forty one,

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When Jeno thinks about Donghyuck, he thinks about childish wonder and a beautiful pair of eyes. When Jeno thinks of Donghyuck, he thinks of summer, honeysuckles and constellations. Jeno sees freckles right below Donghyuck's eyes, dancing across the bridge of his nose disappearing off to the side. Donghyuck's freckles are like little stars, ones which suit Donghyuck perfectly; cause Donghyuck shines a bit too bright, but Jeno doesn't care in the slightest. Donghyuck can shine as brightly as he wants, Jeno thinks he's beautiful when he does.

When Jeno looks at Jaemin, he thinks about falling in love and the prettiest smile. When Jeno thinks of Jaemin, he thinks of chubby cheeks, chocolates and flowers. Jaemin always had a thing for flowers, whether it be plucking them straight from the ground and putting them behind his ear, or sketching them out tastefully when he was bored. Jaemin smelt of flowers too, always a combination between lavenders and lotuses, the most enticing and intoxicating scent Jeno has ever breathed in. The flowers suit him so perfectly; because Jaemin was sweet and Jaemin was delicate, but Jeno doesn't care in the slightest. Jaemin can be whoever he wants, that's when Jeno thinks he loves Jaemin the most.

When Jeno looks at Mark, he thinks about warm blankets and big, palpitating hearts. When Jeno thinks of Mark, he thinks of lazy mornings, soft detergent and kisses. Mark was always so calm, was always so comforting. In any situation, Mark seemed to be able to calm anyone down. He was warm and his cuddles were the best, while his clothes smelt like home and his kisses were comforting. Mark's detergent suits him perfectly; because fresh linens were really all Mark was about. Calm, and soft and amazing, but Jeno doesn't care in the slightest. It's when Mark breaks down and let's him hold him that Jeno finds him the most perfect.

And when Jeno thinks of Renjun, he thinks of heartbreak and insecurities. When Jeno thinks of Renjun, he thinks of crying, screaming and pain. Renjun was a nice person, who was a sweet boy. And Jeno doesn't have the right, he can't hate Renjun. Because Renjun never did anything to him, to the people he loves. All Renjun did was have a innocent crush on Jaemin, which probably bloomed into something more. But it's impossible, and entirely hypocritical of Jeno to despise Renjun because of his feelings.

When Jeno thinks or Renjun, he thinks of insecurities. His own insecurities. He thinks about how Jaemin is his best friend, about how Jaemin adores Renjun so much. He thinks about how Donghyuck wouldn't be the boy he was today without Renjun, the thinks about how Renjun quite literally saved Donghyuck. He thinks about how Mark is grateful for Renjun, how Renjun is so appreciated and glorified in his eyes.

When Jeno thinks about Renjun, he thinks about giving up.

——

It's when Mark kisses him, that Jaemin melts. It's when there are soft lips nipping at his own, when there are warm hands dancing across his body that Jaemin's mind turns foggy. When Mark kisses him impatiently, with passion and emotion, Jaemin feels his body go numb from the overbearing affection.

It's when Mark has a hand up his shirt, setting his sensitive skin ablaze that he tightens his grip around the elder boy's neck just the slightest, pushing up into his hands just a bit more.

And it's when Mark start licking and bitting at his throat that Jeno walks into the room.

"Spicy," Jeno comments, seeming shameless as he pushes himself between the two panting boys. And it wasn't wrong. Jeno was indeed shameless. "But rude to start without me." He continues, looking at Mark with big, sad eyes. "Asshole."

Mark splutters, while Jaemin blushes so hard that he can feel his own heat radiating off of his face. Jeno just smirks, closing his eyes and looping his arms around Mark's torso.

Jeno was just teasing, they all knew that, but Mark couldn't help but pepper millions of little kisses across the younger's face. It would be a lie if he said he didn't feel kind of bad.

Soon, the door opens again, and Donghyuck comes in. Donghyuck lays himself entirely on top of Jaemin, having the younger boy groan a bit before shifting slightly to get comfortable. Donghyuck has his face pressed into Jaemin's neck, slowly kissing the little bit of skin he has access to.

"You guys shouldn't start coming in unannounced all the time," Jaemin whines when Donghyuck starts bitting. "I don't mind, but y'know, privacy and shit."

Jeno scoffs, turning around so that his back was pressed to Mark's chest, and he was facing Jaemin.

"Like you actually have a problem with it. You're literally an attention whore," he says, and Jaemin can't help but blush at the comment. Of course Jaemin likes attention, who doesn't? Being smothered in warmth, hugs, kisses and love? Who wouldn't want that? In turn, maybe he is an attention whore. But like he'd ever admit it.

Mark chuckles at Jeno's words, while Donghyuck giggles into Jaemin's neck. The latter is just glad that Donghyuck has stopped messing around with his neck, because that would've lead into something else.

"Also," Donghyuck pipes up. "Question."

"Shoot," Jeno and Mark say at the same time.

"Why are the beds pushed together?"

Jaemin groans at the question, having the answer ready on the tip of his tongue. It's his and Mark's dorm room they're in right now anyways. And it's always his and Mark's dorm room they're in. It was always the cleaner one, the nicer smelling one, and the homier one.

"Because you guys couch crash so much, we decided it would be easier to accommodate four eighteen year old boys if the beds were pushed together," Jaemin explains. Mark has a pout on his face when Jaemin is done explaining, nudging the younger lightly with his foot.

"I'm nineteen," Mark whines, having Jaemin roll his eyes at him.

"Sorry, three eighteen year olds and one nineteen year old," he corrects, huffing and laying his cheek on Donghyuck's hair.

"That's better."

__________

idk why i'm saying this, now of all times, but y'all read the tags in the prologue before reading cause some of you guys were cheesed and the comments for me pressed sis

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