// It's just you and I tonight // (A Matty Healy Fanfiction)

The last day continued

We arrive on time at the station. The are no taxis hanging around so we begin to stroll the 15 minutes to The Manor. The road we walk down has no pavement, just grassy ridges either side. It's a typically british winding country road and it's a pleasant way to walk. occasionally tractors come through and we have to clamber up the ridge to avoid their paths. The sun is shining from behind a cloud and the air is crisp and cold. Birds sing in the trees along the roadside and every so often we can see a cute cottage or farmhouse by the side of the road. We don't talk much, but the silence is comfortable and thoughtful. It feels like we've said all we can say.

Soon the small town comes into view and it becomes clear that The Manor is fast approaching. Matty squeezes my hand and smiles at me. I smile back and we continue on, past the pretty church and the tiny corner shop and up the increasing slope leading to the Manor. Soon it's in sight. I feel a pang of sadness as I see it, it feels like years since I saw it at the start of our holiday. As we approach the driveway we can see that it's backed up with cars coming to collect people. There's a small layby across from the queue of cars where a silver BMW waits. Jamie's mum. Luckily she doesn't see me as she's reading and we walk quickly up a little so that she can't see that I've come from a different direction to Jamie. We lean against the fencing and embrace, he kisses me.

"This is not the end babe" he looks me right in the eyes "remember that, yeah?"

"Yeah" I smile slightly and kiss him again

"Oi, Lovebirds" it's George. Him, Jamie, Adam and Ross are wheeling their suitcases down the hill towards us, smiling.

"Hey!" Jamie shouts with a grin as I pull her into a long hug. We pull apart and I look over at George

"Hey, Holly" he smiles "do I get a hug?" I glance at Matty's reassuring smile before throwing myself into his big arms. His hug is friendly and simple, if he's not over me he's doing a good impression of someone who is. Matty smiles as we part and puts his hand in mine again.

"So, I guess this is goodbye" Jamie says "I'm not going till I've hugged every one of you, come on!" everyone joins in a clumsy and uncomfortable group hug, even Adam and Ross reluctantly pile in. We stroll to the front of the gates and wait for people's cars to arrive. Ross and Adam get in Adams mums car and drive away, we wave them off, grinning. Then it's just the four of us. we stand slightly awkwardly and in virtual silence. Nobody knows what to say. Eventually a white Porsche pulls up and Matty's says, with a tinge of resentment, "That's Mum!" he turns to me and we embrace, kissing passionately as I break into tears. "Hey" he says, bending down to wipe the tears from my cheeks and looking me in the eyes "us against the world, right, Hols?"

"Yeah... Us against the world" I sob

Jamie and George hug and exchange numbers and me and Matty confirm we have each others facebooks and stuff. Before I know it I'm in the car, driving away from the best two weeks of my life.

"Was that boy's mum Denise Welch? Off the telly? From Loose Women? I swear she looked exactly like her! It was her wasn't it?"

"Yeah, I thought that!" says Jamie "it actually was!" Well that explains the money, I think to myself.

I spend the journey home looking out of the window and letting a couple of tears fall. I know it's not the end for us but equally I know we'll never have it any better than those two weeks. Everything from here onwards is dull by comparison!

When I get home I don't eat a lot at dinner and Mum asks what's wrong

"Nothing" I say "it was amazing, i'm just gonna miss it that's all"

"Why don't you take your bag upstairs and have a bath? It might help?"

"Yeah that sounds great" I say and I lug my bag up to my attic room. I sit on my bed and look around at all the posters and stickers on the walls, the scented candles and schoolbooks and all I can think of is how unchanged it all is. I feel like I've changed so much from my experiences in the last two weeks... and yet my whole normal life will stay exactly the same! I start to sob again as I unpack my suitcase and start to put things away in drawers. I find the dress Matty got me and let my tears fall on it as I stroke the silky fabric in my hands, I smell him on all my clothes and the posh soap from his dad's house on my skin.

Then I open the front zipper. I feel around in the pocket and pull out something thin and square. It is a CD in a plastic sleeve with the artwork drawn on paper and cello taped, with care, to the front. The artwork is a white rectangle on a black background. The words 'The 1975' are are fully outlined inside it. I flip the casing over and find a song list of 16 songs, handwritten in messy printed letters. I turn my computer on and slip the disc into the slot. As I do so a piece of paper falls out of the casing so I pick it up as the first song starts.

"Hols,

This is our album. I wanted you to be the first to hear it all in full. Hope you love it as much as I do!

I'll see you soon, don't worry, and if you ever need me I'm here.

Remember that I love you,

Matty x"

I clutch the note to my heart and smile genuinely for the first time all day. The songs start and I feel so privileged to be the first person hearing them. I imagine him singing and memories of this morning and the time in costume room flood back to me.

This is not the end.

____________________

THERE WILL BE MORE INSTALMENTS OF THIS BOOK, ITS NOT OVER YET!

Thanks for all the love and support, you don't know how much more confident I am about my writing now, I love you all and I'm so grateful!

Xxxxxxx