Amore

Chapter 36

'Hugo's point of view'

"I think it would be best if you left" Lindsey says to me with tears in her eyes, Clearly hurt by my outburst, as she should. How is this possible, Mae and I are always so careful, how could she not tell me? "No, mum he is the father" Mae cries to her mother. "Or he was" She says after the silence in the room was too loud. I drop to my knees at Mae's hospital bed side like a selfish man. I need to comfort Mae and be there for her, yet I am so mad and angry that she didn't tell me. I thought as I covered my face with my hands. "Hugo please, come here" Mae says as she attempts to move out of the bed. I slowly move the hands that cover the tears on my face and stand to meet her. She looks so heartbroken, yet she is still worrying about me. My hand resumes to the position it was at previously, under her chin. "I hate myself for you not thinking you could tell me" I say weakly. Her hands move to mine under her chin. She looks into my eyes lovingly. However, before she can say anything Tommy burst through the door, I turn my body to meet him. Before I can think Tommy grabs the collar of my t shirt and shoves me against the wall brutally. "How dare you say you hate yourself; you are so selfish that you actually think right now is about you, Mae could have died in that car and you are more concerned about you!" Tommy shouts whilst still holding me against the wall. He is stronger than he looks and I refuse to punch Mae's brother to get him off of me. I understand that he is angry, yet if I hurt him it will make everything worse; I think whilst I move my face away from his hurtful words as he uses all his strength to keep me against the wall. Lilly runs over to try and intervene by grabbing onto Tommy's shoulders, whilst Lindsey just observes allowing her son to hurt me after I hurt her daughter. "Tommy get off of him!" Mae cries from her bed, still unable to move after her surgery. Tommy finally releases me from his grip, I look at him with nothing to say as I accept what he thinks of me in this moment. The room is silenced again, "you'd be a pathetic excuse of a father anyway" Tommy says with passion to break the silence. I feel the anger build up inside me and I have taken Tommy's crap for long enough, "I may be selfish, I know I don't deserve Mae. But I know that I will be a great father. My child will never grow up wondering why their dad doesn't come home at the weekends or why he works so much or why he never spends time with me, because I will be there" I say in Tommy's face as he begins to back away from me. Before I give the chance to anyone else in the room to push me, I leave. "Hugo, please come here, I need you" Mae says with sadness as I walk away from her.

Unsure of what to do or where to go I walk around the depressing hospital hallways looking at the sadness in people's eyes as their hope dies. I find an empty chair, in what looks like a waiting room and take it. I notice people starring at me and taking photos; however, I chose to ignore it and cover my face with my hands. "Hey, leave him alone he's a person and clearly needs his space, so save it with the photos" an unfamiliar voice says. I slowly remove my hands and look to my right to see the person who just stuck up for me, she is a woman, around the same age as me, she has long blonde hair and a nice smile. "Thanks" I say with a warm smile, momentarily forgetting what I was doing here. "Hugo" I hear from behind me in an angry tone, it's Lindsey. I turn away from her and sit back in my chair comfortably, yet she moves Infront of me. "Look, I don't want a lesson or a telling off, I know I shouldn't have said those things, just please not now" I say to Lindsey as she stands Infront of me. Unexpectedly she crouches down Infront of me and places her hands on my knees. "I'm so sorry about what Tommy said to you, he was out of line and we all know you would be a good father, the best even. Now we need to stop this anger and be there for Mae because although she acts strong, she is hurting" Lindsey says calmly as I start to loosen up from my tight posture. "She is really hurting Hugo, so go show her you love her as much as you say you do" She continues when I don't say anything the first time. I look at her and can't help but cry, she leans herself into me and holds me whilst I cry into her, like a coward who is scared and can't express his emotions in a normal way, she comforts me as she wraps her arms around me.