Ravenwolf's Rose

Falling In Love

It was as though I had been possessed. Did all of this tension inside of my heart lead me to this moment?

I couldn't move away from Kai because I wanted to dissolve the boundary between the both of us. I wanted to get as close as possible to him right now... and it seemed like he didn't want to part from me either...

When the towel fell onto the ground Kai pulled me closer to him. He kissed me a few more times... a little slowly at first and then even more passionately...

Just when I thought it would become intense the phone rang. 

Kai parted from me and I rested my hand on top of his collarbone. He hesitated before parting from me completely in order to answer the call. I could hear his low, but beautiful voice speak into the receiver...and moments later he came up to me again.

"The Davenport's want to meet me again." I nodded and he stood there quietly.

"It's alright. I understand..." I blushed a little while still unsure of myself. I didn't know what else to say... I didn't look up at him but he seemed fine... he went to get dressed and then he left. I could feel the traces of his lips on mine... and I couldn't help but touch my lips in awe...

What was I doing? I fell down and crouched a little in place while holding onto my head... this surreal feeling. Who knew after all of this time that I would do something like this with Kai?

I tried to calm my racing heart but the storm inside of me wouldn't subside...

I didn't want my thoughts to snowball so I tried to keep myself distracted before Kai returned, but that proved to be difficult...

When he did return he was relatively quiet which wasn't something out of character for him but... this time it felt different. When I walked out from the kitchen to see him standing outside on the patio, I couldn't shake off the feeling that he was thinking about something seriously. 

And since I couldn't get a reading on his blank facial expressions I wondered if I truly overstepped...

Well, maybe I did...but it seemed like he was welcoming of that kiss? So what had changed?

And what exactly did I want? What did I want him to feel?

"Hazel..." Kai softly spoke in the distance. I didn't realize he had stepped back inside the house... 

"I'll do the dishes..." I said while turning my back to him.

I made my way over to the sink with the plates from the dinner table but he followed after me. When he tried to help I insisted he rest.

"You have to go back to work soon so let me handle this."

"Hazel..." I avoided him so he quietly left my side...

When I finished cleaning up the kitchen I decided to go and pack my suitcase...but before I went upstairs I noticed that Kai was out on the patio again.  I didn't know whether or not it would be a good time to interrupt his thoughts... but I had been avoiding him for a while now. 

Even though I didn't know what he wanted to say...I still had to acknowledge that deep down it scared me...

When I went outside and stood next to him we quietly stood next to one another. I watched the dark ocean in the distance swell a little...

"Hazel...I wanted to talk to you earlier." I nodded and he continued. "I... think we shouldn't overthink the kiss." I turned to him ever so slightly and then I bit my lip in an attempt to conceal my feelings...

"This won't change anything between us..." he added and it seemed like a brick had fallen onto my heart... there was a long silence between us...

"At first... I thought you were going to take advantage of your position and I realized that wasn't the case a while ago... I wanted to tell you that after all this time I have seen how devoted you are to no avail... since I have seen your sincerity, I will continue to trust you. I realized that it's best that we continue the way we were..."

I stood there completely shocked... so he wants to go back to the way things were? Was it because he regretted the kiss? That he really only sees me as a colleague... as a benefactor to the Ravenwolf family? The blood in my body really did feel like it was drying up... how could this happen after all of this time?

When he leaned in towards me again I jolted backwards.

"Just... a bug..." his hand was wavering in front of my face and I shook my head.

"Right..." I said and he turned away. He seemed to be contemplating something a little deeper, but I couldn't stay here any longer.

After I excused myself I didn't dare look back at Kai... for some reason I thought that if I did I wouldn't be able to compose myself...

That night I didn't sleep well because it felt like there was a weight on my shoulders now... that kiss was definitely a lot more than just something simple between two adults.

And I didn't know what to think of Kai anymore...

When I woke up in the morning Kai was already gone on an earlier flight.

There was someone waiting for me when I did leave the vacation house to go to the airport... taking one last look at the house I wondered if I could really leave everything behind.

***

When I got back to the mansion I was greeted by Edna and Kenz. I told them all about my trip while editing a few details out and then settled back into my room again.

When I saw Nathan enter the foyer later that day he also asked me about my trip. I really was at a loss for words... I told him about the beach and the town and he seemed to be happy for me. When I realized that he had sent Kai there I glared at him.

When I entered my room I exhaled deeply. I looked at the bracelet that Henry Ravenwolf had given me again... my life would really never be the same, old man. Are you happy now? I looked up at the ceiling before crash landing onto my bed. I stared up for some time thinking through everything that had happened and tears started pouring out from my eyes.

Stunned, I sat up again while giggling through my tears. It had all come rushing into my heart finally...

There was a reason I was so upset.

A reason why I couldn't accept Kai's rejection.

A reason why I didn't want Kai to say our relationship would never change.

Because I had already changed...

I was in love with Kai.