Reviews [CLOSED]

The Battle

Reviewed by: alysha40025201

Author: SquirticusMaximus

Cover (8/10)

Your cover has a really nice idea, and is very unique. It may just be my device, but it seems blurry? There are probably ways to fix that, so I would just check up on that. Some more words of advice, I would make the author tag a light gray instead of the color that you have it, as is, I can't really read it. Also, I can't tell what's on the right side of the cover, you could always ask someone who does covers for their advice on fixing those sorts of things.

Summary (7/10)

I really found it great that you used a poem to act as your summary, it's something that you don't see often if ever. In the last stanza, you might want to remove the first “has". Just looking at your poetry, has me itching to get inside. One thing that you could do to make it stronger, is to make it rhyme in certain parts. I know rhyming isn't a mandatory part of writing, but I feel that it would help this piece. Another thing I noticed is that you “broke character" when you started describing what the book was about, and because the starting poem is sort of short, it would help if you stay in mood that you created. FYI, it honestly kinda scared me to see my name there.

Chapter Review: (9/10)

The poetry you used in this chapter was powerful, and really made the reader think. 2 critiques and then I will get to the good. 1) if in your first stanza the order is light then dark, then your second stanza should follow the same rules. 2) In the line that says “Good and Evil are Light and Dark.” the good isn't italicized. Onto the good, or light (I am SO funny), like I said before, this is powerful and thought-provoking, it made me reconsider the smallest and most natural things such as the sun and the moon.

Activity of the Writer (10/10)

I started by scrolling through your activity feed, and I can see that you are active with comments and votes, good job you are in no way a silent reader, and that's a good thing. Next, your activity feed conversations are almost as if you are speaking to family, just so welcoming and fun. Finally, I looked at your comment section, and you are always so humble, kind and always seeking new feedback. 10 out of 10 for sure.

Plot (5/10)

The pieces themselves are nice, beautiful. One thing to note is that they don't really follow a plot, but they do all follow a common theme. You could introduce a plot by having all of the pieces coming from a certain character’s point of view.

Overall (9/10)

Rock on and keep writing, you are really good at it.