Give Me Courage (BWWM)

CH. 52 The memories are here

CH. 52 The memories are here

*Sensitive topic below*

(Olivia POV)

"Olivia, Olivia, Wake up, it's time for the show." I turned and saw my Mother.

She was laying next to me, her face expressionless and her eyes blank with no emotions.

"Mama, I don't want to do the show. I'm tired and I don't like it." I told my mother, her face suddenly turned into an angry expression that frightened me.

"You will do what I say. Now get up." She said and I shivered at the tone she used.

I didn't want to get her angry, but I didn't want to do the show. I hated doing the shows, I hated being touch by those people.

I hated being filmed.

I didn't like the feeling.

This was wrong, this wasn't right and I would cry myself to sleep.

My mom grabbed me off the bed, with a grip that instantly brought pain to me.

She quickly shoved me to the wall and showed me an outfit, it was a little school girl outfit and it bothered me.

I always had to dress up in a certain outfit.

I remember when I had asked my mother why must I dress in such clothes, she said it was what the audience requested.

I never saw these audiences, but they saw me.

I only saw the people who were part of the show with me, and my mother. She was a part of the show too.

I took my clothes off and started to dress.

Not letting the unshed tears fall from my face.

I was tired of being part of those shows and one day, it will be over.

"Hurry up." My mother said in a harsh voice.

I shivered as I put the school girl skirt on.

Yes, one day it'll be over.

"Olivia, Olivia. Wake up, baby?" I opened my eyes and found myself on the airplane with Jake.

I looked at him and he had a concerned look on his face.

I was confused to why then I realized that I must have been voicing my nightmare.

"Are you okay? You were having a bad dream." He said in a gentle voice and I nodded my head not speaking.

I was scared to speak because I didn't want him to hear the sadness in my voice.

I refrained myself from speaking.

That wasn't going to sly with Jake, he gave me a serious look.

"Baby, what's wrong." He asked me and I know I couldn't hold back from telling him, just by the look in his eyes.

He was one of my best friends and my partner.

I didn't want to keep anything from him, even though voicing them would hurt.

I told him that I had a dream about one of the nights my mother had me filmed with her and the others for the so-called audience.

It's been a while since I had those dreams and of course, we both knew what triggered them.

It was the fact that I was going to face some of the people that were part of it.

My mind was making me remember these things and it bothered me knowing that all memories were horrible.

Why was it making me remember all the pain and suffering I've been through.

Why now? Because I was going to see those people?

Because I was going to be around them again?

Or maybe... Maybe my mind was testing me.

Testing me to see if I was strong enough to actually face people that have brought my child self so much pain, suffering and trust issues.

Maybe my mind was testing me to see if I was really ready.

Was I?

If a simple dream had caused me this much pain.

How will I even react to the people in person who are behind the pain I feel.

I shook my head.

I was pushing the thoughts away from my head because I didn't want to think about the negative thoughts.

I am strong, I know that I am strong because I have faced many things but I am still here.

I'm still breathing.

I'm still living.

I'm Alive and I'm still fighting.

These people can't hurt me anymore, they've hurt the Old Olivia.

The kid version of Olivia and they have ripped her childhood right in front of her.

The Old Olivia never had a good childhood.

I have come to conclusion with that, but there's one thing I know for sure.

I won't sit down and let other kids go through what I have gone through.

I won't just sit there and let it happen.

I'm going to be strong, I'm going to face these people and I'm going to help put a stop to this.

I nodded my head and turned to look at Jake who was still staring at me with a look of concern.

I grabbed his hand and held on to it, giving it a squeeze.

It was like I was double checking to make sure he was actually here.

That Jake was actually here with me.

That he was by my side and was going to go through this with me.

That he was real.

I squeezed his hand again and gave him a soft smile.

"Yeah, I'm okay baby. It's just that nightmare I just told you about took a small toll on me that's all. I remember the last one I had was when I was in the Hospital but I'm fine now." I said and his eyes widen.

"You were mumbling and your face formed a hurt expression in your sleep. I was really worried, I still am. Are you sure you're okay? The description of your dreamed had me feeling things also. I'm so sorry baby." Jake said pulling me into the comfort of his arms.

I took in his scent and my mind fell at ease.

"I love you," I said and I heard his heart beating fast just from my three words.

"I love you too baby, very much." He said.

"Will get there in an hour," I said and he nodded his head.

"Yes, but know this. You'll no longer have to face anything alone ever. Remember, you have your sisters and now you have me. Also, Dr. Nila and your brother. You've also made some friends. Natasha and Bryson. So you're not alone, and you will never be alone." He said and I smiled gently.

"Thank you, sweetie," I said hugging him tightly and he let out a chuckle.

"Anytime my little Liv Live."

(*Kassandra Speaks*)

I gave you guys a little insight into Olivia past again but this time something that will show you guys what had happened one time to her before she had to perform for the audience. I did warn you guys that it's something serious that is coming in ahead, so if you stayed through the whole chapter. Thank you, I know it's hard for others, as it is for me

Thank you for continuing on reading and I will see you all on the next chapter.

Give this chapter a VOTE & COMMENT

XOXOXO

-Kassandra Vivu