Louder Than Love || Chris Cornell

The Cattle Club

Sacramento California, January 31 1989

A couple of hours later, I wake up to reach over to find Chris no longer with me in bed, but a little note left where he was sleeping.

Hi beautiful,

Went to the Cattle Club Early to set up, head on over whenever you're ready

You are so beautiful sleeping I didn't want to wake you

Love, Chris

I smile at the note and smush my head back into the pillow. I then decide to get up, take and extremely quick shower, then throw my hair up in a messy bun and try to figure out what to wear. I decide to go with my black skinny ripped jeans with some band patches that I had added myself to the legs of the jeans, my silver studded belt, my Doc Martens, and a Type O Negative shirt I had found at a thrift store that Chris and I stopped at along our way to Sacramento. But I wanted to cut it up and style it like I do with my other shirts so I found a pair of scissors and quickly did some modifications. I made the back of it look laced up and cut the collar and sleeves to turn it into a loose but fitted tank top. The front of the shirt had the Type O Negative logo with a photo of Kenny, Josh, Peter and Johnny and in quotes at the bottom 'none more negative'.

I threw on my black lacy bra and then the shirt and you could see my bra through the sides and the back and it looked so fucking cool. Sometimes I wonder if I should just make clothes for a living. I threw on my silver studded wrist cuff and my leather jacket, spritzed some perfume, Chris's favourite, and headed out the door across the street to The Cattle Club.

I get inside The Cattle Club and head directly to the bar. There were tons of people already inside which was really cool to see. I order a Jack and Coke and nearly loose my breathe when I take a drink. Holy fuck it was strong. I wasn't exactly sure where to go so I walked through the crowd to see if I could find a stage manager so I could see Chris. I should've went through the back entrance. As I walk through the crowd I accidentally bump into a guy. He turns to look at me.

"Shit sorry," I apologize as I look up at him.

"That's ok... hey... wait... Andi? Is that you?" He says. Suddenly that voice sounds all too familiar.

"It's Baz... fuck I haven't seen you since high school..." He says excitedly.

"What? Oh my god... Hi!"

Suddenly it all comes back to me and it hits me like a wall. Sebastian Bach... well really Bierk but he changed his name when he moved to Toronto. He leans his tall frame down and hugs me so tightly. I return the hug careful not to spill my drink.

"Fuck you're looking really good," He says with a smile.

"Thanks... uh.. you too," I blush.

"Are you living out here...? Or...-" He asks

"No... no I uh... I'm... travelling I guess you could say...?" I didn't know how to explain it without sounding like a groupie.

"Oh ok... I'm playing over at the Ace Of Spades bar tomorrow night... you should come and check it out.." Baz says.

"Really? That's fucking awesome... I think we should be able to make it..." I say.

"We...? But I only see you..." He flirts and I blush.He always did that, even when we were kids.

"Anyways... I came here to check out Soundgarden... I didn't know you were into them too..." He takes a sip of his beer. He has no idea.

"Uh well yea... I saw them play at the Gorilla Room in Seattle for the first time about maybe 6 months ago and Chris- I mean- they blew my mind..." I say as I catch myself.