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Prologue

If this is the first book you've ever read that I've written then Welcome to my fictional world of emotional torture. I'm a wife, a Mom of 3 tiny terrors, 26 years old, evil, I love plot twists, and I update very frequently well I did before I had my 3rd child. For some reason 2 kids feels like 2 but 3 kids feels like 15. I digress. Enjoy.

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🚨 Trigger warning 🚨
This book contains description/talk of: stalking, rape, abortion, miscarriage, stillbirth, drugs, mental and physical abuse, murder. If any of those are triggers to read then please proceed with caution.

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Prologue

Around and around and around. The tip of my finger dances across the smooth rim of the shot glass, the liquid within it a golden brown. It's almost the same color as the shiny bar top it's placed on. My teeth dig into my lower lip and my eyebrows furrow as I stare into the glass of whiskey, my eyes searching it's depths as if it held the answers to all the questions in the universe, my mind miles away.

I take a deep inhale, the mixture of cigar and cigarette smoke in the building burning my lungs but I ignore it. I can practically taste the nicotine but the notes of oak from the whiskey on my tongue has my full attention. The bars busy, filled with noise that would normally make my ears ring. A jukebox playing in the corner, guys playing pool toward the back and a group of rowdy girls laughing at a nearby table but it all combines into a singular buzz that I can't decipher. Even with a shot of whiskey down I can't stop my thoughts as they wander right back to him. His dark green eyes, his sandy blonde hair and the cowlick he woke up with every morning. The freckle right by his upper lip that I had to taste every time I kissed him. The way my heart skipped a beat when he smiled.

"Nola, come on. Did we put our fuck me shoes on to make bad decisions and get drunk or did we come to sulk? Take the shots, have fun, and go screw that hot ass dude that keeps eyeballing you like you're the last Reese's peanut butter cup in the bag." Jade's voice is like a bucket of ice water, washing over me and effectively pulling me from my thoughts.

My eyes flick up to meet hers and I pull my hand away from the glass wishing I could dive head first into the bottle of whiskey and drown. My stomach flutters as I feel the 'hot ass dude's' eyes rolling across my body. He's definitely getting a good look with the skin tight dress I'm wearing, it leaves very little to the imagination just as I wanted it to. I got dressed adamant I would come have a good time, maybe even get laid and finally get over my ex, now I'm missing my sweats.

I feel his eyes brush up my legs as of it were the tips of his fingers, dance against my inner thighs as if it were his breath. I feel it so well I have to cross my legs and shift on the stool. I glance over at him just to make sure he's still seated at the table with a couple guys just as he had been a few minutes before I zoned out.