Running After The Dusk

10

Halt

Maybe at that moment, I could say that I got worried. Not because of what he might say but because of what will he think. At isa pa, hindi ko rin alam kung ano ang pumasok sa isip ko para sundan s'ya. Alam n'yo ba 'yon? yung ayaw ng katawan mo pero pinipilit ka ng kalooban mo. Damn this conscience! I don't have any idea why it's telling me to find him.

Hinalughog ko ang buong Chev pero kahit isang anino ni Vino ay hindi ko matagpuan. His picture kept on flashing on my mind almost as if I am using that as a visual reference to find him. Paulit-ulit na tumatakbo sa isip ko ang kulay ng jersey n'ya pati ang matipuno nitong katawan.  Nagpalipat lipat ako ng classroom at bumalik sa mismong parking lot para hanapin siya. I even asked some of the students kung nakita nila si Vino pero iisa lang ang sagot - hindi nila alam.

I hate myself! Hindi ko ba alam kung bakit balisang balisa ako kakahanap sakanya. I shouldn't be finding him, I shouldn't be caring about him, diba? Ano naman kung mawala siya, ano naman kung anong maisip n'ya? and since when did I start caring about what other people thinks? I swear.

"Saan ka pupunta?" Ang pagkabalisa ko ay agad na napawi nang marinig ko ang kapamilyaran ng boses.  I gulped nervously when I felt like my foot are sticked on the floor. Kahit anong pilit kong maglakad palayo ay nakadikit ang paa ko sa sahig. In a split second, I felt his warm presence behind me. Huminga ako ng malalim, nagbabaka sakaling matanggal ang kaba na bumabalot sa'king dibdib.

"You're here."

He remained wearing an unidentified expression. Napa iling ako nang mapansin ko ang pawis n'yang dahan dahang tumutulo sa gilid ng mala porselana n'yang mukha. 

"Where did you go? I was looking for you."

He did not answer.

"Yung team mates mo nakauwi na ata."

Still no answer.

Huminga ako ng malalim, obviously trying to contain my feelings ang extending my patience. Calm down, Halt. Kailangan mo lang iexplain na mali s'ya ng inaakala sa nakita n'ya and after that you are free to leave. Magawa ko lang 'yon ay mahimbing na akong makakatulog mamaya.

"Sino ba kausap ko? yung hangin?" Tanong ko.

Nakatitig pa rin siya sa mukha ko ng walang emosyon sa mga mata. I really don't get this man, balak niya bang makipaglaban ng staring contest sa'kin? and I don't get myself too. Why do I have to run all the way to this place just to explain the stupid thing he saw a while ago?

I let out a deep sigh which signs that I'm almost losing my patience. Ay malamang! Ikaw ba naman magsalita tas tititigan ka lang.  "Kung wala kang balak kausapin ako, aali-"

"Sino 'yon?"

Ang naiiritang pakiramdam ko ay agad napalitan ng kaba at gulat. There's something wrong with his voice. Was it because he's tired? It was cold. There was no hint of confusion nor frustration in his voice. Sobrang lamig ng boses niya at parang hindi si Vino ang nagsasalita sa harapan ko ngayon.

"What the hell are you talking about? Anong sino?" Naguguluhan kong tanong.

"Is he your boyfriend?" He asked nonchalantly, like he doesn't care about my answer. Even so, inisip ko ang lahat ng nangyari kanina. Anong boyfriend ang pinagsasabi nito? Ni hindi ko nga makuhang lumandi dahil baka pagalitan ako ng tatay ko pagkatapos aakasuhan niya akong may boyfriend?