lonely heart, luke hemmings

> DOWN ON MY KNEES

alexa

planes are not my thing.

my mom told me i would be fine and just to try and sleep, but how am i supposed to sleep when i am far off the ground and over the ocean the majority of the time?

currently, i am driving to the airport with my two luggage bags next to me with jack and celeste in the front seat.

jack keeps talking about how it'll be okay.

"in conclusion, you'll probably have the worst time of your life." he ends with.

"jack hemmings!" celeste smacks his shoulder, and she turns behind me.

"it'll be fine." she gives me a warm smile.

but will it be fine?

and suddenly the airport is right next to me. i start to get the jitters, and bite my lip.

"ok. we're here." jack says, putting the car in park.

"guys i don't know about this. i really want to cancel, what if i crash and die? fuck, what if we fall into the ocean and no one knows and we are left to die? oh my god— fuck, im canceling— im so so, canceling."

"alexa— chill out." jack takes my phone. he laughs softly, i whine and get out— throwing my backpack over my shoulder gently.

"i'll help." jack says, getting out and grabbing both of my suitcases.

i turn to see a guy, taking a photo of me with a full on camera.

"is that person taking photos of me?"

jack turns and looks at him, visually getting angry.

"what the fuck do you think you're doing? get the fuck out before i make you."

the guy runs off and i am immediately nervous. even more than i was.

"okay bug." jack turn to me and pulls me into a fat hug; which i gladly take. "promise you'll be good for luke?"

i nod into his chest.

"i love you."

"i love you too."

—

i'll admit. i'm fucking terrified.

i haven't seen luke since christmas, and even then i only saw him for twenty minutes and we didn't even talk.

how the fuck do i even go through security without someone?

fuck.

i whine and stomp a little, frustrated. i take out my phone and call luke.

"hey alexa—"

"luke, how do i go through security?" he responses with a chuckle.

"go ask someone, i cant really help without being there." he says. "but stay on call."

"what now?"

"did you grab your boarding pass?" he asks.

i respond with a yes, looking around.

"perfect. do you see the security signs? follow those and you should be fine." he advises.

i follow them.

after twenty minutes, i arrive at security and tell luke i had to go, and he said he loves me.

i didn't say it back.

—

i'm sitting in the starbucks with a chai tea latte in front of me, airpods in and taylor swift playing.

my flight isn't for another hour, and i realized i didn't eat breakfast since my mom was rushing me this morning.

so, i had a mcdonald's breakfast sandwich and my starbucks drink in front of me.

luke.

"mate, you're not even helping." i groan, my older brother on the phone.

"i don't know, luke." jack says back, his tone annoyed.

"god. what does she eat at moms?" i ask, hoping to get a goddamn answer.

"nothing." he answers, "she's never there."

"well no shit, sherlock." i spat. "why is that anyway?"

"i shouldn't really be the one to tell you, luke." he sighs softly. "she just started coming here as a safe place, and then it stuck."

i nod, telling him goodbye and not even letting him say it back before hanging up.

"okay!" i hear before sierra walks into the kitchen, "i bought food and drinks for her. i wasn't sure what food she exactly liked, so i got vegan, vegetarian, and other food for her. i also got some candy i know they don't have in australia." she smiles a bright smile.

"thank you, honey." i kiss her temple, "i hope she truly likes this. also, we've got to talk later."