Not This Time

How Are You Feeling

"Professor, how are you feeling?"

Edelgard seemed worried for Byleth. This wasn't the first time she had questioned her on how she was feeling, but Byleth didn't have any answer.

How was she feeling? Forget that. She was feeling nothing.

No matter how much she longed for it, it was gone. The Golden Deer had disappeared on a mission, taking Claude with them, and leaving Byleth helpless. It was almost time for them to head to Zanado, but Byleth didn't even want to battle.

"Professor?"

"I'm fine," Byleth answered numbly, saying it mostly just to appease Edelgard. The female didn't really seem to believe her, and she walked over to look directly in Byleth's eyes. Byleth wasn't fazed. Was she supposed to be?

"Professor, if you are hiding something from me, I suggest you quit that this instant," Edelgard narrowed her lavender eyes. Byleth just stared blankly; was she supposed to care? She could cut Edelgard down in an instant, and here she had the gall to threaten Byleth like this. "You are my professor. We share secrets, am I wrong?"

"If we do, then why don't you share something first, then?" Byleth responded, her tone completely even. Edelgard looked startled; she hadn't expected to be questioned in return.

"Turning the question back on me?" Edelgard frowned. After a moment's hesitation, she looked away. Byleth crossed her arms.

"If you cannot share something about yourself, then do not expect me to say anything. You can't say something like that if you are unwilling to share."

"...I suppose that is a valid point," Edelgard sighed, disappointed by the lack of information she had managed to extract. "Are you sure you are feeling alright, though?"

Well, I'm really feeling nothing at all.

Why can't I even muster up frustration at all of Edelgard's questions? It should make me annoyed, but I can't even feel irritated...

Yes, you can. But only with Claude.

Claude...

"...Yes, I'm fine."

Edelgard looked at a loss of what to say. Then her face set into determination, her eyes steeled with ambition.

"If you say so. Goodbye, Professor. Get some rest."

Edelgard disappeared, and Byleth slumped further into her chair. She leaned onto her desk, placing her forehead on the table.

She didn't realize she had fallen asleep until she heard the cathedral's bells ringing. Byleth slowly sat up, rubbing her eyes sleepily. At least the rest had been a temporary respite from her thoughts.

But now she longed for feeling once again. Byleth frowned; Claude hadn't come to visit her in about a week. While she certainly didn't miss his irritating smirk or his insincere smile, she wanted to feel again. Desperation began to fuel her decision, and Byleth stood.

She exited out of the Black Eagles classroom swiftly, curtly nodding at Dimitri, who waved back politely. Byleth slowly snuck towards the Golden Deer classroom, where students were making their way out of the classroom happily.

Byleth pushed past all the people exiting to get in. Aha! There he was. Claude was sitting at one of the desks, packing up his stuff. Professor Manuela was cleaning up her board, and smiled when she saw Byleth.

"Ah, Professor! What are you up to?" Manuela asked kindly, tapping her stick against the chalkboard. "Is it for advice? I know teaching can be difficult, I'm stuck with these misfits.."

"No, I'm fine," Byleth shook her head, shutting down Manuela's proposition. Claude turned to look at Byleth upon hearing her voice, a surprised look on his face. The songstress looked disappointed, but she didn't comment on it. "I'm actually here to talk to Claude."

The Golden Deer house leader smirked knowingly while Manuela watched the two in confusion.

"Okay, Teach," Claude stood hurriedly, grabbing his belongings. He walked over to her, and they both moved out of the classroom.

"Goodbye!" Manuela called after them, but the two of them didn't acknowledge her.

Byleth folded her arms as she looked at him. He was just walking with a smile on his face. Are you ever sad?

"How come you didn't come to see me?"

"Are...are you upset about that?" Claude questioned, surprise in his emerald eyes. The corner of his mouth twitched upward in amusement. "I thought you'd want some privacy. It's your first week teaching. I don't think you need anger fueling you while you're instructing."

"Oh," Byleth felt somewhat foolish now. "Well, I just figured that you'd come because I told you about...well...my lack of emotion."

"I told you I don't know how to help you," Claude frowned briefly before his visage veiled his true emotions once again. "What is it that you're looking for?"

"Answers that you don't have..."

"...I know I've made you angry before, and I know you were grateful for that," Claude mused. "But I want to see you without this blank look. Maybe that's weird, but I've never met anyone like you. So, tell you what. I'm going to try to help you emote...and you're going to help me find out everything about you. Okay?"

"...Deal," Byleth said. "...You're going to help me emote? How do you plan on doing that?"

Claude flashed her his trademark smirk, the same stupid one he had given her when he knew he was right about something. Much to her surprise, however, his eyes shone with sincerity even though his smile was incredibly fake.

You're an interesting guy, Claude.

Interesting? Sothis scoffed inside of her head. Interesting as in 'wow, I think I know everything' sort of way!

Sothis, shut up.

He held out his hand toward her, and Byleth hesitantly took it. Claude pulled her forward, closer to him so that she faced him squarely. He winked, squeezing her hand slightly.

"You'll see."