The New Motive

The Book

Kokichi had no idea how he'd done it, or even when he had time to for that matter, but Shuichi had managed to read through all of his novels and had left early for the library by the time he woke up, most likely to update his collection.

The violette understood this, but despite how selfish it sounded, he missed him. A lot. He liked being the center of the other boy's attention. He liked that he actually paid attention. He liked when they were together. And he didn't want it to have to end so soon.

He didn't want it to end . . . ever.

Yes, they'd still see each other and talk every once and a while, but he wouldn't have to spend his time with him so often. And their were plenty of other students Kokichi imagined he'd enjoy being around more. He had Piano Girl, Space Guy, Space Guy's Assassin Girlfriend or whatever she was, Kiiboy, and pretty much everyone else, too, considering how likeable he is.

So, Kokichi'd be alone.

He didn't like to think about these kinds of things, though, so about this time he decided to get up and change into his regular clothes and out of Shuichi's night shirt.

He looked into the mirror above the sink to fix his hair and retie his scarf more evenly. But when he was done the purple haired male just stared into the mirror, his reflection staring back almost sadly.

It's gonna be fine, Ouma. It's gonna be fine. It's gonna be fine. It's gonna be- shit! Stop crying. A single tear rolled down his pale check and he wiped it away, but it wasn't long before several others raced after it in the same direction and then along his jawline, falling to the counter. So what, if he doesn't care? Why should I? I don't. I don't care. Right? This is just another lie, right? Yeah, that's it. It had to be. A lie.

A lie clever enough to fool even the Ultimate Supreme Leader.

. . .

Shuichi now had a new set of books to read ranging from Fahrenheit 451 and To Kill A Mockingbird to All the Bright Places and We Are Totally Normal. He'd gone and replaced all the older ones wherever they were supposed to go, but as he went to leave one fell out of his bag by one of the tables.

Like all the others, it was a seemingly normal book. It had obviously been handled before him and so parts of it were worn out and the cover wasn't anything to special. There weren't any dragons or colorful scenes with bright lights or even an image of a whole character. Nothing more than a small image in the corner of a yellow background with the author's name in bold white letters at the bottom. And a title.

He bent down and picked it up, turning it over in his hands a few times before tucking the copy of The Perks of being a Wallflower back into the safety of his bag and continuing his walk back to his room.

It was an older book. It had a simple cover. It had most definitely seen better days. These were all true. But this was his copy. Or the one he'd claimed as his own at least. And it meant more than almost anything in the world to him. All because of one boy.

Thank you, Ouma.

. . .

"Oh, you're back," Kokichi said excitedly as the taller entered the room. "It sure took you long enough." He laughed.

"Oh, I'm sorry. We're you waiting long?"

"Nah, I went and had breakfast and brought you back a plate."

"O- oh. Thank you."

"Hey," he said suddenly getting up and standing in front of the bluette, staring up at his sternly only a little ways away from his face, "what did we agree on about that?"

"A- about wh- what?" He asked nervously.

"That. We agreed you were gonna drop the stutter. Remember?"

"Oh, right." The shorter stayed where he was for a moment in response, seemingly waiting for something, but then he backed away, satisfied, and smiled up at his briefly before grabbing his bag swiftly and looking through it. "Hey!?"

"It's fine, Shu. I'm not gonna hurt it." He sifted through the books and nodded happily when he reached the taller's favorite. "Didn't you finish this one already?" he laughed.

"I, . . . Well, yeah, but . . ."

"But?"

"You see . . . ?"

"Right? So, mind if I look through it?"

"I, uh, no, not at all."

"Sweet." With that he threw himself onto the bed and flipped through to random pages, scrunching up his face in curiosity whenever he didn't get something. "'I would die for you. But I won't live for you'? What's that supposed to mean?"

"I, . . . It's complicated, I guess."

"Oh, well." He shrugged it off and flipped back through again coming across something else and began reading it aloud. "'It's just that I don't want to be somebody's crush. If somebody likes me, I want them to like the real me, not what they think I am. And I don't want them to carry it around inside. I want them to show me,'" he paused for a short while before finally finishing softly, "'so I can feel it too.' Wow. You read some deep stuff. I haven't read anything in a while, but I'm pretty sure none of it was as poetic as that."

"Oh, yeah. That's part of the reason I like it so much." he commented, both of them managing to avoid how relevant the specific quote actually was and how he just happened to stumble across it, however.

"Huh? I guess that makes sense," he said still looking at the pages. "Oh! This guy!" he blurted out excitedly, tapping the spot on the page where he found the name, "Whoever Patrick is! I like him!"

"Why?" Shuichi questioned curiously.

"His name's Patrick. What's not to like?" He smiled, laughing lightly. And Shuichi couldn't help but do the same.