Outerbanks "falling in love"

Chapter 23- Not a size 0

Chapter 23- Not a size 0

Song-

Hold me while you wait

by; Lewis Capaldi

*Before I start the chapter I just wanted to say you are beautiful. No matter what size you are or you height, or anything. With social media we always compare ourselfs to other people instead of loving us for us. You are enough. Most stories I read the girls are potrayed as "perfect" and usually never talk about being self conscious. But everyone is self conscious sometimes. It's normal. That's the reason I added this part of the story to show that everybody feels this way and you are not alone (sorry for my little rant)*

Maddi's Pov-

"Omg Maddi you're bleeding" JJ says after we all calm down after finding the gold. We were closer to the cut at this point.

"I'm fine, Just my stitches"  I shrug off. Everyone looks to me John b laughs.

"how do you always get hurt, it's a problem" He jokes. We all start bursting out laughing. Nobody could stop smiling, we did it. We found the gold.

~

When we got home JJ pulled me into the bathroom. I hopped up on the counter and pulled my shirt off while he went to the hall closet to find the first aid kit. When he walks back in shuffling throw the first aid kit. He looks up and looks me up and down. I was in a bra and some shorts and suddenly felt self consious.

"Dang getting undressed for me already" JJ jokes. I playfully shove his shoulder. "So I found some bandages and a wash rag to clean up the blood"

"Okay thanks" I say trying to cover up as much as I can where he can still get my stomach. I keep thinking back to earlier, the girl. She was way more pretty and skinny than me. She's a size zero, I have stretchmarks, flabs and i'm definantly not a size zero. I wrap my arms around my upper half of my body trying to keep most of my stomach hidden.

"Okay this might sting" JJ says putting the rag on my cut. I let out a sligth hiss but the pain wasn't too bad.

"Sorry" He says looking up at me. He looks at where my arms are covering me up as he finishes putting the bandages on.

"Done?" I ask.

"Yeah"

"Okay" I quickly grab my shirt and start to put it back on.

"What's going on?" He asks noticing my urge to hide my body.

"Nothing" I say pulling my shirt down quickly. JJ looks at me confused.

"Baby why are you covering up, it's just me" He asks me grabbing my hands. I look into his ocean blue eyes. "Talk to me"

"It's just-i'm not-" I sturggle to find the words, I take a deep breath before letting it out "I'm not as skinny or as pretty as all the other girls you've been with" JJ looks at me in shock.

"What?" He asks.

"Like that girl today, she's so much prettier than me and is like a size zero. And i'm just- well I'm just me" I sigh looking down embarrased. I hear JJ sigh and then put his finger on my chin making me look at him.

"Maddi, you are the most beautiful person I have ever met. Inside and out." He says giving me a sincere look. I nod.

"But what abo-" I start.

"I like you more than any of those other girls, you mean so much more to me" He says giving me a light kiss. I should be happy from what he said but one thing stuck with me. Like. He likes me, I don't know if I was expecting him to say love but I was dissappointed when he didn't. But like I told Kie and Sara. It's JJ, he doesn't do love. I hop off the counter as JJ pulls me into a hug. I swallow my feelings and put on a smile.