.

Anyway im off topic once again.

It was a late afternoon. Mama was in her rocking chair knitting some booties for my soon to be baby brother. I got to miss school to go to the doctor with my parents to find out what we were having. I remember jumping up for joy when I found out it was a boy and not a girl. I was some what on the tom boy side. I would teach him how fish, hunting all the things I enjoyed. Just as papa teached me I would to him. Then again I still had a little girly in me. Me and Mama would cook and bake for hours in the hot kitchen. We would talk, laugh and tell each others secrets. The memories of the time I spent with mama and papa are my best. But I always felt my mama was hiding something. Not like a little white lie but something major. Even at a young age I knew. But I was a child, and as a child I stayed in my place.

Bam! Bam! Bam!

Papa went to the door opening it wide enough for my uncle to walk in. He came in holding flowers and a cake. But looking back at it the look on his face wasn't right. Like his eyes looked almost crazed, it reminds me of people I'm surrounded with now.

"Hello Charles"

"Hey Missy how are you today?"

"I'm doing good"

Strange thing he's never once asked about my brother. My looks behind him like she's waiting for someone.

"Where's Betty? Haven't seen her in awhile"

He squint's his eyes a tad bit. Like remembering something. But as quick as it comes it leaves exchanged with a fake smile on his face.

"She wasn't feeling well, I told her I would bring her a plate"

"Is it the pregnancy, you know the smallest things makes me sick with Jr"

He grits his teeth slightly but the smile returns.

"Oh! Your having a boy Congratulations!"

"Oh yes we found out this morning and thank you. Maybe I should go over to your house and bring her some of my tea. It'll put her stomach to ease"

"No! "

He clears his throat fixing his collar on his shirt.

"I mean she's resting, she doesn't get to do that allot any more. I'll take the tea to her when I leave"

"Ok well I'm going to go finish up dinner"

My uncle and papa sit back with a beer talking about work and sports. Something a 9 year old doesn't want to hear about. So continue playing with my dolls

Mama walks out rubbing her hands with the rag in her hand

" well dinner is almost done. You all go wash up while me and Queen set everything up"

"You don't have to tell me twice"

My papa kisses my mama then her small baby bump before walking off to wash his hands. We made a pot roast that's been cooking since last night veggies our cooked at the bottom. The side was white rice and corn bread. I set the table then helped place everything on the table. We all sat down saying grace then digging in.

"Dam that was good, I haven't eaten like that in so long"

Uncle Charles slides the chair out slouching and patting his stomach

"Nonsense, I know Betty throws down in the kitchen"

Uncle Charles scuffs but smiles

"Alright baby girl it's time for you to get ready for bed"

"Awe but papa! I wanted some cake"

He looks at me trying his best to give me a hard stare but he can't hold it. Not for his little monkey.

"Alright after cake, bath then straight to bed. You have school tomorrow"

"Yes sir"

Finishing every bite of the chocolate goodness and then half of papas with out him noticeing I'm off to a bath. Mama comes to help me. I get to play with my toys until the water runs cold and my fingers get to looking like prunes

When I'm finished with my bubble bath I put on a t shirt and bed fluffy shorts with the matching bunny slippers.

Walking downstairs I hear my mama and Uncle talking in hush voices. I'm not really able to understand it all.

"Charles he can never know I had two. It doesn't matter anyway there gone. I'm happy now, don't take that away from me. No more drug business just family. Be happy for me Charles"

Before he can respond my papa comes from out side

"It's about to rain the thunder just sounded"

I finish walking down the stairs

"Good night everybody"

I walk kissing mama on her cheek then hug daddy

"Oh you just going to forget about to little ol me?"

"Never"

I run jumping on my uncle giving him a hug before walking back to my room and getting in bed. I pass out hearing the rain begin to fall. The rain brings me peace and sweet dreams.

I stir awake feeling like the middle of the night. The rain is still going heavy. We probably won't have school tomorrow. If it's been raining this long it's probably flooding out the door.

Hearing a whimpering sound. I get up letting my feet touch the cold hardwood floor that brings shivers to my body. Quickly putting my slippers on. Getting off the bed rubbing the crust out my eyes as I walk down the stairs quietly. Just in case my parents are still up I don't want to get in to any trouble.

I get to the bottom of the stairs peeping around the corner. The sight almost made me scream out. But I held it letting the tears drop.

This was the night my entire world went to hell.

This was the night I lost everything I knew