My Love, My Drug, My Release

Chapter 34: More Than Friends

You guys.......... we did it!!!!!! We got to 10k reads, holy shit! You all are the most dedicated, amazing readers a writer could ask for. I love you, I love you, I love you, and I don't care who knows it! 

Thelma ignored me throughout all of cheer practice, and even partnered with Connie, leaving me to practice lifts with Rosemary.

"You're getting stronger," the blonde noted as I returned her to the ground. "I'm impressed."

"Thanks," I said, wiping sweat off my forehead.

"Hey, so, I don't mean to pry, but is there something going on with you and Thelma?" Her words made my hair stand up on end. Had she figured out that we were more than friends, that we'd... well we hadn't really done anything, had we? Other than spit vodka into each other's mouths and take off our tops, and even that sounded raunchier than the actual event. But Rosemary's blue eyes were full of innocent curiosity. "Did you guys get into a fight?"

I practically sighed with relief. "Yeah, I sort of blew her off. We were going to see Mummy, Bobby, Kiddie, and Girly or whatever, that horror flick. And now she's not talking to me so I don't know how to fix it."

"You know I sort of wanted to go see that film, so maybe I could come with you and help smooth things over." She wore the broadest smile, as though she'd just solved all my woes, completely ignorant to the fact that she'd only exacerbated them a thousand-fold. "Alright everyone, that's enough for today, pack it up."

Most everyone left in a hurry, excited to get out of practice early, but Thelma lingered, dejected-looking. 

"Hey, come here!" Rosemary said, gesturing for her to approach us.

She walked over, arms crossed protectively over her chest, pointedly avoiding my gaze. "Did you need something Rose?"

"Lo and I wanted to invite you to see Mumsy, Nanny, Sonny, and Girly with us today."

"Did you?" Thelma asked with a tight mouth.

I nodded, looking at my sneakers which were tinged green with grass stains. "Cause you mentioned it."

"Alright, well, I'm going to go get my car," Rosemary said, leaving us alone on the small field.

"Are you fucking with me right now?" Thelma hissed, getting up in my face, and not in the way I wanted. "I'm so sick of you jerking me around. First, you ditch me for Adam, not that I minded because I assumed he's your beard, but now you turn my date idea into a girls' night with Rosie fucking Bridges?" She stopped, taking a deep breath, placing a hand over her chest. "You know what, maybe I haven't been transparent enough, so I'm just gonna clear the air right now. I like you in a very gay, lesbian, girl on girl, romantic, sexual, go on dates and kiss with tongue kind of a way, and if you don't feel the same, tell me now."

She'd been standing too close for too long, her scent confuddling my brain, making me want to do something stupid like kiss her. But I controlled myself, putting words together like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. "I know, and that's how a feel about you, but it's all a lot more complicated than just 'I like you, and you like me'-"

"But why? Why can't we just be together, if that's what we want?"

"Because of Gallagher?" I said like it was perfectly obvious, which I thought it was.

Her eyebrows shot into his forehead. "Adam!?"

"Don't call him that, he doesn't like it."

"Is he your beard or isn't he?" she demanded.

"Honestly," I said, pressing my fingers to my temples. "I have no bloody idea what that means."

"It means he's a boy you date to make people think you aren't a lesbian," she explained, clearly frustrated at my lack of knowledge. "Is that what 'Gallagher' is or not?"

Even though she wasn't quite right, she wasn't as far off as I'd like to believe. I didn't agree to be Gally's girlfriend so people wouldn't think I'm gay, but I couldn't deny that, at least subconsciously, I wanted a boyfriend my own age in case anyone got suspicious of Paul and me, or Keith and me for that matter. "Not exactly..." I said, voice trailing off with embarrassment.

"But you are gay?" she said, forcing me to meet her eyes.

"Thelma, I don't know, I feel things for you, but I also feel things for-"

"For Adam-"

"For men in general," I corrected, hoping that that would be easier to digest than me fancying her childhood friend. I was sorely mistaken.

"So you're just a straight girl screwing with me?" she spat.

"No, I like women, I-"

"I don't want you to like women, I WANT YOU TO LIKE ME!" she screamed in my face, making me look over my shoulder to check if anyone was eavesdropping. "Are you ashamed of me? I pour my heart out to you, and the best thing you can say in return is that you're tentatively attracted to my gender in general."

God, I should've just kissed her when I had the chance. Now I've dug myself a deep enough hole to effectively hide a dozen corpses, her sharp tongue and hardened features only making it tougher for me to think clearly. "Thelma, I-"

My words were drowned out by Rosemary honking her horn, waving us over, her face a peach blob in the distance. 

"We should go," Thelma said, throwing her bag over her shoulder with more force than necessary. "Wouldn't want to keep our friend waiting." She walked fast and even though I would have no trouble catching up to her with my long legs, I let her have her space, figuring she'd earned it. It wasn't until we were meters away from Thelma's vehicle that I noticed she drove a baby blue Volkswagen Beetle. A Beetle. Fuck the universe right up the arse.

Sorry this is a bit short, I'm going through sort of a hard time (therapy's been rough), and that can make me have a bit of writer's block, so I just wanted to get something up on this story while I had a moment of inspiration. I'll try to update more regularly, thank you as always for your patience and support.