My mommy ❤️

Saddness

Jade
I woke up this morning and looked over to Leigh, she was sleeping peacefully, I felt the urge to pee, like everyone does in the morning. I began to get out of bed but then I saw a blanket on the floor, I looked down and saw Perrie sleeping, she had her Paci in and sammy's ear was against her nose. She looked so peaceful but I do wonder how she got there. I still need to pee but I didn't want to wake her so I shuffled off the bottom of the bed. "Jadey babe." I heard Leigh mumble. "Hmm." I replied. "What you doing?" She asked. "Going to the toilet." I replied. "Why from the bottom?" She asked groggily. "Pez is at the side." I laughed. "Oh right, yeah." She replied and rolled over she cuddled into my pillow and sighed out. Leigh was always adorable in the mornings. I quickly emptied my bladder in the bathroom and went back into the bedroom. I heard Perrie whimpering and moving around in the floor. I think she was having a nightmare. I didn't really understand how to help her so I just led in bed and looked down at her. "Is she crying?" I heard Leigh whisper. "I don't know I think she's having a bad dream." I replied and began stroking Perries cheek, she was whimpering loudly and squirming a lot. Her eyes quickly opened and she looked up at me. "Mommy." She cried out and reached her hands up, she also started crying loudly. I helped her sit up and pulled her into my knee. I rocked her for a minute trying to calm her. Once she was slightly calmer, she moved herself in the middle of me and Leigh and just stared at the ceiling. "What did you dream about sweet?" Leigh asked her. "The care home." She whispered. We have never talked about her care home. I knew she grew up in one though. "It wasn't nice there." She said and looked at me with sad eyes. I stroked her cheek and kissed her forehead. "I've always wet the bed, and I would get bullied for it but I wasn't allowed to wear any protection or anything so I had to wash my own sheets every morning. And sometimes they would lock the bathrooms so I was forced to wet myself and they took pictures and things." She said, she hid her face in her hands and started crying. Leigh mouthed "Care home?" To me. I nodded and hugged Perrie tighter. She was sobbing. "Shhh it's okay, you're not there now." I whispered and rubbed her back, Leigh did the same.

After Perrie had calmed down, we went to get breakfast. "I was thinking we could go on a walk today? It's wonderful weather for it." I said as I rubbed Perrie's back. She was cuddling Leigh I the sofa. "Do we have to?" Perrie whispered. "I would like to." I said. "I want to go to, we haven't for a while." Leigh said and kissed Perries head. "Okay but I don't want to." Perrie said and sat up. "Me and Leigh will go and get ready and then we'll go to yours and get you ready." I said. She nodded.

After me and Leigh were ready, we got Pez in the back of the car and began towards her house. "You don't need to come in, I won't be a minute." She said sadly and got out. I was going to go after her but Leigh took hold of my hand, "give her space babe." She smiled. I nodded and sat back in my seat properly. After about 10 minutes, I was getting nervous. "I'm going in." I said and got out of the car. "Okay." She said and took her phone out. I walked into the house. "Perrie babe?" I asked and walked through to her bedroom where I'm guessing she'd be. She was sat on her bed crying into her hands. I went to sit down next to her. I didn't hug her or anything I just sat next to her watching her cry, she clearly needed to get it out. "Let it out baby." I sighed and hugged her. I rested my head on her back and she rested her arms on my knees. She was crying loudly. "It's okay." I whispered and rubbed her back softly. Im not sure she heard me though.

20 more minutes passed before poor Perrie became calm again, she had situated herself on my knee and I was cradling her as she cried into my chest. "Good girl for calming down." I said and stroked her hair. She nodded and sniffed, I reached for some tissue in the changing table and she blew her nose softly. I wiped her eyes with another piece as well. "Do you want to tell me where all this sudden sadness came from sweet?" I asked and cuddled her close to me again. She sighed out loud. "Today's the anniversary of my parents death." She mumbled and let a couple more tears fall down her face. "Is that why you were sad yesterday as well?" I asked. She nodded sadly and cuddled me more. "They were such good parents, they looked after me with so much care and consideration. They always knew when something was wrong and they were always there. My mum gave the best hugs and my dad made the best jokes. I miss them so much." She cried out and started sobbing again. "Oh Pezza, I think we'll skip the walk today." I whispered and kissed her head. "Thank you." She whispered. I quickly texted Leigh telling her to come in. She joined us a couple of minutes later.
"My parents are dead to Pez." Leigh whispered and took hold of her hand. I looked at Leigh shocked that she said that, she never ever ever talks about it. "They are?" Perrie asked sadly. "Yeah, a couple of years ago I was in the car with them. I came out to them about me being with Jade and well... my dad crashed. He died instantly my mum died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital, I had minor scratches." She said sadly, she blinked away the tears and looked down. Perrie hugged her. "They were great parents, just a little shocked when I came out. I know they would accept me fully though if they had time to think." She said. I got off the bed and went to hug her as well. "Thanks girls." She laughed slightly. I kissed her cheek. That's the first time she's talked about it since it happened. I'm proud of her.

"Anyway, who wants Disney and popcorn, let's hype up the mood." I smiled they both nodded and walked downstairs hand in hand. My two favourite people.

+++
Let's clear things up lol.
First of all, Perrie was 12 when her parents died and she entered the care system.
I know she went on holiday with her 'mum' but it was the person at the care home not her mum who is dead. She calls her mum because they were close.
If you have any more confusion... comment it so I can clear it up lol.