(Alternate) Steven Universe x Corrupt gem reader Insert

part 33: nagging feeling..

can't believe he put the poor child through such a state of internal turmoil...

you grumbled angrily to yourself during your walk to big donut, occasionally giving a friendly nod to passers-by, which was thankfully easier to do, thanks to your hand at helping to restore the ocean, though you still spooked a few, then you'd just glancing over to the ocean to watch as seagulls fly over it and hear the refreshing crash of the waves against the shore, to not only take your mind off of human greg's deceit, but to also take your mind off the disheartening reaction it caused in poor steven. the feelings he showed rattled you.

this is little steven we're talking about. the cheery, excitable, hammy child that displayed a contagious bout of child positivity. but there he was displaying such a state of self-doubt, practically admitting that he didn't feel like he was useful to the crystal gems. in fact, he didn't feel like one at all. oh stars how long has he felt that way? he's put on such a cheery air, that I didn't even identify it. you lower your head to the ground, letting a frustrated, sad whimper drone out in your throat. ms. rose quartz... I wish you were here to help...

you finally reach big donut, and carefully squeeze through the small door, catching the two employees' attention. "oh, it's you!" the girl sadie exclaimed in delight. "(name), right?" you nodded and sat at in front of the duo. you scanned the donuts in the glass case for a moment lifting a hand to move your bangs from your eyes for better vision. after a moment, you turn back to the duo. "a dozen donuts and a croissant, please." you requested in the most polite voice you could muster. sadie nods with a smile. "coming right up!" as you reach into your satchel to pull out the "money" steven had taught you about, you suddenly hear the lars boy scoff in amusement. "he's actually trained it to run errands for him!" he chortled. "not bad!"

trained It.

you grunted and curled your lip into a slight grimace. It... you puffed and took out the money from your satchel. "stop calling her an It!" sadie hisses, placing the requested items on the counter in front of you. lars scoffs and rolls his eyes as sadie gives you a warm smile. "a dozen donuts and a croissant!" you nodded and placed the needed amount of money on the counter, in which sadie takes. "have a nice day." with that you take the box and hold it in one paw turn to walk out of the small bakery. behind you, sadie whispered to lars. "he's got her trained really good though, don't you think?"

normally, you'd take it as a compliment, but right now you just give a distraught mental sigh.

at least steven has the pleasure of being seen as a person...
~~~~~~~~~

you returned to the beach temple,  lumbering onto the porch and resting your head onto the door frame. after a small huff, you opened the door, only to be greeted by a familiar pink gem throwing herself into your chest, wrapping her arms around your broad shoulders. "Oh (name)! you won't believe what happened!" she exclaimed excitedly, prompting you to squint your eye in suspicion. there was a minor pause as spinel giggled excitedly. "greg fixed the geode!"

...what?

you flick your gaze up to meet with Steven's happy, starry-eyes, as greg ruffled his hair and the gems just wore polite, delighted smiles. "it's true, (name)! and all's he did it with this!" he then holds up a... roll of... "duck tape?" you asked, an incredulous edge in your voice, to which greg chuckled at. "high quality duct tape." he adds matter of factly. "as I said before, well placed duct tape can patch up anything in a pinch." your mouth was partially opened in a disbelieving stupor, in which pearl responded with a incredulous but calm sigh, and crossed her arms. "trust me, I can't believe it either."

your mouth then slowly shut as your hidden eyes flickered between the gems, greg and steven, a sudden weight filling your chest.

So the geode can't be fixed with magical substances, but it can be fixed with a simple human tool. Ain't that fair.

You barely repressed an annoyed grimace, and instead wrinkled your muzzle lightly, biting your lower lip slightly.

Ah well... at least the child remembers his rightful place on the team again.

"...are.. you feelin' alright?"

you suddenly snapped back to reality at spinel's concerned voice. "(n-name) fine." you uttered, trying to keep yourself from sounding too startled. you then presented the box of donuts, along with the bagged croissant perched a top it. "(name) got donuts for everyone and a croissant for amethyst." everyone's eyes lit up at this, typically spinel, amethyst and Steven's as you pressed yourself through the door and set it on the table. "Oh, how thoughtful of you!" pearl noted, watching as steven opened the box and took a donut. "you're getting better and better, (name)." garnet calmly praised with a notable smile. "yeah, (nickname), you're the best!" amethyst exclaimed, her mouth full of croissant, following up with the bag itself. "aren't you gonna have some, (name)?" spinel asked as she took a bite of her donut. you rubbed your arm sheepishly, suddenly feeling a pang of uncertainty, as your eyes scanned the crystal gems, gripping at your bicep tensely.

He knows where he stands...

So... where do I truly stand in this team...?

You unconsciously looked down to your paws, pupils quivering.

...am I even a real crystal gem?

"(name)?" you grunt with a start, and blushed as you realized that everyone was staring at you. "you sure you're okay...?"

your head went blank, as you stared at the young child, the concern in his eyes making you feel a sudden air of anxiety. I can't afford to put anymore pressure on this boy... "(n-name) fine. honest!" you answered quickly, backing up towards the door. "(name) just needs.. er.. sea air. (Name) will be back!" you turned on your hooves and pressed yourself back through the door, trying your best to ignore the feeling of multiple eyes on you as those nagging thoughts came back at you hard, eliciting a huff of saddened frustration.

who truly am I?