Neko // Jamilton // Hamilton ✔️

twenty-six; going to sleep + the story of aaron [edited]

alex's pov

"Shit." John immediately says when I finish telling them everything. I shrug, realizing I never even think twice about anything now. It's like I don't care about anything anymore, but honestly, it just tires me all out.

"And you haven't grown at all," Hercules mumbles, "How long has it been, Alexander? Do you have growth issues?"

"Shut up!" I slap his arm and mutter, "It's been four years."

"Aw..." Lafayette hugs me from behind, "You're still so small and act like such a lion."

I sigh heavily, but I could never get annoyed at a poor and pure person like Lafayette.

"It's late," John cut in and I looked up. He stood at the base of the staircase leading to their house above the bakery. I smiled. I had missed their house that smelled of sweets and sugar, "C'mon, Alex. You probably want to sleep."

"We don't have any extra rooms..." Hercules began to say. Lafayette got off me and I watched John and Hercules have a conversation with their faces.

John sighed.

Hercules narrowed his eyes.

John rolled his eyes.

Hercules glared at him.

John threw his hands up, "I don't anymore, Herc! I don't. Not anymore. Not after... all that. I would feel terrible if I did," He looked at me and I looked back with hopefully the most confused look on my face ever, "You can sleep in my room."

He began to walk upstairs. I looked at Hercules and he gestured to the stairs. Slowly, he nodded, "Go get some sleep. You've needed it for a while."

I walk past him and follow John up the stairs. Just like the last time I was here, it smelled like sugar and flour. I smiled, smelling it. John's door was still the very last one and the door was still wood with peeling white paint.

He opened up the door and I got my first taste of his room in a while.

A plain bed with similar white wood as the door sat in the corner of the room. Green sheets covered it up and a single pillow was thrown on one side of the bed. He had a few pictures up in his room, mostly of Hercules and Lafayette. In one of them, I sat on the counter as they made cakes. I looked the same, but more tired now.

I sighed.

There was nothing else in his room but a closet that he pulled open and took a blanket out of, "Here." He said.

"I won't sleep in your bed?" I asked, confused.

"No," John answered quickly, "I don't want to be the first to sleep with you after what you went through. I don't trust myself not to hurt you somehow."

I looked at him, "I didn't mean date, you idiot. I meant because the floor is probably uncomfortable as hell."

He looked uncomfortable as he mumbled, "There's no space on my bed."

I sighed, "What time is it?"

He pointed to a clock above the doorframe which I hadn't noticed. It was still five in the afternoon, which meant it had been two hours since I left the dorm. At that realization, my eyes began to water.

"Alex," John noticed, of course, "You miss him, don't you?"

I nodded, "I haven't slept alone since Francis."

"Even when he first met you? Before... dating?"

"I cried at night and wanted to sleep with him."

"Oh."

I nodded silently and then put the blanket on the floor. I still had all of his hoodies. I threw them on the floor and laid down. The blanket covered up my entire body and more and the pillows smelled like Thomas.

John said something I couldn't hear and I heard the sound of a door closing.

Even though it was only five in the afternoon, I felt tired enough to sleep. I always did. I was a cat, after all. 

~~~

ealier in the day  /  thomas' pov

"Hey!" Aaron said, patting me on the back before I could flee the classroom, "You want to come over and study with Theodosia and me?"

I made a large show of thinking about my answer, even when I knew what it was. After several minutes, I deadpanned, "Sorry, I have plans... Maybe next time though, I'd love to be there in a month or... twenty years."

Aaron rolled his eyes and slapped my chest, "You're so funny, man."

"I'm not..." I sighed and pet his head, "And you're... not." I turned around before I could see his laughing face. I could definitely hear it though as I left the classroom.

I rolled my eyes. I didn't understand why we were still friends. The way we met, back in primary school, was horrifying. I was surprised he still talked to me. He tolerated me as no one else had. I sighed and held in a laugh.

"I'm Aaron Burr. I'm nine-years-old and I skipped two grades. It's nice to meet all of you!" The small boy in the front of the classroom squeaked. 

A girl raised her hand and the teacher, Mrs. Vans, called on her, "You shouldn't be smart enough to be. This place is for big kids." Thomas watched the small boy in front of the classroom as he started crying.

Of course, he started crying. If he was extremely gifted, his social skills would be affected. Aaron was living proof of that.

Thomas didn't say anything as the teacher told the children to go outside. He watched the girl laugh, like she was happy about what just happen, and follow her friends out to the yard. Thomas stayed in his seat and watched the boy still.

"Hey," Thomas' best friend slapped the back of his head, "Stop staring, you look like a pedo. C'mon." 

"I'll be there in a second," Thomas responded, getting out of his chair and walking to the boy, still in the front of the classroom.

"Thomas." The teacher said sternly and he ignored her.

"Hey," Thomas touched Aaron's head and Aaron looked up with watery eyes, "Ignore her. She always bullies everyone. Besides, you earned your place here and you belong here. Don't let them slow you down."

He stood up, but Aaron stood up faster. Thomas was taller than Aaron by a lot, Aaron nearly went to his shoulders. Aaron hugged the taller boy, burying his face in Thomas' coat.

"He's like a baby," Thomas said blankly to his teacher.

Aaron didn't cry at the remark.

"Alex," I called out, "I'm home, open the door." I had my key, but I wanted his standing ears to be the first thing I saw when I got home.

He didn't answer the door for five minutes and I took my key out of my pocket.

Unlocking the door, I looked around.

The hoodie of mine I had left on the sofa was gone. I sighed and walked into the kitchen, getting some water. My mind wandered and I was silent.

I was completely silent and so was he.

Honestly, Alex was probably asleep.

I pulled on a jacket that I also had. It was nearly my only jacket, for a time when the hoodie wasn't enough in the snow. Wearing the jacket over my t-shirt, I made into the hallway and opened the door to our bedroom.

And he wasn't there either.

~~~

i like aaron more now

not that i hated him

ok maybe a bit, i'm sorry

[yo what the hell, past-self? how could you hate (even a tiny bit) such a pure creature? get out of here. also, this is making me sad, editing and re-reading lmao]