Aurora [H.S AU]

Chapter 13

a/n: this is part of a double update! make sure you read chapter 12 before this one =) 

2019, September 13th - thursday | 8am

Aster's P.O.V.:

During the past 48 hours, I've only had 9 hours of sleep. For two days straight, I went to bed by the time I would usually be waking up, and I feel like I should be exhausted, not only for the lack of sleep, but mainly for messing up with my usual sleep routine.

But fuck, do I feel renewed!

Guess that's how you feel when you're so refreshingly fucked. Just to think about last night makes my insides feel like they're melting all over again. The sensation of her milky skin glued to mine, the feeling of her sweet, hot lips locked around my nipples while he drilled me from behind. It was rough, dirty, insanely hot. It was exactly what I needed, but at the same time, precisely the last thing I should've done.

I've spent so much time avoiding Pandemonium and any kind of contact with that... Hidden part of my life that I was almost convinced I don't need it in order to feel fulfilled, satisfied. But now that I remembered just how good it is to let go and give myself to my most primal instincts, to surrender to all the sensations that made my toes curl and my belly ache, it is going to be 10 times harder to resist it again.

Because the fact is, I need to ignore it. Ever since I've graduated, I decided to change my lifestyle, and unfortunately, going to sex clubs and fucking strangers does not have a place in my routine anymore. There's just too much to lose - if someone sees me there, if somehow my dad ends up knowing about my... extracurricular activities. That's a risk I can't take. I've promised myself I would leave it all behind and focus on my career and on what really matters.

I won't lie to you, deep down I know that one of the reasons my relationships haven't been successful is precisely because I've never found on a partner what I have at Pandemonium. And between being sexually frustrated and jeopardizing my career by investing my time on a relationship that is destined to failure, I've always choose to save at least the part of my life that matters the most.

One day I know I'll be able to go back doing the things I like, to have the type of fun I like, but I'm not there yet. I have changed my life and adapted it in order to become the person my father needs me to be, the person I need to be. I'm an adult, a business woman who needs to be taken seriously.

So yeah, last night was great, but it was nothing but a little slip, a lapse of judgement. It won't happen again, it can't happen again.

After taking a long shower, I sorted out the outfit for today and even though it's not Friday yet, I decide to go a little more casual today, instead of my usual tailleurs and dress shirts. Instead, I end up wearing tight leather pants, Louboutin boots with high heels and a loose fitted knitted sweater with a turtle neck - all black, of course. I don't like to use other colors at work, and I kinda like how my skin looks paler in contrast with the dark clothes.

I didn't have the time to go swimming this morning, as I usually do before work, but I'm sure riding that guy while he was eating out his girlfriend was enough of a cardio for today. At least, I feel very energetic as I step out of the elevator and cross the corridor towards my office, knowing that I still have at least half hour of quietude before people starts to arrive. I still need to review that last contract Stephanie typed last night.

Stephanie.

For the first time ever since I woke up, I feel a little spark of anger in the pit of my stomach, but I decide to ignore it. I won't let the misconduct of a clueless, young little slut ruin my good mood.