Addicted To You | NCT Gang AU ✔️

Chapter 35

3rd Person's P.O.V.

Taeyong stood in front of Taeil's hospital bed, legs shaking and heart pounding. He had just heard his heartbeat flatline—the beeping sound sending shockwaves throughout his system. The instant feeling of panic took over his body; his heart sank to the floor. It was like all of the air in his lungs had been sucked right out; his body was lifeless. After a few seconds, he finally comprehended what was happening. He looked to his right, pushing the emergency button multiple times. He pushed it until his fingers became numb; it took several nurses to pull him away from the button, but he wouldn't let go. He couldn't accept it; it was unfair. "TAEIL!" he screamed in agony, "HYUNG!"

He watched as Taeil was announced dead, "time of death, 11:59 pm," spoke the doctor, emotionlessly. Taeyong's leg finally gave in, flopping to the floor like a fish. He wrapped his arms around them, leaning his head in between his legs.

"No," he whispered, "I didn't get to tell him. Tell him how much I loved him." He continues to sob into his arms, the feeling of being alone ripping his heart out. He kept crying for what felt like infinity. He wanted the pain to go away, but the regret and guilt were just too much. Taeil meant the world to him, and he couldn't, even once, act selflessly towards him.

The nurses had to push him outside the room, but he didn't want to leave. He wanted to stay longer in the presence of his Hyung. Eventually, he dragged himself out, sitting on the small chairs outside of the hospital room. He stared ahead, watching the walls close in, gripping onto his neck, strangling him. His throat was throbbing, pure and raw suffering that he couldn't quite describe. Why? Why did it have to be Taeil?

Next to arrive was Joohyun, she had left to get some food and dropped her bags instantly upon arriving. Her mouth completely agape in horror, and then, the tears. They fell like a river, streaming down her face. "W-what happened?" she asks, hoping that he wasn't gone, face scrunched in fear. Taeyong lifts his head, glancing in her direction and standing up. "He," he takes a deep breath, trying to compose himself, "he's dead." And just like that Joohyun was a sobbing mess, hot tears flowing down her perfect face. Taeyong pulled her into his arms, trying to calm her down, "it's okay; it's okay." He was telling himself this. It is okay. It has to be.

Taeyong told Joohyun to go home. She hadn't much rest and needed to be comfortable. He sat on the floor, for the first time in a while, he was clueless. Any average person would've gone home, but he couldn't. If he was closer to the hospital room, he was closer to Taeil. The doctor pitifully walked out with a crumpled piece of paper in his hand, clearing his throat. "Ahem, are you Lee Taeyong?" he asks, Taeyong looks up, eyes puffy from the crying and slowly nods. Wiping his tears off, he gently stands up, face-to-face with the much older doctor. The doctor hands over the piece of paper, "we found this under his pillow, I believe it's for you." Taeyong reaches out for it, catching a glimpse of his Hyung's handwriting, a frown painted across his face. The doctor doesn't let go, "Kid. You've been here for a while. I think you should go home and get some rest before reading this." Taeyong simply nods, before taking the paper, "thank you."

He decides that it is time to leave; he had been in that sickening hospital for too long. It had been hours since Taeil passed and he wasn't there for his gang. He drove through the night, hands on the red steering wheel. A small, yet painful smile painted across his face, reminding himself of the memories he had made over the years. He initially wanted black leather for the interior of his Porshe Cayenne, but Taeil had convinced him otherwise. Before he knew it, tears were spilling down his face once again. The drive to the mansion was sad and lonely; the longest ride he had.

He got out of his car, parking it right in front of the mansion instead of the garage and walking out. He pulled himself out of the vehicle and grudgingly trudged to the main door. He hoped that no one was waiting for him; he just wanted to be alone. Taeyong had never been one to show such raw emotions, but Taeil was someone he held so close to his heart. He looked around, all of his fond memories coming back, and then guilt. The times he was rude or mistreated him attacking him. His hands shook, he was afraid, nervous to see what Taeil had written to him.

He got to his bedroom, placing himself on the bed and lying down. It was beyond comfortable to have his bed back, something he had deeply missed. He took a deep breath, looking down at the crumpled paper that read, 'To Lee Taeyong,' on the back. Taeil's handwriting was neat and organised, just like him. He uncrumpled the piece of paper, straightening it out and looking down to read what was written:

Dear Taeyong-ssi,

The end is near, for you, I'm already gone. Please don't feel bad during this time, it was destined to happen, and in times like these, you've got to think of the positive side! I'm finally going to find out if there is an afterlife and meet my parents! I'll make sure to say hi to Seulgi and watch over you with her. I know that it's hard for you, I can't stop that from happening, it will always be painful to think back about me, just like it is to think of Seulgi. I write this while watching you sleep. I never told you how peaceful you look when you sleep. You won't think straight for a while, the world will seem like it's upside down, but trust me, there will be better days.

There will be days where you won't think of me at all, and those days will be filled with laughter and happiness. There will be days where you realise how much the people around you mean to you. I write this letter not to make you feel upset, but to comfort you. The world is a much better place with a smiling Taeyong, so through your bitter tears, please smile. For me.

And don't worry, I know how much you appreciated and cared for me. Just like I know how you suck at sharing your emotions, but it's okay. You don't have to feel guilty about anything that you said or didn't say, because I forgive and will always forgive you. The sun might not shine bright tomorrow or for the next few days, but my heart will always shine for you.

You've made my life worth living, and I hope that I've made yours worth living too. Don't forget to look after everyone and give Youngho a break; you know how he gets. Once you take down BTS and EXO, take a break. Go travel, see the world. Enjoy yourself, relax champ because you deserve it. I mean it, you deserve the world.

Well, I guess this is it. My final goodbye Taeyong, don't cry too much, I hate it when you cry. Just remember that I love you, Tae.

Forever and always,
- Taeil :)

Taeyong put the paper down, even in death, Taeil was still watching out for him. That night he slept peacefully, acknowledging that his Hyung is in a better place. I love you too, Hyung.

I decided to write a short chapter on Taeyong and how he was dealing with Taeil's death before they move on. 

Now, the plans that they've all been talking about will finally be revealed...