I Need You To Fix Me (A Sebastian Stan Story) Book 2

Panic

A/N: I own my OC and plotline. The Romanian used is not written by me, they are pharses from the interweb. Apologies for any mistakes. I really hope that you enjoy the chapter. :)

Dedicated to @Lady_Loki_00.

Sebastian's POV

The doctors have just left me. I am alone in Valerian's hospital room, letting the news sink into me. Her black out was caused by a severe shock, what it was I still don't know. I am waiting for Valerian to wake up from her drug-induced sleep. Her stomach pain was caused by the tumor they found on the lining of her stomach. Valerian, my fiancee, has Cancer and there is nothing I can do to help her. It's terminal. She's dying. Valerian is dying. They said that the csncer has spread to various parts of her body, the stomach is one of them.

She has been through so much. She was just starting to rebuild her life, she managed to get over her past and Jason, we only just found one another. I'm going to lose her! I'm going to lose her! I'm going going to lose her! I can't believe what the doctors have told me. She can't die, I need her. I need my girlfriend, fiancee, soon to be wife by my side. We're supposed to grow old together. We're supposed to be getting married in a weeks time! What am I going to do without her. I can't breathe. I can't breathe.

Okay, I need to calm down. Keep a clear head, Sebastian.

She's dying.

XOX

Reader's POV

'Bad things happen to good people', isn't that how the old saying goes? Why did things have to turn out this way, hadn't she suffered enough? His poor, helpless Valerian. She shouldn't even been here, in the hospital, attached to an IV. He stroked a stray hair away from her greyish toned face, she had dark, dark circles under her eyes. Dragostea lui săraci. He could not even bear to think of the pain she had been enduring all that time. He could not bear to imagine how she was going to react when she discovered that she had Cancer. Sebastian was going to have to tell her that the news. The same phrase kept rolling around in his mind, 'we're supposed to grow old together'. Now she wouldn't ever get to.

He sat on the edge of the hospital bed, the Doctor would soon being arriving soon with more test results. He placed a kiss on her forehead, a tear running down his cheek. More and more tears began to fall. He couldn't stop them. He wasn't crying because he was going to be lonely, he would still be living once she was gone. He was crying because she was suffering and there was nothing he could do to stop her pain. Cum nedrept de viață ar putea fi!

He had promised to protect her and he had failed.

“Oh dragostea mea, forgive me please. I'm so sorry. I wish I could just shield you from all of this, kept you wrapped up in your warm duvet and protect you from the world. 'It seems right now that all I've ever done in my life is making my way here to you', but it always seems I'm too late. Frumoasa mea înger, frumos, you are indeed an angel without wings. Adevărata mea dragoste. 'Cel mai bun Iubirea este genul care trezește sufletul și ne face să ajungă pentru mai mult, că plantele un foc în inimile noastre și aduce pace în mințile noastre și asta e ceea ce mi-ai dat.' I love you. Te iubesc. I just hope that you love me when you wake up.”

Sebastian's POV

Valerian is dying and there is nothing I can do.

XOX

Reader's POV

Valerian watched in horror as her husband slowly broke down before her, tears pouring down his face as he buried his face in her shoulder. "Sebastian-" she whispered, wrapping her arms around his shaking frame. Her fragile arms barely strong enough to defy gravity.

"No!" he cried, gasping as he began another round of sobs. "No, I refuse to acknowledge what they've just told me, I refuse! It's not true, please tell me it's not..."

Valerian gently kissed the top of his head, inhaling his scent of berries and spice. She memerised it, a few tears spilling herself. "I'm so sorry, Sebastian."

"Don't say that." he whined like a wounded animal, holding Valerian even closer to him, almost gathering her in his arms.

"You can't blame them, they were only doing their job." she tried to reason with him.

He pulled away and stared into her face, searching her eyes. Disbelief evident on his face. "Not well enough." he choked up again.

Valerian lifted her weak arms and cupped his chisled face in her trembling hands. "This is not their fault, it's no one's fault, they've done everything they can."

Sebastian pulled her hands away from his face, taking them both in his. Her hands were as cold as ice. "No, they haven't there has to be more that they can do? There has to be!"

"Sebastian-"

He tenderly placed a hand on the back of her head, playing with her short locks. "Five months," he whispered. "five months is all I get, it's not enough time for me, not when we're supposed to have years."

"Honey-"

"No! This is all so wrong, Valerian!"

She wearily pulled him to her again, one hand on his neck and the other around his waist. "There's nothing more that can be done the fact is...we have Five months. Five months is the limit."

"How can you be so calm about this?!"

"I have to be." she said plainly. "Only one of us can be hysterical. In five months-"

"It's not long enough!" he cried.

She sighed. "It never is."

"We're supposed to get married in a week."

Valerian nuzzled at his hair, taking in as much detail of his perfect locks as she could. "And we will, I'll still be here."

"That's not right though!"

"Look," she spoke soothingly, rubbing small circles into his back, trying to calm her love down. "we're obviously just going to have to work with the time we have left."

"Just stop it." he snarled.

"'Stop', what?"

His eyes bore into Valerian's soul, burning bright blue. "This is your life we're talking about, Valerian. You're not just a number of days, you're a human being with feelings and fears.You should be angry, not sitting here so calmly."

"If I act irrationally, what good is that going to do? It's just a waste of time." Valerian broke their eye contact, not wanting to seeing his reaction.

"Valerian-"

"I only have so long and I don't want to waste it being angry and resentful."

Sebastian leaned in closer. "Valerian."

"No, Seb, I need you to understand that-" he made her break of mid-sentence by bringing his lips to hers.

Valerian used as much of her energy as she could kissing the man she loved.

He pulled an inch away, leaning his forehead against his. "I'm not ready to say 'Goodbye' yet."

"We'll never be ready." the brunette female could feel her barriers breaking her down, her sadness beginning to seep through. "It's never a good time but we all have to say it at some point."

He kissed her shoulder and moved his lips up her jaw. "That's a very personal opinion."

"And you're welcome to form your own, I'm just telling you straight what mine is." she tried to smiling, showing no malice in what she said.

Sebastian tried to smile back, to keep strong for his dying love. "We're going to get through this."

She nodded, letting out a shaky breath. "I know."

"I love you."

She kissed him quickly on the lips. "I love you too."

"'Dope'."

Valerian felt tears spilling from her eyes. "'Dope'."