F***in' Arizona

Back to the Future in My DeLorean (Chapter 18)

BACK TO THE PRESENT

*Ari, Nova, and Maya hanging out*

"Wait, I thought you said you and Charlie were fuckin' this morning," Maya says confused.

"Uh, yeeeaaahhh. Me and Charlie currently aren't together but I thought I already mentioned that?"

"Da fuck?" I say astonished. "I'm so confused right now. If ya'll are broken up, why are y'all fuckin'? Not only that, but the way y'all broke up sounds like you didn't want to ever see him again."

"Right! Ricky, you got some 'splainin' to do!" Maya says trying to do her best at quoting the famous line from I Love Lucy.

"Pretty certain I mentioned it at the beginning, but I guess since it was such a long story, it should be said again. We're done. After saying that whole story out loud, I know we're done," Ari says shrugging his shoulders somberly.

"Have you talked to him since? I mean, like before this morning. It's been a while, right?" I ask, readjusting myself in the chair to hear the story better.

"As much as I didn't want to speak to him at all after that, I reluctantly caved after a while. I know, I know, I'm a bitch, but we always had great sex and it's not like I have someone else on retainer. Which brings me to the point..."

"Brings you to what point?" Maya inquires curiously.

"Well, the two of us met up again after that. After the breakup I mean. Dak and I went back to California after the holiday break to continue with school, you know, the regular stuff.
One day I get a knock at my door. My roommate answers and yells out that there is a guy named Charlie looking for me. I didn't believe him at first, so I made my way to the living room and almost spit out the beer I was illegally drinking. I grabbed Charlie and dragged him out into the hallway and cussed him out for have the audacity to come back to my place."

Ari takes a pause to gather his thoughts. The expression on his face looked like the wheels in his brain behind his tired eyes were spinning out of control and about to hit a tree.

"Well?? Spill it boy!" Maya says slapping his arm, causing him to release the pent-up tension in inside and let out a nervous laugh.

"Ok, ok. We argued for a while, but my neighbors started coming home so we took our confrontation back inside. My roommate left to give us some space and I'm glad he did."

"Why? Because you guys were arguing?" I asked.

"Because we ended up having it out and having angry argument sex. We fucked the hell out of each other."

"WHAT???!!!" Maya and I shout simultaneously.

"Are you crazy!" I say rather than question.

"I am. I'm still a little crazy about him. Like I said, we have history and have been friends for years and he was my first for a lot of things. No matter how much I want to fight it and say, 'fuck him!' I just can't. Not yet. I know that makes me a fool and I know it makes me an ignoramus, but I can't help it."

"You're right. It makes you a fool. A lovesick fool. Ari, you can't play this by being in the middle. This isn't that type of game. You either forget and forgive and run back to him, or you move on with your life and potentially find some other lucky guy to love you.
Take your time to grieve your relationship, but then move forward. I, and probably Maya, are hoping you'll go the smart way which is leaving him behind," I tell him sternly while reaching across the table to rub the back of his smooth tan colored hand.

The sounds in the building seemed to get louder and louder as I watched Ari's face in anticipation. People milling about with their tasty smelling food plethoras in hand, children bouncing up and down in their chairs trying to gain the much-needed attention of their parent, and people obnoxiously smacking on their lunch with their mouth open while they spoke.

"Try answering this, do you want to go back to Charlie? Do you think you can truly forgive him for cheating and continue to be around him and love him even though he obviously didn't love you enough to not fuck some other guy?" Maya says asking the hard questions.

Maya and I sit for an extended amount of time while Ari thinks on his answer. We throw each other glances of worry for what the answer might be, but we try to keep hope.

"I don't think I can. Our recent hookup served as a last "hurrah" for me, I think. It should stay that way. I've got to move on. I'll take my time to get over losing a best friend and companion; a lover, but then I'll start living for myself," Ari says with his eyes down like he doesn't fully believe the words leaving his pouted lips.

"I hate to say it, but you definitely deserve better, best friend. Charlie was a cool guy, but people change from how they were in high school. We never stay the same and it can be so disappointing to us when someone we know and love changes from what we're used to. It's just a sign that you guys are moving in two different directions and that's ok," I tell Ari trying my best to comfort him.

"Yeah, and it also just means that he obviously wasn't the one for you, but he was needed for your growth at the time. He helped you become who you are today so be grateful for that. But he is not meant to stay in your life forever and that will take some time to accept. The right one for you will come along. Being patient is the hard part, but the reward will be so worthwhile!" Maya says comfortingly while hugging him and rubbing his back.

When exactly did she become so wise when it comes to relationships? Hell, when did I?? I've only had one!

"I understand that Charlie broke your heart and your spirit, and you felt like that would never happen because of who you were to each other. I understand that you miss him dearly, but it's time to begin moving forward. We'll come back to this place in the future and reminisce about how this all happened and laugh. We'll be appreciative for the crazy, the good, and even the bad things that happened to help sculpt and mold us into who we are and we wouldn't have it happen any other way," I say standing up to give him a hug also.

By this time Ari is now ugly crying and leaning his giant frame into my comparably smaller one in an attempt to console himself. I rub circles into the areas of his back that I can reach and whisper positive affirmations that Remi used to tell me.

"You are an amazing person."

"You are the sweetest soul."

"You are cherished."

"You are loved."

"You are good enough."

"You will heal from this."

"You will become a stronger person from this."

"You will smile and laugh again."

"I will be there every step of the way, and I love you."