In Their Shadow

Chapter 36

'I'm alright.'

He thought, a tear sliding down his cheek.

"You sick fuck..."

'I do not feel guilty.'

He thought, holding back the urge to clench his fist.

"Yeah, sure you could call me sick. And maybe you wouldn't be wrong. But the fact here is that if I hadn't done what I did, you wouldn't be standing there to insult me."

'Why am I saying this?'

He thought, unable to prevent a smile from stretching across his now crazed face.

"Don't you get it? If I wanted too, I could've just let your team die and save the two people I actually cared about. You only breath because I chose to save you on a whim. An accessory to the people I actually wanted to save."

He said, holding back the desire to cringe at seeing Naruko's and Sasuke's fear of him manifest.

'I feel sick.'

He thought, as he swallowed back the bile that rushed up his throat.

"I couldn't give less of a shit whether you were alive or dead. I honestly loath you. Do you even remember all the countless times you bullied and belittled me, or are you just too fucking dumb to remember?"

'Why do I feel sick?'

He thought as his stomach began to clench.

"The fact of the matter is you mean very little to me. As easy as I saved your live is as easily as I could take it away. Anyone who insults or threatens me or those I care about can go to hell. So yes, I don't care about the lives I took, and you should thank your lucky stars I don't, cuz if I did..."

'Oh, I know why...'

He thought as the reality fell upon him.

"You wouldn't even have had the opportunity to call me a freak or a monster."

'Because they're right. I am a monster. I am a freak. I killed those people and felt nothing. I'm a monster...I'm a freak...'

He thought, wiping his misty hand against his pants, trying to rid himself of the dirty feeling.

'Please stop looking at me like that Naruko and Sasuke...'

He thought, begging for their wordless judgement to end.

"Anyways, now that that is out of the way, lets hurry up and pass this exam! I need something to eat!"

'That's not true..'

He thought as he marched away.

'I just want to get away from anything that reminds me of...'

'How dirty I am.'

Yuma continued to walk to the tower, wiping his shadowy hands against his shirt, the dirty feeling increasing as he thought about the blood of the people he had killed bathing him.

He continued to march, until a hand grabbed at his back, stopping him in tracks.

"Yuma..."

Naruko's voice came from behind, making his heart began to beat faster.

"I-I want to talk...We want to talk...Me and Sasuke...We're here for you...Okay?" Naruko said.