My Love, My Drug, My Release

Chapter 30: Mum

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Paul had made some pretty incredible exits in the past, but that last one had to take the cake. Left me like a fucking idiot on the floor, ass sore from when he threw me down. It brought me back to when he gripped me hard by the arm after my birthday, telling me he'd only done what I'd asked him to, what I told him to do. He didn't deck me in the face then, and he didn't do it now, so how could I classify these interactions? Him using his physical person to assert power and dominance over me. It was cold and distant, yet incredibly intimate. Wasn't that why he tried to kiss me after? Because this kind of act was sexual in nature; he did it cause it felt good.

I had to get up sooner or later, so when the phone rang seemed as good an opportunity as any. So many thoughts floated through my head, I didn't have time to ponder who was calling. "Eastman residence, may I ask who this is?"

"Baby girl."

"Keith," I whispered into the receiver before looking over both my shoulders, terrified Paul would come down the stairs and catch me redhanded. "How- how are you?"

"I'm fine. I was getting a little worried about you, kid," he said, chewing audibly. "Linda came by asking if we'd seen you. I told her no, unfortunately; my smile would be a hell of a lot bigger if I'd seen my Lola." 

"Oh, I'm fine, sorry if I gave you a fright."

"What you gave me is a hankering to see you again. When can we make that happen?"

I paused, twisting the cord around my finger, chewing on my lower lip. I wanted to see him too, wanted to see him naked, but I'd already scared my stepmom enough for one week, I didn't need to be running off with junkhead guitarists. But goddamn it, I wanted him, I wanted him, I wanted him. I'd tasted freedom today with Gally and I didn't want to let it go so quickly. "I have cheer practice tomorrow until about five. Do you want me to come to your flat after that?"

"How do you think you'd get here?" 

"Hail a cab?"

"A cab!" Keith shouted, making me pull the phone away from my face slightly. "No, not my Lola, not on my watch. Anita and I will pick you up."

"No, you don't have to do that-"

"St. Peter's, right?"

"Yes, but-"

"I'll see you tomorrow, pussycat, but I gotta go get high now, ta-ta." He hung up abruptly, which made me wilt momentarily, but then I started jumping up and down, trembling with excitement. Would I ever get tired of seeing him or hearing him on the other end of the phone? He was the most beautifully decadent bite of forbidden fruit I'd ever tasted. I needed more, or I might burst into flames right where I stood. Tomorrow afternoon was too far away.

The front door unlocking shook me out of my reverie, and I remembered there was something I ought to be anxious about.

"Paul, I'm home, I didn't find her."

Oh right, Linda, the woman who had been chasing after me for hours, the person I was going to have to convince to let me go off tomorrow on another escapade. "Linda," I called down the hall. Her footsteps stopped, then they sped up, turning around the corner into the kitchen. "Hi, I'm home."

She gasped, weeping slightly, before taking me into her arms. "Honey, I was so worried!"

"Well, I'm fine, I just went out with my schoolmates," I mumbled into her ear, face slightly squished from the firmness of her embrace. "I'm sorry I didn't tell Robert before I left."

"You should be." She held me at arm's length as though examining me for any bumps or bruises, signs of mistreatment. If she looked at the backs of my thighs, she'd probably see the carpet burn from Paul flinging me to the floor, the black and blues starting to bloom like flowers in late April. But, finding no visible deformity, she simply said, "No harm, no foul, I suppose."

When her back was turned, going to get something out of the fridge, I added rapidly with a heart full of terror, "And they want me to go out with them tomorrow too."

She turned on the heels of her off-white, slick-back mules, peasant shirt flowing around her. "What did you just say to me?"

"I said, my mates wanted to see me again tomorrow, if that's okay with you."

"Are you pulling my leg? You must be pulling my leg to think that after everything we went through today, after all the fear and stress and fighting, that I would allow you to go out with the people a second time-"

"Please, Mum!"

My words made her stop short, face caught in a strange, in between expression. I stood there confused for a moment, then I realized what I'd done: I'd called her 'Mum'. I don't think I'd ever done that before, not even by accident, and I tried my darndest to not even think it. She reached out and touched my face lightly, the pads of her fingers barely grazing my cheek, blue eyes filled with a melancholy sort of hope. 

"Alright, Lo, I guess it couldn't hurt."

I hesitated, then jumped into Linda's arms, nearly knocking her over, wrapping my gangly limbs around her neck. She hugged me back around the waist, squeezing the dull ache I felt over referring to her as my mother right out of my body. Her embrace actually felt quite pleasant. 

"Thank you, thank you, a trillion times thank you," I said before running upstairs and flopping face down onto my bed, falling to sleep without bothering to take off my clothes.

I'm really glad to be back into this story, the words are just flowing again! I really like how it's all shaping up, and am super duper excited to write the next few chapters!!!